347 – I’m not alone – 2
It’s time for the sun to go down and the students to disappear one by one. Normally, I would have gone back to my dorm and rested, but now I was wandering outside.
“…Mother, you passed out.”
A word that Erich carefully brought out right after the club class ended. It is possible for her to stay still even after hearing those words, only with the personality of a second prince.
Actually, I expected it to some extent. Even when I served in the last war, she was told, she was very worried about her mother and worried about her. But three years after the end of the war, husband and son go to war side by side again? No matter how mentally strong a person is, it’s something to fall into a panic.
Still, I didn’t expect it to end in fainting. No, this is something that cannot be tolerated, so is it natural?
“The nanny was also in trouble. My mother is looking for my brother even while crying, so I have to call him, but it’s hard to say anything because my brother isn’t free. “
He remembered Erich’s words as he was scratching his head and let out a small sigh.
My mother collapsed and she should have gone to the manor before she found me. No matter how much the head of household was by my mother’s side, even if I had thought of going there before the war, I had to go first. I am a half-son, Nabal, and from my mother’s point of view, I am a complete son.
Just like the family head thinks of me as his son.
‘Damn it.’
I feel like my head is pounding every day these days. It’s just a pity that most of this tingling is self-inflicted.
From noble mtl dot com
While I was wandering in front of the inn for such a long time, a wizard from my family appeared through a teleport.
“Lord Soga. I’m here to meet you.”
“Yes.”
A wizard who urgently contacted the butler and requested it. There is no need to ask for the family wizard since there is the best wizard on the continent right next to you, but since I, the son, have to go alone, I called the family wizard.
If I tell Ma Jong-gong or other lovers the news that my mother has collapsed for no reason, it’s like shooting people who are already feeling heartbroken. My only concern is enough.
“How is your mother?”
When I quietly talked to the wizard who was preparing to teleport, the wizard’s expression darkened slightly.
“Fortunately, you opened your eyes right before we left, but I heard you were only drinking water.”
I bit my lip at those words. At least dehydration was avoided, but only dehydration was avoided. It sounds like you’ve been on an empty stomach for quite some time.
“I’m sure you’ll be waiting a long time. Let’s go.”
“Yes.”
I shook off my endless worries and put my hand on the wizard’s shoulder.
You have to show your face as soon as possible when you have time to worry.
As soon as he arrived at the main gate of the lord’s castle, he hurriedly moved his steps. Even the servants who bowed at the appearance of Sogaju and the knights who saluted did not come into sight. So much so that he just waved his hand and said hello.
Of course, the servants of the family didn’t seem to pay much attention to me, perhaps because it was an emergency for the mistress’ fainting. The sight of it made me even more frustrated.
“Lord Soga!”
“The butler.”
And soon after, the butler rushed over.
“You’ve come just right. Your wife just got up—”
“Go right. Are you in the bedroom?”
“Yes, yes!”
Since Gajoo and Sogaju are both institutionalized Jibakryeong, the butler handles most of the manor’s affairs. Since he was the butler with a heavy load of work and commensurate ability, he always maintained a firm and calm appearance, but even such a butler stuttered and showed a puzzled expression without filtering.
‘It fits perfectly.’
I felt embarrassed by the butler’s words.
I’m late. To be told that I came just right, I should have come a long time ago, not now.
“Lord Soga. Your wife has just regained consciousness, so she probably won’t be able to control her emotions when she sees Lord Soga. Only Lord Soga can soothe her right now…”
I mechanically nodded to the butler who was constantly explaining things next to me. In summary, the mother’s condition is not normal, so don’t be agitated no matter what you see, and don’t try to comfort her as much as possible.
Enough to understand. That’s what I came for in the first place.
“And if it’s possible, please persuade your wife to give me a light meal.”
“Please do so.”
As if relieved by my answer, the butler sighed.
I’m going crazy. My son had to come forward and persuade me to eat, how devastated I was.
***
There is no strength in the body. Tears don’t even come out right now.
“Nia, if you’re not going to eat, you shouldn’t be drinking enough water.”
“I have no idea…”
I barely answered Laura’s words with a cracked voice. I have neither the strength to shake my head nor the strength to open my mouth. To the point where I just want to lie down and go to sleep.
Besides, I’ve already had enough to drink. I’d be fine if I had three drinks.
“You must have spilled more than you drank? Don’t you drink quickly?”
In response to the nonsense, Laura gently turned her head in a direction out of sight.
Then I heard Laura let out a big sigh, but she didn’t force my head to turn or anything like that. It seems that even Laura is restraining herself because my physical condition is not very good.
