74 – I’m not discouraged
From Noble mtl dot com
That evening, after hearing a brief briefing on the future schedule, including confirmation of the debut date and showcase stage, the members, including me, were sent home early.
It was a day worth celebrating, so it was thanks to the owner’s consideration, telling us to go home quickly and spend meaningful time with our families.
As soon as I returned home, my family and I moved to the house across the street, where there was so much food and a cake that it made us break our legs.
These were none other than the foods my mom and aunt made together earlier today to celebrate the day.
“Congratulations, sister!”
“Congratulations, my daughter.”
“You had a hard time surviving trainee life, Yuna.”
“Thank you, Aunt. Mom and Eugene too.”
It was heartbreaking to see everyone congratulating us with one mind and one mind even though we haven’t debuted yet and the debut date has only been confirmed. It may have been especially so because her aunt was so happy for her with tears in her eyes as if it were her own.
“Thank you for your hard work, Yuna. “It will be difficult in the future, but endure well.”
“Yes, my daughter can do it. “Dad, you know what I mean, right?”
“Of course. Don’t worry uncle either. “I’m Han Yuna, Han Yuna.”
I spoke proudly with as confident an expression as possible, and the concerns on my uncle and father’s faces disappeared like melting snow.
“… ….”
Meanwhile, after initially congratulating me, Park Si-yoon just looked at me without saying anything. I felt a strange sense of guilt as he looked into my inner thoughts.
“Honey, quickly open the champagne first.”
“That’s right, just wait a moment.”
Anyway, the adults were more excited and fussed than I was when my debut was confirmed today, and among them, her mother pointed to what looked like a bottle of alcohol sitting next to her table.
That was champagne. I thought it was definitely wine. Dad, Mom, and even Park Si-yoon and her parents all like wine, so I thought they brought it for a glass of wine.
“Would you like some lasagna? “You like this.”
“Ah, yes. Thank you.”
Among these, Park Si-yoon seemed to have expected me to target lasagna first, and at just the right time, he served golden-cooked lasagna on a plate in front of me.
“Oppa, oppa! Me too!”
Since Han Yujin and I had similar tastes, she also asked for lasagna and knocked on the plate in front of her with her fork.
Park Si-yoon, who was watching this scene, glanced in my direction and firmly drew a line by handing me the utensils he had been using.
“Do you have no hands? “Eat your own portion.”
“Wow, just because you’re dating your sister, you can’t do this to me, right? Too bad!”
In contrast to Han Yu-jin, who was offended by that behavior, I was embarrassed because I couldn’t stop her laughter from coming out with her face turning red.
To be honest, I don’t know about other people, but I don’t think I would have been jealous of my younger sister because she is like a future sister-in-law and a younger sibling that I have seen since I was young.
But, aside from her jealousy, the attitude of only caring about my woman seemed so wonderful and pretty. I was happy to be able to feel that I was a special person to Park Si-yoon.
“hahahaha, Si-yoon did the right thing. Normally, you only have to do that to her own wife.”
Her father came out to support Park Si-yoon’s behavior, but it wasn’t long before her mother was next to her, glaring with her fierce eyes and pinching her thigh.
“The person who knows that has never done anything like that for me since they got married? You.”
“Hmm. Yes, that’s what you say, honey. “Why are you shaking your hand?”
“That’s because people who know say it! Joy!”
Just by looking at her like that, I can tell that my mom is the type that secretly demands her attention. Surprisingly, her aunt doesn’t seem to care much about this. If you look at the two of them normally, it would seem like they are opposites.
“Now, would you like a glass of champagne, Yuna?”
“Can I drink this, Auntie?”
I was in the midst of analyzing the differences between my mother and aunt that suddenly occurred to me. She handed me a tall glass and I looked at her in surprise as my aunt offered me champagne.
Of course, as far as I know, champagne is also a beverage that contains alcohol.
“It’s okay to have a drink on a long-awaited celebration day. “There are adults too.”
“Then I’ll just have one drink. Park Si-yoon, what about you?”
“I’ll just have one drink too. “I’d like to make a toast.”
When Park Si-yoon and I nodded at her, my aunt smiled as she poured champagne into her own glass. She always felt it, but her aunt’s smile seemed to have a magical power that made people feel comfortable.
“Come on, if everyone’s drinks are full, let’s have a toast.”
“Wow!”
When her father, who confirmed that everyone’s glasses were full of translucent champagne, proposed a toast, Han Yu-jin, who usually tried her best to secretly steal her father’s beer, responded most vigorously.
That and that, I wonder if I will become a drunkard later on.
He will also be going to college next year, so naturally there will be worries. I just hope I don’t get into an accident somewhere.
“Our prospective idol… This is not it. For the future of Armo member, Yuna Han!”
“For!”
Each glass held high in the middle of the table clinked in the center, and a clear sound rang out.
When alcohol was added like that, the air heated up in an instant, as it always does among adults.
***
Wow, I’m out of my mind.
I had to stop drinking after just one drink. I had a bad memory at work, so I drank a few more drinks to forget it, but I never thought it would end up like this.
