43 – At the End of Lies
For several minutes, Takase-senpai and I didn’t say anything.
Unable to endure the awkward silence, I looked around. Come to think of it, I don’t even know what seniors like. A school idol who is serious about athletics, and a senior admired by many. Except for being the heroine of this world and a character with the attributes of a prince.
“…… That picture.”
Eight. Be as it is.
I brought up the topic by pointing my finger.
“I came into the room earlier and saw it.”
“Huh?”
Senpai, who, like me, was sitting on the bed and kept his mouth shut, looked that way. Picture frame on the desk. The three people in the picture hung inside.
The protagonists of this world are Yuuki Yuuki, Haruna Kato, and Eri Takase.
It was their childhood.
“Ah… It’s elementary school days.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes… Back then, I lived right next door to them.”
The senior told me that it was a picture taken when we all went out together in those days.
“At that time, Haru-chan was really a crybaby.”
“Ahahahaha….”
It happened once on a date not too long ago.
Can I say that I am better than that now?
“Yuu-kun was a prankster.”
“For some reason, it doesn’t seem that much different from now.”
“I see….”
Huh, the senior laughed a little.
Okay, now we can start a little conversation.
Relieved, I relaxed my shoulders and said.
“What about seniors?”
“Huh?”
“What kind of kid were you in those days?”
“……… ….”
Eri Takase in the photo had much shorter hair than now. If you look at that picture, you can only see a boy with a somewhat picky personality.
Of course, judging from her feminine body and her grown-up appearance, Eri Takase of course was an attractive beautiful girl who could no longer be seen as a man.
“I…… She was the kind of child I wanted tied to a sack and thrown into the river.”
“Yes?”
“That means she was such a troublemaker.”
“Ahahahaha… ….”
Do you hate yourself so much when you were young?
In the photo, Eri Takase had a somewhat brusque impression. Yuuki and Haruna are smiling, but she is staring straight ahead with an expressionless expression.
“Hot-tempered… A lot of anger… If Yuu-kun was a prankster, I was a kid who only had accidents.”
“……… That is scary.”
“Now I am reformed and I am working hard… If I say that, will the manager believe me?”
The senior tilted her head and said.
“I’ve never seen anyone who lives harder than my seniors.”
“I thought the same thing when I saw the manager.”
The sound of me and her gentle laughter rises.
At the same time, the senior spoke in a low voice.
“…… Yesterday’s work… I’m sorry.”
“Yes?”
“I… I always apologize to you.”
“Ah….”
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As her mood eased slightly, the senior handed her an apology as if he had been waiting for that timing.
No, I couldn’t come to a conclusion on how to accept it either.
“I guess I’m the type of person who shouldn’t drink alcohol.”
“…… Really.”
“hahahaha….”
The senior’s dry laughter spreads.
“I will never make that mistake again when I am drunk. Therefore… I want you to forgive me for yesterday.”
“……… ….”
Alcohol… Ira.
Anyway, she seemed to be attributing the cause of yesterday’s incident to that.
Because she was drunk. She didn’t mix her own feelings with it at all.
Is that what it means?
When I looked up, the senior was across from me. With her on her knees.
“It would be meaningless just to say it in words. It’s already the second.”
“Seo, senior?”
Putting his hands on both of her knees, the senior tried to bend her body.
“Oh, no… wait for a sec… This is burdensome.”
“I can’t help it. I force you… Because he was going to do something like that.”
I shouted, approaching her and stopping her. She raised her head and her eyes met while stopping her senior who seemed to be able to do it if she left her like this.
“……… Eww… It’s okay.”
In the immediate vicinity.
The senior turned her head away and avoided her eyes.
“……… If Sayoko hadn’t stopped it then… I would have kissed you.”
“I must have…” The senior’s expression at that time… Because I was scared.”
She barely sat facing her true to her away from her.
First of all, there were certain things to do.
“Senior… Please be honest.”
“What… I mean.”
“……… ….”
… If you ask for an honest answer, I must ask sincerely.
However, this took courage.
At the same time, I thought that there was only now… Driven by the desire to resolve this relationship quickly before Haruna and Yuuki arrive, I opened my mouth.
“To me…… Do you have a heart?”
I flinched and her shoulders trembled.
The senior’s hands were shaking as she turned her head away from me.
“I only knew that it was like that since yesterday. Because… At that time, the appearance of the senior….”
Because it was different from before.
It looked like it was angry, or it looked like it was pouring out resentment. She hit the wall and drove me away, holding her chin and sticking her head out.
As if the heart that had been suppressed for so long exploded and became out of control.
That guess is my mistake. If it’s just a mistake… I rather wished so.
Because I will have to endure the embarrassment alone.
