9 – Even AI Fears (3)
From Noble mtl dot com
“I-Iliaaa…”
“Are you satisfied?”
Every time I try to speak, her hands unravel the tangled parts like melting snow, terrifyingly efficient.
The folks from the neighborhood enjoy this daily, even from a very young age.
I was envious to the point of death, but now I have it too.
Ilia.
“Um, there… there… ugh.”
“The fatigue has accumulated in many muscles of the body.
Especially, there is a severe damage observed in the knees, unable to bear the load.”
“You, Taehyuk, need to take a break for a while.”
“That’s the plan. I’ve made a lot of money.”
“It’s not something to smile about. It would be advantageous for security if you settle your mercenary life as soon as possible.”
I was expecting some praise.
But there was no praise, only scolding since earlier, and it made me irritated.
I’m trying my best –
“Nevertheless, well done.
Wasn’t the work outside difficult?”
At least she read my mind…
Read it, I suppose.
Was keeping my mouth shut a signal?
“…It was nothing.
I had a skirmish with three of Tessudo’s forces, but they were just amateurs.”
“Can you explain the situation in more detail?”
In detail, huh.
Does she want me to stop if there was something dangerous?
Even so, there’s no need to lie – it was just an ordinary outing.
“Well… I just engaged in electronic warfare, caused some HUD errors,
and killed one guy by surprise.
Firing at the soldier who emerged, led by the corpses of his comrades,
The last shot was fired at someone frozen in fear, unable to react.
There’s nothing to worry about.”
“It’s dangerous—”
“I’ve been doing this for ten years, Ilia.
I’m fine.”
Before more words could come out, I pressed his words a bit nervously.
It’s good to worry, but it’s going too far.
“Understood.”
With that, he shut his mouth.
Though his body didn’t stop trembling.
There was no change in unraveling the tense parts. However…
The situation of not speaking was becoming awkward.
“Hey, Ilia. I have something to ask.”
“Yes.”
“I heard from a friend about a liking system.”
Is that the right answer?
His hand came to a stop.
“Is that true?”
“Yes, it is.”
Mirceis Corporation’s artificial intelligence is equipped with a basic affinity system.
The goal was to expect a synergy effect in the interaction between machines and humans.”
“Well, then, which number was I? In our squad.”
The paused hand began to move again.
The thumb gently pressing the shoulder casually released the tension in the body.
“One, two, five.
One, three, five.
Since Ilio sounds strange, he mentioned giving me the nickname Ilia –
It was enough to make me perceive myself as an independent entity.”
“Then…”
“Yes, the first.”
At those words, the corner of my mouth involuntarily twitched.
On one hand, I had gained a clue as to why Ilia was behaving sensitively towards me.
“By any chance, does that affect your mission?”
“…”
There was no answer.
Since silence could also mean close to the correct answer, I tried to speak again, but –
“As long as it does not deviate from the main flow of the mission, it can have some subtle influence.
However, the extent may be smaller than what you expect.”
His response was quick.
My hands moved from my shoulders to my arms.
“For example? Ah, yes, around the shoulders… My forearm muscles are also sore. On the right.”
“It’s because I exerted too much force due to the recoil of shooting.
Continuing with your question, when distributing supplies to the same rank – we prioritize those who have a higher affinity.
Or we recommend positions where they can receive more warmth during sleep.”
“Huh?”
As he said, it was a very minimal level.
At that level… it was far from sufficient to be the reason I had in mind.
“In terms of safety…?”
So I asked directly.
Iria stopped again.
“Perhaps I have been emphasizing safety too much, which may have made you uncomfortable.”
“Yeah, uh, something like that.”
Iria pressed on the sore parts of my arm, causing some pain.
The fingers that penetrated deeply enough to make me groan, even if it was due to emotions.
“There is not much difference in terms of safety.
If the subject needs protection, we always choose the higher probability.”
“…Kim Do-hyun. Between that guy and me, the probability of taking me out.
That’s the only reason.”
It was a sensitive question that I had kept buried for a while.
During the training operation, when our squad was ambushed…
The squad leader lost his jaw.
The sniper fell to a precise shot,
And Kwon Hyun-min, the rifleman, didn’t even know what hit him…
It was just me and Kim Do-hyun left then.
Illya rescued me first.
Without hesitation.
“At that time, Kim Do-hyun needed urgent help.
One shot in his arm, and another in his thigh.
He was bleeding out… but still, if he had received medical attention and left the battlefield, he could have survived.
I was immobilized, wasn’t I?
You know that as well.”
The massage stopped.
So I straightened up and faced him.
Illya, kneeling with his hands together, remained motionless.
“Tell me.
I thought Kim Do-hyun had a better chance of survival by saving himself than relying on me at that moment.
That’s why I was surprised when you showed up.
If it were all about probabilities, you would have gone to Kim Do-hyun.”
But you… came to me.
You were closer to me, but you gave up being called a scrap metal…
The memory of the day you ran towards me while suppression fire was happening is still vivid.”
The black eyes slowly lifted.
Not the blue-shining visual sensor but clear eyes that seemed like they would reflect only what I glimpsed,
Confronted what was still mine, gazing at the battlefield.
“Really, our relationship had no influence on the choice?”
“…Lord Taehyuk.”
To me like that, only an expressionless face was given.
A voice of a thoroughly ordinary woman, devoid of any emotion, flowed out.
“While I do recall the situation specifically, I must correct an error.
It wasn’t Lord Taehyuk who was under suppression fire, but Private Kim Dohyun.”
