#15 Notice (2)
Anxiety has been present since Elric first returned to Weebin.
It was an emotion that grew thicker each time the smile on his face grew thicker when he returned, and each time his voice became kinder.
It’s so precious I don’t want to lose it.
I am so happy that I keep doubting if this is real.
With such feelings, it was decided to lead the inauguration ceremony.
He was determined that everything would work out this way.
On the day of the inauguration, Tyria found it.
– I found it.
Among the crowds in the plaza was the tall old man he had met in the winter mountains when he was young.
He was the man Elric called his teacher, and he was also the man who left him as he passed out that day.
I couldn’t forget.
Because when I think of him, a faint sense of fear and a sense of queerness have always been with me.
It was because the eyes that met me while I was losing my mind were so empty.
There was an infinitely intuitive conviction that his appearance would change Elric’s mood.
It was right.
Elric, who had not laughed that day and seemed worried until the inauguration ceremony began, burst into Tyria’s dwindling anxiety once again.
-Float, you left… .
We don’t know exactly what happened, but the raid on the mansion with the master who returned that day probably made Elric leave here.
Then it had to be stopped.
slap!
got the word out
Because of bare feet and thin clothes, the early morning air is cold.
The scratches were engraved on the back of the foot or the back of the hand, and more than that, breathing became extremely rapid.
After passing through the wheat fields and turning around the entrance to the village, the transcontinental railroad’s Wibin station comes out.
Upon arriving there, Tyria got off her horse.
I just jumped into the reverse.
seemed
“house owner!”
Elric was just about to enter the station.
Beside him was a man with black hair.
The two of them stopped walking.
A small astonishment appeared on Elric’s exposed face.
However, it soon disappeared as if it had been washed.
My heart felt tight.
Slowly Tyria approached him.
It was such a moment.
“You go in first.”
“Deposit… .”
A black-haired man entered the station.
Everyone around me has also disappeared.
Elric said right after.
“Why did you follow me?”
It was a cold voice.
Suddenly, Tyria’s steps stopped.
It felt like my breath stopped.
“yes… ?”
“I obviously told the workers. I will leave this land.”
Tyria was speechless.
My head flipped around.
yes, it was
Elric was kasha.
He must be trying to say that the war has intensified and he can no longer stay here.
I read the newspaper and now I have to say that I know… .
“I hope you don’t notice.”
The words that were handed to me went blank in my head.
“I just needed a place to hide until I was well. It’s time to leave.”
His words were too sharp.
Each word seemed to pierce the heart and crush the inside.
Tyria looked Elric right in the eyes.
It was strange.
I couldn’t read anything.
Although he had practiced reading people’s expressions and signs fairly constantly, he couldn’t detect anything in his bright red eyes.
I was afraid of it.
“I am… .”
“It doesn’t make sense. Please stop going in.”
Tyria squeezed the hem of her skirt.
My face turned red.
My eyes were hot.
I couldn’t understand this situation.
The sudden change of a person who had walked hand in hand until yesterday was something Tyria couldn’t understand at all.
I wanted to think that I was still dreaming.
I’d rather it all be a terrible nightmare.
However, such a miracle seemed far off.
The sensation was so vivid.
No, it seems that the five senses have been amplified more than usual.
The pain in the soles of my feet and the coolness of the morning air overwhelm my body.
The heat rising from within collides with them.
Meanwhile, the fear was strong.
The thought that she would never see him again if she went back like this didn’t disappear, and Tyria’s steps naturally headed forward.
Elric stood still.
As if he would not allow anything, he just looked down at Tyria without spilling a single word of emotion.
If I stretch out my hand like that, it’s close enough to touch.
Tyria looked up at Elric.
The expressionless expression seemed to be looking at a tightly closed door.
Stop thinking you have to say something to him.
“not… It’s possible.”
Tyria grabbed Elric by the collar.
“If you go, no.”
He stuttered.
I gripped my collar tighter.
My mind went blank with desperation.