“Because you looked sincere… So please tell me.”
“Keugh….”
“At that time, the senior’s heart… Were you serious?”
Whatever the outcome, I have to make sure.
Hiding, hiding, pretending not to know and moving on is not good for each other. That was a shortcut that led the story to catastrophe.
“I… I am… ….”
The senior managed to turn her head to look at her in my direction.
And then…….
***
Emotions run wild.
I’ve never liked anyone before.
There is not a single man who has entered my heart.
I had never even imagined myself confessing to someone.
So at this moment… This situation, where they were forced to convey their honest feelings, was the greatest crisis.
But that’s not the manager’s fault.
I made a mistake.
As he said, it is not something that can be solved by just bowing down with an apology.
I have to tell you… Express your honest feelings… You have to tie a knot.
Because that’s the only way we can continue our relationship.
I barely moved his eyes to look at him.
Manager-kun looked extremely resolute. I felt the determination that if I had a serious heart-to-heart conflict, he too would openly tell himself.
The manager doesn’t avoid it.
Then the only thing left is my decision.
“Tell me… Was your heart sincere at that time?”
I raised my head.
I have no choice but to tell you now.
If I say I like it, the manager will take it as seriously as they can.
……… Accept?
No… Accepting is… It couldn’t be.
He has a girlfriend.
I…… Rejected.
If I honestly confess… He wholeheartedly refuses it.
The answer was fixed.
When I realized that, my heart started pounding and beating.
As soon as he realized the outcome of that decision and the future to come, he felt his chest tighten.
I can’t breathe properly. Breathing becomes rough
I don’t want to be rejected.
I don’t want to see him shake his head.
I don’t want to be pushed away.
I…… I am……….
“Manager-kun… ….”
“Yes.”
He licked his trembling lips and recited the words that came to his mind at that moment.
“That can’t be…… Isn’t it?”
My heart was beating wildly.
I could tell myself that my face was red.
What is a prince?
The image of me that they longed for was all an illusion to me at this moment.
If everyone sees me like this, they will surely get fed up and leave.
“I…… I’ve never liked anyone before.”
“Yes.”
“Of course, I am talking about a rational crush.”
If you say one word, the next one comes out smoothly.
Am I the kind of person who is so good at lying?
To the point where you get tired of yourself.
“The only thing I realized through this opportunity was my determination to stop drinking.”
No… That’s not it.
“Sorry for the misunderstanding.”
“……… Yes.”
The curtain comes down and closes.
My life has been living as if I was acting on stage, deceiving myself. The way the door in Act 1 closes.
“I don’t like you.”
“……… ….”
The manager listened calmly to my lies with his head down.
There was only silence in the room.
Then he raised his head and scratched the back of his neck, raising the corner of his mouth.
“What… I was completely self-conscious.”
“Ah… ….”
“I’m sorry, senpai.”
“No, because I made a mistake.”
At that moment, I heard a creaking sound coming up the stairs.
“What are you doing… ? Let’s go in.”
“Ah… ! Huh… !”
I heard the voices of Yuu-kun and Haru-chan from close by.
The door opens and they enter.
“Everyone waited a long time~! I bought a lot of snacks and drinks!”
Yuu-kun shouted lively and showed the heavy bag in his hand.
Haru-chan picked up tableware and cups and put them down with a smile.
“But what is the atmosphere like? What were you two doing before we came?”
“I didn’t do anything. Where is the landlord who leaves the guest alone?”
The manager gets up and throws a scolding at him.
Haru-chan moves busily, taking out drinks and snacks.
“You. Could it be that you weren’t that close with Eri-nee, so it was really awkward?”
“No. I’m thirsty, so give me a drink quickly.”
“Look at this. I must have burned my neck because it was awkward.”
While they were talking without seeing each other, Haru-chan handed me a can of coffee.
“Is this your sister?”
“Yes… thanks.”
Haru-chan didn’t care about them, and he organized his bags and gathered them in one place.
Coincidentally, they came in just as the conversation between me and the manager ended. For me, it was a good moment to calm myself down.
Take a small deep breath.
This is it.
If I was rejected by the manager… Obviously, our relationship would have become uncomfortable.
If the relationship between the captain and the manager is not good, it will definitely affect club activities.
Managers who feel uncomfortable dealing with me may leave the track and field team.
He was already a member loved by everyone.
I can’t let him go by mistake.
Our relationship continues.
And also the scenery where Yuu-kun and Haru-chan are together.
If I hadn’t rushed to convey my feelings, we wouldn’t be able to gather like this anymore.
So obviously…… This is a good thing.
Do self-justification.
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If I don’t do that, I can’t protect myself.
Afraid of losing him.
I started acting again.