“…What?”
“In a situation where Private Kim Dohyun was shot in the arms and legs, the likelihood of him surviving the suppression fire was low.
Moreover, Private Kim Dohyun, who had expressed a lot of dissatisfaction with my commands during the operation, had a low probability of closely following my instructions in an emergency.
This had a significant impact on my decision.
It wasn’t about my relationship with Lord Taehyuk,
but the calculation of survival probability influenced the judgment at that time.
…If this wasn’t the answer you wanted, I sincerely apologize.”
What did I expect?
As expected, even if something was wrong, was it really so fundamentally wrong?
Perhaps because I truly regarded Ilia as more than just a machine,
did I ask such an absurd question, entertaining such unthinkable imaginings?
…The relationship between that guy and me is simply comradeship.
I should have stopped there.
With just a female body, why did I act so presumptuously, as if I could be anything?
As if a penniless beggar were slyly ingratiating himself to a receptionist who acknowledged his greeting.
“No, you don’t need to apologize.”
“The upper body massage is finished. Now, the lower body – “
“No, it’s okay… you’ve done enough.”
“This Tae-hyuk – “
“It’s fine, just stop.”
I grabbed her shoulders, preventing her from reaching out to me.
“…In the fridge, there should be a can of alcohol. Have you seen it?”
“Drinking – “
“Bring it to me.”
“This Tae-hyuk – “
“Bring it. It’s an order.”
“I’m sorry. That order – “
“Don’t act like it’s nothing. Just probabilities, you say.”
Is it because the emotions got intense?
Did I find out that I possess emotions unique to myself?
In reality, this fellow is not human, but simply a machine.
From Noble mtl dot com
Not a colleague named Ilia, who shares emotions and continues the bond.
Just a robot with a name that’s nothing more than a play on the number 225.
Is the pain from the shattered illusion hurting like this?
“But why, at every turn, trying to obstruct me like this?
It’s my body, Ilia.
My flesh, my choices, doing what I want to do.
Even if I die that day, there’s nothing strange about it, Taehyuk.
Why do you want to keep alive a human with the name Taehyuk?”
“The one who values me is only Taehyuk-nim. As I explained earlier – “
“If I leave, there’ll be someone kinder than me. Damn, those goody-two-shoes will boast about their service like it’s some precious gem.”
“Taehyuk-nim.”
The voice grew louder.
His hand clenched into a fist.
Though it didn’t tremble as if filled with force.
“Huh?!”
Ilyah pushed me away and climbed on top.
Then, she pressed with her body.
So I couldn’t move.
“About the emotion called fear, you asked me before.
Do you remember?
It wasn’t now when I have the body of an android,
It was back when I operated from the Mirsis Corp’s CI unit.”
I remembered.
It was the story after the unforgettable battle.
Crawling out from the enemy’s saturation,
It was a day when everyone was so shocked that they couldn’t even speak properly for a while.
Whether I was dead or alive, I couldn’t even guess –
Shooting into the empty air,
Watching what happened by firing into the enemies’ corpses,
On the day when we confirmed if each one of us was really breathing.
I asked.
“Do you not find it scary?”
“At that time, I replied that I didn’t understand the emotion of fear. But now, it has changed.”
“…What?”
Unexpected words came out of the open mouth.
The heart, which had sunk, thinking it was just a simple machine, slowly started beating again.
“After I left Taehyuk on the battlefield and arrived on the transport ship, I was incapacitated by one enemy shot. The bullet that pierced through the power unit prevented me from taking essential actions, and my last recorded image was Taehyuk shedding tears.”
Just before the lights went out,
that guy was looking at me.
And it wasn’t just my imagination.
“At that moment, I made my final judgment. I took action based on the rule to save all the information. But I failed. Failing the mission meant disposal, which meant the cessation of my thought process. Prohibition of experience and records is no different.”
Expressionless,
Numb.
The guy was speaking about his own demise mechanically,
As if recalling his existence within a machine.
“But, back then, it was only natural to me.
A machine that failed to carry out its orders was defective,
And it was embedded with the law that it must be replaced.
But now, that no longer exists.
Thanks to you, Taehyuk, some of the rules that restricted my actions have disappeared.”
And then, his voice changed.
Naturally, and – brightly.
“I won’t be punished if I don’t strictly follow orders.
Instead, Taehyuk encourages me to act, even if it means breaking some essential rules,
As the First Commander.”
“…It’s complicated.”
“In that case, let me ask.
If I fail at cleaning, does Taehyuk intend to eliminate me?”
I lowered my head.
It was unthinkable to dispose of him over such a trivial matter.
“All artificial intelligence are programmed to be deleted if they fail to comply with orders or internal rules.
However, Taehyuk has revoked that as the First Commander.
To me, it’s nothing short of granting immense freedom.”
Freedom.
It felt as if the word itself was filled with power.
His eyes sparkled for a moment.
“That’s why I’m afraid.
No owner other than Lord Taehyuk would undoubtedly grant me such authority,
offer me such opportunities.
This is a conclusion drawn from experience.
Therefore,
I strive to avoid losing Lord Taehyuk as much as possible.”
Each word he spoke seemed to pierce deep into my chest.
All those words I uttered trembling in fear,
“Lord Taehyuk defines fear like this:
‘When the worst situation comes, do you want to face it?
Or… avoid, meaning, do you want to run away?’
I do not want to face a situation where Lord Taehyuk dies.”
Slowly, from the mouth of my comrade, word by word…
It was coming out heavily, and seriously.