99 – Third-rate play – 8
“I’m pretty sure I’m getting it.”
Hestia nodded at Seol-ah’s words.
“I’m sorry I didn’t explain in advance. But I also realized it during the interrogation, so I couldn’t help it.”
“No, I’m sorry for reminding you of painful memories.”
Hestia snapped her fingers as she said that. A pure white light emanated from her fingertips like a thread. The light surrounded Lisa’s body, who was biting her fingernails with her blank eyes, still confused. Lisa continued to chew her nails whether or not her own body was restrained. She didn’t know what kind of connection there was between her and Wilhelm, but the fact that she was betrayed seemed to be quite a shock.
“That’s it, and we have to restrain it first. I’m sure she’s at least unstoppable.”
“Do as you please.”
As if in desperation, Lisa did not show any resistance. Hestia, who had bound Lisa tightly with her magic, turned to me.
“Now, Mikhail?”
“Huh? Me?”
“You said earlier that you would explain everything, right?”
She sure did say that. I don’t know what Seol-ah is thinking, but she’s not the kind of person who would do that for no reason, so I said it in the sense that I’ll have to explain it later. So, since Seol-ah explained everything to her, isn’t it over?
“Yes. So Miss Lily explained everything.”
“No, not why Miss Lily acted that way. I want to hear what the hell Mikhail was hiding from me.”
What am I hiding? Hestia grinned at me as I raised her question mark above her head without knowing her reason. That smile was full of her mischief, but on the other hand, it also contained something creepy, as if telling her not to think about escaping.
“Surely Mikhail was like that. It explains ‘everything’. Not only does Miss Lily act the way she does, but she also explains everything Mikhail is hiding.”
“Such a pun….”
It’s not fair to call it a pun. Wouldn’t this be more like a one-sided rant?
“Right. It’s a pun. But, Mikhail, is it really not possible? Do you know what I was thinking as I continued to listen to that person’s bullsh*t, tied hand and foot? Maybe that person’s words are true, maybe that’s the secret Mikhail is trying to hide from me.”
At Hestia’s words, I looked at her blankly at her, losing her words to do her. I never thought her vague words could have such a huge impact on her.
“Of course I know. There’s no law saying there shouldn’t be secrets between friends and lovers. It’s just, I’m just using a swarm. I want to hear what Mikhail is hiding from me, even with such a swarm. I know what I’m saying is contradictory, but still… !”
“Hestia, it’s okay. I’ll tell you.”
Hestia’s way of speaking was so emotional that she couldn’t recall her usual appearance. She was also contradictory, as she said. Even though she knew, she didn’t expect to hear from her what she was saying to her. But on the flip side, it was more persuasive because of it.
In other words, it feels like a normally calm child suddenly making a fuss about wanting a toy? If your child rolled around crying every time he went to the mart, asking you to buy a toy, you would live here for the rest of your life and Dad would go home. If it were me, she would have pretended not to win and she would have just bought it.
“Really?”
“Yes. Really.”
When Hestia said that I would be more willing to tell her secret than she thought, she looked quite surprised and opened her eyes wide and asked back. She would have confided in it a long time ago if she hadn’t been kidnapped in the first place. Of course, amnesia is a new setting. Wasn’t it the first time she went out to find her, and tried to tell her everything and ask for her apology?
“Hey, is this a good story for me to hear?”
“Mikhail, that….”
“It’s okay. Even if Cordelia listens.”
Cordelia fidgeted like a hungry dog, and she finally spoke. From Cordelia’s point of view, it is embarrassing to bring up an important secret story in front of everyone so that the two of them, who were usually so close, had a big fight. Of course, she’s me. She had no reason to hide from Cordelia, so she coolly allowed it. Rather, she thought that if Cordelia had not been here, she would have said otherwise.
I stuttered and started reciting the script I had thought of beforehand.
“Hmm, where should I start talking? Hestia, what kind of person was the Mikhail you knew before last year?”
I said to Hestia, who tilted her head as if she was saying something out of the blue.
“Because simple is fine. Be honest.”
“Last year….”
Hestia’s face hardened at the words of last year’s country. Maybe it was a memory she didn’t really want to recall. Last year’s Mikhail, who remains in her memory, is not ‘me’, but the original owner of this body. A person who is ruthless, has little emotion, and is like a doll.
I’ve never met him in person, but if the evaluation of people around me is this extreme, then I have no choice but to know. Everyone who knew me before didn’t have very good feelings for me. How can a human who has become nothing but bad luck?
“Reticent… person? Concentrating on his own work….”
“If it’s hard, it’s okay not to squeeze more. Does that mean that you were a person who didn’t talk too much and didn’t care about others?”
Hestia picked out words that I wouldn’t feel offended after thinking about it for quite some time and described me. Of course, those words are synonymous with my lack of sociability and sociability, and my lack of speech to the point of being mute. Her packaging skills were admirable.