“The sword will come too, will you greet me like that? Do you want to show a haggard image to your son who is going to go to the battlefield soon?”
Instead, I tried persuasion in a more sure way than anything else.
“Karl is coming?”
She slowly turned her head towards Laura. Carl, is he really coming?
“Yes. The butler sent the wizard to the academy earlier. If you teleport, he will come soon.”
After saying that, Laura held out a glass of water to me. It was as if she was saying that she wasn’t going to drink even after you heard this.
“…I’ll drink.”
Of course not. As a mother, you can’t show your child a sick face, can you?
“Ah.”
“Ah.”
But I lost it just as I was about to put the glass to my mouth. Fortunately, I dropped it on the duvet and it didn’t break, but the duvet was completely wet.
It’s cold. It’s summer now, why is it so cold?
“Now that Sera is healed, you are the problem.”
She couldn’t bear to raise her head at Laura’s muttering words.
To be honest, even Laura would have a hard time like me. There’s no way Laura, who cherished Carl like her own child, wouldn’t mind.
“A new blanket soon—”
– Knock Knock
“Mother, this is Carl. May I come in?”
Laura’s voice interrupted Laura’s voice, and Laura’s eyes turned to the door at the same time.
Laura looked at the door and hurriedly lifted the wet blanket.
“So, Lord Soga. Please wait a moment.”
“Chief Maid? Is there something going on inside?”
“No, she’s changing her clothes!”
With a strange excuse, Laura quickly stuffed the wet blanket into the corner and threw a spare blanket at me.
I didn’t have much strength in my body, but I quickly covered the blanket as much as I did now. I can’t show Carl, who must have heard that I had fallen, covered with a wet blanket.
“You may come in now.”
As soon as I confirmed that I was covering the futon, Laura spoke to Carl.
However, perhaps because he was questioning Laura’s voice, which sounded strangely urgent, Carl showed no reaction.
“Then let’s go in.”
Fortunately, the door slowly opens and the knife carefully enters. He seemed to be running in a hurry, but when he saw his slightly tousled hair and worried face, his eyes lit up.
It’s strange. I thought there were no more tears to come out, but when I saw the knife, tears came out again.
‘It just makes me worry.’
Of course I know why I am doing this.
Because I felt weird. It’s Carl who has to leave for the battlefield soon, but it would rather be Carl who wants to cry, and who needs to be consoled is also Carl, but this mother who doesn’t look like her is taking away her son’s sadness. As a mother, instead of comforting and comforting her son, she makes her son worry and sheds tears in front of him.
“Mother, are you okay?”
It still is. As if this ugly mother is also considered a mother, Carl came up to me and asked how I was doing.
“Knife…”
“Yes, Mother. I am here.”
“Knife, knife… My baby…”
I kept calling Carl’s name and holding Carl’s hand.
It’s rough. Hands who suffered from being immersed in training, participating in the war, and living as the head of the inspection department. Although born into a noble family, this hand suffered so much.
And it was only after I held that hand that I suddenly remembered it. How long has it been since I held this child’s hand affectionately? No, would there have been?
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry…”
Tears fell on the back of the knife’s hand. I couldn’t stop knowing I didn’t deserve this. I keep going even though I know that the more I do this, the more Carl gets into trouble.
“A mother is of no help to her son…!”
A son who is taken to war not once but twice. What did I do to such a son?
If, very if, it shouldn’t be, but really if—if I can’t see Carl for the last time today, can I remain a good mother to Carl? Am I a good mother in this child’s memory?
I kept thinking about that while lying in bed. When I fell asleep as if I was fainting, I even dreamed of the knife going wrong.
So he held Carl’s hand tightly. It seemed that if I let go of this hand, the sword would leave to a place I could never return to.
***
It’s embarrassing. I think I know why the butler was flustered. Your mother’s condition is very serious.
A mother who holds my hand and won’t let go. A mother who only repeats the words “I’m sorry”. I had never seen my mother, who had always been the mistress of the Krasius family for 300 years and looked like an aristocrat, vent her emotions like this.
“Mother, son, can’t help at all…!”
The words her mother probably hid in her chest. When she heard that, she couldn’t answer.
Since this half-son has not been able to treat her mother as her mother, why is a mother blaming herself for losing her real son?
‘Damn it.’
I looked down at her mother’s hand. In fact, she is such a weak force that it would be embarrassing to even say she was captured. A force weak enough to be released immediately by simply pulling her hand back.
But it’s strange. It’s such a weak power, but why does it feel so strong?
When she was strangled by Tala, she cut off her wrists and splattered, so why can’t she escape even with such weak power now?
It’s a strange thing.