It was a trauma to overcome. Jungwoo clenched his fists. And while they were resolute for a long time, Eric looked at the stage with a dazed expression in many ways.
‘What am I doing here.’
Rami’s rejection was expected. Nevertheless, when he faced the expected result, Eric had no choice but to realize. That Eric wasn’t fully prepared for that ending yet.
At first I thought I was free. I thought it was rather comfortable because I didn’t have to be tied down in a relationship that wouldn’t last anymore. In a way, it was. But more than comfortable, a sense of helplessness that was hard to fathom hit him hard.
The world felt meaningless. I was definitely not born because of Rami, nor did I start music because of Rami, but after Rami left all of that, I didn’t feel motivated for anything.
‘Calm down, Eric.’
Eric whispered to himself.
‘I know it’s natural to do this, and I know it has to be like this, but keep your senses. How unsightly I’m going to show.’
If it’s a shabby and ugly look, it has already been shown to millions of people. I didn’t want to show only the ugly side until the last moment.
If it’s going to be kicked anyway, if it’s kicked, even then, that last appearance…
[ Participants of The Musicians. Nice to see you again. ]
And at that moment, the voice of the judge, Jeff, fell quietly. As the spotlight shined on 3J, who was seated in the judges’ table, Jeff continued his speech slowly.
[This place, which at first seemed so full that there was no space to step on each other, is now quite secluded. Maybe today will pass and tomorrow will pass. However, not all of you will enjoy that spaciousness. ]
[I would like to say that you did a great job coming this far, but you should already know enough that the road to go is longer than the road you have walked. ]
[And today, maybe you’ll probably take it one step further. ]
[I want you to remember that no matter which way you walk, in the end, a step is a step. you moved So even if you don’t get the results you want today, don’t feel left behind. It’s just walking a different path. And the treasure may be waiting for you on your way. ]
Jayden got the word.
[Today’s topic is Brahms. classic romantic. He is said to have disliked this expression, but nonetheless, nothing seems to characterize him more clearly than this expression. ]
[Today, through the sound of Brahms, you have to express the boundaries between classics and romance, and the colors each of them has. ]
[ You shouldn’t be satisfied with just following the notes and instructions. ]
[ You must read the instructions that are not written on the sheet music. ]
[You have to read the story Brahms was trying to tell. ]
[Someone already knows what he’s going to say. ]
Rowoon listened to each and every one of their words. It was something he always thought about. It is to properly capture the intention of the original songwriter. More than what is contained in the sheet music, counting all the things they haven’t written yet.
‘I’m confident.’
Today, Rowoon’s intention was to express not only what they hadn’t written before, but also what he added on top of the sheet music. And I was sure that the story he added would be just as beautiful as Brahms’s. No, it’s not just beautiful. It had something in common with Brahms’ story. It’s not too awkward to put the two together.
Rowoon looked at Rami for a moment. Her face, which was made up with more care than usual, was honestly pretty no matter where you looked. He’s such a pretty person, to the point where it’s even weirder not to like him.
From noble mtl dot com
I get anxious. The bigger she gets in his world, the smaller he gets. Size is always relative.
And when I look at Rami, who has grown so much, when I look at her back, which has grown so much that I can’t even contain it with my two eyes, I just suddenly felt that kind of anxiety. Oh yeah. I don’t think there’s anything I can do but watch like this forever. I don’t think I can hold a person who is too difficult to even see in my arms. That’s normal. that’s the reality
Should I describe it as a sense of defeat? No, it wasn’t such a negative feeling for something like that. It was a beautifully carved resignation. The heat of the sculptor’s hands remains, and it’s not particularly cold even if you hold it in your chest.
I wanted to play it. Shabby and ugly love affair. His own beauty that can shine more because he is shabby and ugly.
[Now, then who will fill the first button of the day? ]
Jennifer asked. Previously, people raised their hands, you and I, but this time it was different. It was because everyone realized that it was not the best to go ahead and show confidence. Rather than looking like that, the most important thing was to find stability in the heart right away.
That’s why it was even more ironic. The first person to raise his hand was probably the person with the most unstable mind.
[ Eric. Are you supporting? ]
“yes.”
Eric nodded.
“I will leave.”
Everyone looked at Eric with strange expressions. There was no one who didn’t know about Eric’s confession to Rami at this moment. And that he didn’t get a good answer.
In that situation, why would you go on stage first? Is your mentality good, or is it rather weak?
The answer would soon be known. More interested eyes than ever followed Eric’s back. Among them was Rowoon’s gaze. What is Eric thinking? He, who has not been able to show such good results as usual, will impulsively go on stage and show what kind of performance he will perform in such an unstable state.
‘Eric······.’
They would be rivals if they were rivals, but Rowoon sincerely hoped for Eric’s success. I hoped he would show a proper performance. Sometimes their minds wander away from the piano, but in the end, their feet always have to stand in front of the piano to keep their balance.