Squeak.
When I roughly laid down on the bed in Park Si-yoon’s room, the mattress let out a small scream.
I’m telling you to be quiet. If your master hears this, he will think that I am very heavy.
“… “Why did you drink so much?”
While I was burying my hot face in the blanket and cooling off with a cool cloth, I heard Park Si-yoon’s voice. Rather than feeling frustrated, he seemed genuinely curious as to why I drank so much.
“Well, I drink what my aunt gives me….”
“Somewhere along the way, your side was asking for more first, so what?”
Sarak.
My boyfriend, who mutters as if it is absurd, straightens my messy hair and wipes the sweat from my forehead.
Anyhow, you say you’re sweet, but you’re like a tsundere.
“… What happened at work today? “The atmosphere is different from when I went there.”
The stroking hand stopped for a moment, and the question that came out of Park Si-yoon’s mouth seemed to wake him up a little.
As expected, it’s sharp. It’s so surprising and happy that it’s a story limited only to me.
“Ugh, nothing special happened….”
“Don’t lie in plain sight. “I told you before, if you have anything to discuss, please let me know right away.”
“That’s right, it was like that.”
On the day we found out about each other’s feelings, this is what Park Si-yoon asked me the most at the park. Regardless of whether you are helpful or not, just sharing your concerns with someone can help you feel lighter, so be sure to do so.
Rather, those honest words touched my heart more. A normal person would have told me to just tell him that he would do something.
“Actually, it wasn’t really a big deal. “Today, a scandal broke out with a senior at my company, and he said the boss was very angry because of it.”
“You’re discouraged because it feels like it’s your job.”
“It’s similar. On the other hand, I felt sorry for the boss and members….”
For some reason, the members and the boss trusted me, but I felt like I wasn’t living up to that.
Ever since I decided to date Park Si-yoon, I thought I would never feel this way, but when I actually found myself in that situation, it was a little different from what I expected. Rather, if I didn’t feel anything at all in that situation, wouldn’t I be too cold-blooded?
“Don’t you regret it? “You decided to date me.”
I shook my head resolutely at the question Park Si-yoon insinuated while handing over my hair again. No matter how many negative emotions swirled around in my head, I was confident that I had never felt anything like that.
“Yeah, I don’t think so. No, rather….”
“Rather?”
“… If I hadn’t started this job, that regret would have occurred in an instant. “I was a little scared back then.”
This is a dream I have been chasing for almost 5 years. Even the connection between members and people from other companies is not that strong.
Nevertheless, the fact that I had that thought probably means that Park Si-yoon holds that much importance to me. So, for a moment, I had this fear of what would happen to me if this person disappeared.
Human emotions are so fragile that once negative thoughts start to arise, they are uncontrollable.
“Sorry. It seems like only yesterday that I told you to trust me, but you’re already thinking such foolish things…. “I’m so pathetic.”
“I don’t think it’s particularly pathetic. “It makes me happy that you think that much of me.”
“Really? Thank goodness.”
I don’t know about anyone else, but I hoped that Park Si-yoon wouldn’t be disillusioned with me like this. When I heard those words confirmed directly from the person’s own mouth, I felt like the anxiety that had remained in some part of me was fading away a little.
With his face buried in the blanket turned toward the ceiling, he moved to Park Si-yoon’s thigh and laid his head down.
Park Si-yoon, who kindly guided me to her thighs as I approached her, squirming like slime, looked at me again and smiled softly. As he watched that smile, he couldn’t stand it any longer.
Maybe it’s because the range of emotional changes increased with alcohol.
“Park Si-yoon…. “No, Si-yoon.”
“Why?”
I guess I’m kind of used to it now. Compared to the past, the response to this title is minimal.
Although that was a bit disappointing, I didn’t feel bad, so I smiled heartily while putting my hand on my boyfriend’s cheek.
“Hey, I like it.”
“Me too.”
“Where did the backstory go?”
“… Yes, I like it too.”
Okay, passed.
When I heard the answer I wanted from my boyfriend, I finally felt relieved. I don’t even know what I was anxious about, but whatever.
I thought about it carefully today, and I found out. After all, I don’t want to miss anything.
I don’t want to abandon the idol life I will continue with my current members and the happy times I had with this man. It’s all part of my happiness.
So, I’m going to end my complaining today. No matter what consequences come next, I will overcome it. Even if it’s just so I don’t disappoint myself.
It’s okay. Anyway, it’ll be okay. Because from now on, I will always be by your side.
From Noble mtl dot com
Right, Park Si-yoon?
“In that sense, can I go to sleep?”
“I’m fine, but I don’t think your parents will say anything.”
“It’s okay. “Everyone drank wine and relaxed, so what?”
He smiles mischievously and stands up straight into Park Si-yoon’s arms.
I intentionally put my weight on it and pushed it to the side, as if toppling it over, and laid my body on top of it.
“… ….”
Then Park Si-yoon bit his lip and avoided his gaze with an expression as if he was patiently waiting for something.
Why is he like this?