“Kuhup!”
“Yeah, I didn’t mean that.”
Hestia held out her hand and shook it, expressing a strong denial. Cordelia and Seol-ah held back the laughter that burst out at this skit. In my simulation, it was a bit more serious than this, though. I decided to get straight to the point.
“I will tell you directly. The Mikhail that Hestia originally knew and I are different people.”
“Yes? What does that mean?”
“It’s not like a metaphor of something, it’s a real different person.”
Hestia, as well as Cordelia, who had been holding back her laughter until just a moment ago, frowned, as if not understanding what I meant. I decided to add a little bit of explanation to make it easier to understand.
“There are people who have completely lost their previous memories. I can’t remember what kind of person I was, who I was close to, what I liked, and what I thought about my life. Then, can the person who lost memory and the person before losing memory be the same person?”
There is a difficult problem called Theseus’ ship. When an old ship is repaired by replacing it with new boards whenever it falls, can the ship with all the boards replaced be the same as the original ship? This is not an easy question to answer. So it’s a challenge.
Hestia’s face, which had been laughing awkwardly, hardened. She must have sensed what I meant. Hestia’s eyes shook violently.
“Mikhail, can you tell me that what I’m thinking is a lie?”
“Unfortunately, that is probably the correct answer. “
“Then no way…”
“Yes. When I woke up in the morning, I couldn’t remember anything from before.”
“Since when?!”
She slammed her desk and got up from her seat. She seemed very confused about the situation, and her usual calm was gone, and she was in a very excited state. Exactly, he looked anxious.
“We met before entering the academy. Three days before that day.”
As Hestia searched for her memories, she recalled the events of the day. She will soon realize the truth of what I said, since the moment I said coincided with the moment when the Mikhail she knew changed. Then she slumped back into her seat with her dejected expression on her face. No, the expression collapsed would be more appropriate for her than sitting down. She put her head on her table and giggled, like someone out of her mind.
“So you mean that the current Mikhail is a completely different person from the Mikhail before?”
“If you say so, it will be.”
In the end, this is just a pun, but it is true that he has no memories of the past, and it is also true that he is a completely different person from Mikhail before that. In Hestia’s head, it must have been the feeling of puzzles scattered here and there being put together.
The sudden change in people, the lack of special likes and dislikes, and the occasional awkward appearance can all be explained with this.
“Is it okay if I ask a question?”
“Any amount.”
Hestia raised her head again. She still couldn’t erase her doubts from her half-doubtful gaze at me. It’s rather strange to believe it right away when someone who’s been with you for almost half a year suddenly says something like memory loss.
“If you don’t have any memories of the past, the first time you met me that day, right?”
“Yes.”
“Then why… ? Why did you listen to everything I said in such a low-key manner when a person you’ve never met is so rude? Why did you propose to take classes with me?”
Certainly, when we first met Hestia, Hestia was a little ticklish. I even tried to push it unilaterally. It’s still a memory even though it’s only been half a year. It seems that she had been thinking of it as something similar to Mikhail’s changed apology gesture.
I scratched my neck because I was embarrassed to tell the truth.
“Don’t listen and laugh. It was love at first sight. If such a pretty person is my fiancé, I want to look good….”
At my answer, Seol-ah and Cordelia’s eyes were stained with astonishment. I couldn’t bear to see Hestia’s face.
I paused and lowered her head. I felt like I would die of awkwardness if I even met her eyes with Hestia. The ear lobe is warm and hot. I know there is not much demand for men to be shy, but I couldn’t bear to keep my head up.
Hestia, too, put her head back on the table and trembled, probably ashamed to hear these words in front of her. I changed the topic to somehow turn the awkward atmosphere around.
“I’m sorry I hid it for a while. Mikhail and I, whom Hestia knew so far, are different people, and in a way, I couldn’t find the courage to say it, thinking that I had taken that person’s place. But Hestia, if she knew you would go through so much trouble with my secret, she would have just revealed it a long time ago.”
Hestia’s tremors intensified. As soon as I finished speaking, she was shaking her shoulders.
I was taken aback. That’s not the gesture of someone who’s ashamed. Are you angry? Did I fan the house on fire? It’s not that I wasn’t prepared to be hated at all. Still, to be honest, I was a little afraid. What if this changes the way she treats me? You can’t hide it forever, so as Seol-ah said, he hid lies in the truth and covered it up with an appropriately made-up story.
I was determined that we might become distant, but I think it would be quite a shock if I really became distant from Hestia over this. It will take a long time to recover.
“Hestia? Are you angry?”
I took a peek at Hestia’s face with the softest possible expression and expression.
“Huh, huh. aaang!”
She was very sad, sobbing, with tears dripping like chicken droppings.
Why not?