‘show me.’
That he is also a pianist.
That he is an artist who can replace even scars with music.
The wind wouldn’t have reached Eric. Rowoon’s voice wouldn’t have resonated in Eric’s head. Nevertheless, Eric looked at the piano with a strange expression on his face for a moment. As if the piano had spoken to him.
A resigned, tired, bitter, pitiful, sorrowful smile passes by.
And then, Eric’s breakup begins.
＜ Two Hearts (11) ＞ End
＜ Two Hearts (12) ＞
‘······oh.’
Brahms, 6 pieces. 2 of them. Intermezzo (Intermezzo) in A major.
melancholy tune. A feeling of being lost. Indeed, it was a song that suited Eric’s current situation.
‘you’re good.’
He must not have been so comfortable, but he must have suffered mentally, but Eric’s fingers were still chasing the keys like tenacity, expressing the sound of Brahms quite well, no, rather, to the point where it felt desperate.
Of course. He may have been a little overshadowed by the monsters Rowoon, Heather, and Jungwoo, but Eric is by no means an easygoing pianist. In any case, he is a student with enough skills to represent the conservatory.
“It’s fine…”
Heather nodded involuntarily. The usual Eric was unimaginably emotional.
Eric is strong in classicism. Although Brahms’ music was said to have a lot of classical colors, in the end, he was also influenced by the flow of romanticism. At that time, romanticism was the trend itself.
But despite this, Eric’s performance today was never lacking. No, on the contrary, it was the most impressive thing he had ever shown.
‘······It feels like something is out of order.’
But even that feeling was not good.
Perhaps, just like Rowoon, Eric is now facing music through music.
There was no such thing as s*xuality in his mind right now. Even the applause of the audience didn’t matter. Rami is in that seat. And now he can’t get on this stage and tell her his heart.
Even if you feel unrequited,
Sometimes, it is enough just to express a certain mind.
‘ramie.’
I remember the first time I saw her.
At the time, she was playing Brahms’ Violin Concerto in D major. The bow that moves as if tore the strings, the sweaty hair, the parched body, and the expression of the countless spectators completely immersed in the music as if they were not even in the corner of consciousness.
Yes, it was my first love. She shone with the color of first love, played with the sound of first love, and just as it did, it wedged itself deep into his heart.
From that day on, it felt like Eric’s world had shifted on its axis. Everything revolved around her. I went wherever Rami was. The course registration was also headed to a place where there was a chance to see her at least a little bit. She took a philosophy class that she wasn’t too interested in, and joined her club.
Eric always came to school early and left school late. The longer you stay at school, the more time you’ll be able to see her. The chances of encountering her will increase slightly.
— Ah, Eric. Are you at school again?
And when she recognized him like that, how warm that heart felt.
‘I have to let go now, you.’
Can not help it. I knew that we couldn’t be together forever. It was a relationship that had to be broken up at some point. The relationship between Eric and Rami, whether they are connected or separated, was bound to be one of those two from the beginning. She was said to be too big to move forward with the string attached lukewarmly. As long as she was there, Eric had no choice but to stand still.
That’s why we have to move on.
You have to cut the string.
Even knowing that, why?
Why is this moment, so heavy?
“…Eric, you were someone who could play like this.”
Jen muttered. Emil, who was by her side, answered.
“It’s probably not the time to be able to play a normal performance.”
“······Poor.”
“What is there to be sorry for?”
Emil’s voice sounded somewhat sullen, but his mouth was still smiling as he looked at Eric. He’s not yet an adult, but that’s why I got to know him better. Eric’s performance is a necessary process. Labeled as ‘adult’ without being ready, they must go through in order to become adults.
“It’s all the same.”
That’s why Eric’s current performance was like a milestone in many ways, suggesting a lot to them. It didn’t matter much whether the quality of the performance was good or not.
What music can be for musicians.
It could be a comfort, a burden, or a companion. But whatever it was, it was something they could never separate from their lives… Eric’s playing explained without words.
‘I’m not sorry. Eric.’
So, Rami felt more at ease while listening to the performance. No matter how good she was at always keeping a poker face and hiding her true feelings in an adult way, she was only twenty-one after all. My heart was used in many ways, I was annoyed, and my thoughts were complicated to that extent. It’s been almost 2 years since I’ve been with Eric.
savage Eric had to put all of those nearly two years into a performance that lasted less than five minutes. And in broadcasting, even those 5 minutes will not be captured, but will be reduced to only 1 minute or tens of seconds. And all the emotions he had built up were edited and omitted, and millions of viewers would think they understood all of Eric’s young emotions.
Still, Eric plays.
“…”
“…”
So, at some point, the audience became quiet. Although there are differences in degree, everyone understands. meaning of this play. Eric’s determination.
‘It’s a pity.’
And Jeff thought.
‘How many people can appreciate this performance?’