Even if you give reasons to convince him, it won’t be enough.
You can give quite a few reasons to think why you shouldn’t leave, why you should be here.
But nothing came to mind.
Tyria mechanically repeated the words almost forced.
“… You must not go. The head of the household must be here.”
The tip of my nose was too hot.
until the smell disappears.
“Aren’t you the lord? Didn’t you say you would protect this place? however… .”
It felt like my eyes would burn.
to such an extent that the vision is blurred.
“Go-go is Portman’s owner.”
It was a phenomenon Tyria had never experienced before in her life.
Even when I was in pain every day amidst countless abuses in my childhood, the first day he left, and the 10 years he wasn’t there.
No other day was as painful as today.
I wasn’t as irrational as today, and I wasn’t as hard to control myself as today.
‘no.’
There was no such thing as being swayed by those forced emotions.
I couldn’t help but think that I didn’t want to live without Elric.
How the hell am I supposed to stop it?
What should I say to someone who hits the wall?
The more I thought about it, the more I was out of breath.
The urgency was also heightened.
My heart beat like crazy, blocking my thoughts.
Some say breakup is loss.
Wrong.
Tyria’s separation was not a loss.
I feel like a stake is driven into my heart just by thinking about losing it. How can I call this a loss?
How can I talk about emptiness if I feel a new pain every moment just thinking about a tomorrow without him.
That was the reason.
Again, tears flowed down my cheeks.
At the same time, the words I had stored inside were vomited out like a regurgitation.
“I like… .”
So please don’t go.
please stay here
please stay by my side
It was more like a murmur.
Tyria’s head fell.
A mask once broken cannot be put back together.
The tears that had been burning in my eyes became streams and dripped down from the tip of my chin.
There was a strange certainty.
Even though this is the first time I’ve brushed my insides out of my mouth.
Even though I had never done anything like this before.
“… I know.”
I had a hunch that I would be rejected.
Somewhere in the field of vision toward the floor was Elric’s feet.
From noble mtl dot com
I tried to add strength to the hand holding his collar.
“Let go.”
he removed his hand
Soon, his feet disappeared from sight.
I looked up belatedly, but Elric was nowhere to be seen.
Tyria was destroyed as it was.
Tears just flowed incessantly.
She sat somewhere in the station and didn’t move a step until Grialdio and the maid arrived.
*
It is easier to resent than to understand.
Elric knew that.
“Let’s go.”
“Uh, Ershi… .”
“Let’s go.”
As I said, I closed the door of the seat.
Before long, the train vomited vibrations.
He groaned and moved forward.
Elric then crouched down.
He held his chest and let out a long breath.
I closed my eyes.
‘… Good job.’
It was a good thing that I didn’t shake at that moment.
Keeping the expression until the end was the right choice.
What will change if you don’t shake her hand.
In fact, if I say that this situation exists, what will change?
That was the cruelest thing to Tyria.
Jumping into a battlefield where life and death will be unclear, she will wait if I tell you that I love you too.
Even if I can’t come back, I’ll live with it for the rest of my life.
she was that kind of person
So I can’t say anything at all.
Rather, you should make them resent, get angry, and hate themselves.
The breakup hurt.
Being hurt was more painful than having a knife stabbed in the stomach, arrows being stabbed in the back, and being burned by burns.
I hated myself for not being able to do that.
I hope.
I hope she thinks she’s such a bad person and doesn’t want to see her again.
May she completely erase herself from the rest of her life.
You will be able to do that.
‘Resentment is easier than understanding.’
It would be easier than missing and hurting for the rest of your life.
Elric would too.
I wouldn’t look back at what I had left behind.
I would also split the time to look back on her pain and look ahead.
However, he would take every step with resentment at the end.
If you do that, you will be able to reach it.
thump-
The joint was realigned.
A hatred welled up within him that made him forget even the pain.
Elric’s eyes finally opened,
Suuuu-
It was red like blood.
Damn…
🥺