205 – ending-3
It’s stuffy. There is no way out. It is frustrating.
Having defeated Nerwen, Celia, and even that Eleanor, I couldn’t overcome Farseer, who had no fighting spirit.
He subdued the wandering elf, gave the way to the saintess who was drowning in guilt, and destroyed the knight who did not break his conviction with stronger power.
But Farseer was different. What she was carrying on her back wasn’t the kind of thing I could get over.
“I’m sorry.”
There was no hostility in those eyes.
“Your will… I still don’t understand, but I respect you. Your mercy, forgiving us even like this.”
“It’s not forgiveness! Shit, I’ll torment you dozens and dozens of times more in the future… You’re saying just leave your life behind!”
“Haa… I see. I’m sorry. As you get older, your notions harden and it seems that you can’t see the world as it is.”
The one who got excited was me. I was also the one who inflamed the hostility.
Farseer was looking down at me with sad eyes, without any regrets.
“Thank you.”
Filled with frustration, I reacted sharply to her words.
“In this situation?”
“When I realized who I was… I thought that no one would mourn my death.”
“Okay.”
I was a bit skeptical of that opinion.
No one may have had human interaction with her. I wasn’t familiar with Farseer’s life, so I can’t accurately judge.
If it was Farseer, he would have hidden his true feelings from anyone. And, you may have felt lonely because there was no one to talk about it openly.
“My grandparents truly loved me.”
“…”
“That’s why, I was afraid of them dying. I mourned their disappearance, their eternal separation.”
It felt like her life was contained in every word Farseer said.
As if she was trying to get rid of all the lingering lingering feelings in her life, she vomited out words slowly but incessantly.
“But could I really be that kind of person to someone…”
“Am I here invisible? Dragon’s eyes, I guess my eyesight isn’t as good as I thought?”
Still, it felt bad to be ignored. I didn’t want her to die, neither did I.
“That’s Enerel. You’re overly merciful…”
“It’s not just me. Aren’t you misunderstanding something? After living for hundreds of years, don’t you see people you’ve been dating for a few months as human relationships?”
It’s meaningless.
Even if I try to argue with Farseer here, nothing will change.
But for her to speak casually with a detached face was more unbearable than anything else.
“Do you know how resentful I was for the wizard outside when I killed you at your secret base?”
If she had enough strength, it was the look in her eyes that wouldn’t be strange even if she tried to kill me on the spot.
“That wizard… was just interested. Because he had talent. Well, now that I think about it, that was a bit stupid.”
In the end, I couldn’t keep my promise to her.
“Do you remember those people you cast transformation magic on? The furry gentlemen… I was worried, but they seem to be living well in their own way. I remembered you.”
“Ah, they were, yes. useful… um. this is not good. To say such a thing when I have learned from you not to divide people into useless and useless.”
Perhaps, what Farseer gave them was ‘meaningless’.
“But, well… people change so easily. Just go over it gently.”
“…I didn’t say anything.”
Somehow, I was hoping she would tell me she wanted to live.
It seemed that Farsi would be able to find the answer. Even in the face of an unreasonable and absolute death, I felt like I could find an answer.
“They didn’t resent you.”
“It was just meaningless kindness. There was no sincerity in it, it just coincided with my interests and theirs.”
Maybe.
It was no wonder that her kindness and gifts to them did not contain Farsi’s goodwill, just as her contempt and indifference to me did not contain malice.
“Still, those people… will be sad. Because of you. Because of you dying.”
But their hearts were not lying. Just as I exacted vengeance on Farseer for her innocent contempt, there were those who wished her alive for her unfavorable kindness.
Farseer cautiously nodded.
The way the lying dragon nodded was distinctly different from that of a human. I felt a sense of alienation, as if showing that the Farseer was a different creature from me.
“Thanks to you, I might be able to leave the end peacefully. Thank you.
“Do it in moderation and wake up!”
“But it is.”
Every time I made eye contact with her, I felt a tingling sensation all over my body.
It’s not horror. It is a sigh. It is a reflection.
As if a child who had been forced to do whatever he wanted met the eyes of his parents who were looking at him with cold eyes.
“Was it that forcible for me to die?”
“What…”
“He lived hundreds of years. Expensive magic ingredients like water, wasting this superior intelligence that would have brought more happiness to the world had it been used in a way other than eternal life.”
“Farse…”
“It’s just going back to normal. I’m releasing this life that I’ve been forcibly holding on to for my desires and dreams.”
Maybe, she was right.
You may be deceived by that small and young appearance. Her mind may have already worn out over the years.
“Many people die. And… those who remain suffer the pain of parting. It’s only natural.”
Farseer calmly acknowledged her death, as if he were talking about someone else.
“I really hated taking it for granted… but now it won’t be something I won’t be able to admit.”
As if reciting the last words, he continued to speak so softly that it was hard to believe that it was the voice of that gigantic dragon.
“I am a person forced to live, not a person who deserves to be alive. There is no value or reason to be.”
I can not admit it.
The fact that she died peacefully like this, I didn’t want to understand.
“…no.”
“If you’re not rude, will you please cut my throat?”
“no.”
“It’s not bad for you either. There aren’t many beings who can tell this body apart from a real dragon.”
“whatever.”
“Didn’t you decide to stay here? There won’t be anything bad because of the achievements. If you take the head of this body with you, it will be useful in its own way.”
I shook my head. I didn’t want to use her.
“Didn’t you say you would stay here? This world… I’d say it’s a bit harsh, but it’s going to be uncomfortable for someone like you to live in. If it’s about the size of my body, it’ll help you carry out your will.”
The Farseer’s hand, the giant dragon’s forepaw, slowly approached me.
“Take this. If it’s such a pity that you couldn’t avenge me directly, why don’t you have it stuffed somewhere?”
“Stop talking nonsense…”
But, I knew.
Farseer was comforting me with meaningless words.
As much as what she was saying, what I was holding on was meaningless.
“Never, I will never kill you again with my own hands…”
“That’s kind of sad. Because this body is a dragon, I didn’t think of a way to die.”
“…What?”
Farseer’s words dragged my mind, which was already at risk, down even further into the abyss.
“Of course I thought I would die at your hands. This body, first of all, is the body of a dragon. It cannot be torn and cut with ordinary methods.”
“that…”
“The only magic that can be used with this body is to inflict fingernail-sized wounds on my body.
I bit my lip hard.
“Rather, I thought it would be neat for you to kill me… as I originally planned.”
“I heard you can hold out for a few months. At least, until then…”
“If you want that, I’ll gladly comply. But, the time is not absolute.”
“…”
“I could go on a rampage at any moment. If I’m lucky enough to have you by my side, I’ll hurt others if the times aren’t right. Is it worth it?”
As always, I was wrong. she was right
Farseer has presented the most efficient, realistic, and right solution for everyone.
Even if she was the victim at the end, no exceptions were made.
“Yes, this is…”
I pulled out the holy sword even though I knew it was pointless.
There was no possibility. Like cutting water with a sword, it is practically impossible.
Still, I couldn’t give up like this. The desire to protect and the desire not to give up were gathered and a faint sword spirit aroused.
Even if I end up giving up, even if I end up acknowledging her death.
That wasn’t it now.
“Tell me if it hurts. For now…”
I could understand Farsi. I hated everything in this world. I didn’t even want to admit the law that a person must die.
The flames of hatred faintly enveloped my sword. I had to do everything in my power not to burn the farseer.
“As much as I can, I’ll try.”