91 – Living with You
I think I fainted a couple of times. To be honest, my memories are blurry. It was only this time that I realized that when physical fatigue reaches its extreme, it can lead to mental overwork. If I hadn’t been a person who had experienced numerous nightmares, I don’t think it would have been unreasonable for this incident to have been traumatizing.
Of course, I also enjoyed it, so I have nothing more to say. There were some parts I couldn’t remember, but it’s okay if at least Yoona had fun. Because in the memories that remain, Yoona was clearly enjoying herself.
I just hope that when I wake up the next day, I can stand up with my own strength. With that hope in mind, I let go of the last string of consciousness.
It wasn’t until late afternoon that I was able to open my eyes again.
“Ha…”
…
In the languid afternoon sunlight, the barely exhaled breath dispersed without a trace. I felt like I couldn’t get up on my own, so I grabbed the bed sheets as hard as I could, but I couldn’t get any strength into my back. I eventually gave up and laid my body down.
“Ugh…!”
The moment I lay down straight on the bed, every muscle in my body screamed. As I calmed down and took a breath, a piece of toilet paper rolled down from the side. I don’t know why, but there was a pile of used tissues on top of my head. Even without having to smell it, I felt like I knew roughly what I had cleaned.
Meanwhile, I looked around, but Yoona was nowhere to be seen. It must have already happened a long time ago. While I was looking for traces of her with my eyes, I suddenly cast my gaze to the floor. And, I found some very neatly folded clothes.
“…hahahaha.”
Because it was a somewhat familiar situation, I started laughing without realizing it. I raised my trembling arms and picked up the clothes, and a large hoodie and jeans came out. Inside, Yoona’s scent came out softly.
Even though I hadn’t washed it yet, I couldn’t just leave it off, so I put my arms inside my clothes. Every time I lifted the cloth with my hand, I smelled Yoona and somehow felt like I was being held in her arms. After struggling for a bit, I soon popped my head through the opening in the hood.
“Whoa…”
…
It’s a little…Big.
Of course, it was partly because the clothes were somewhat comfortable to wear, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that they were a bit baggy due to the basic height difference. When I lifted my hand, I saw that the sleeve of my dress was covering half of my palm.
It was as if he had been forced to wear his older brother’s clothes. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, I secretly covered my face. Of course, I had nothing to say because it was my fault because I only had one set of clothes.
I guess I’m a little short after all. I lamented and yawned profusely. Yeo Nam let her fatigue sink into her throat.
…
“…?”
At that time, I felt a sign of presence at the door. At first glance, it seemed closed, but when I looked closer, I saw something facing this way through the gap in the door. I tried my best to pretend not to notice and listened closely. Then a very small but continuous sound rang in my ears.
Click. Click.
…
Click. Click.
“…”
It didn’t take long to realize the identity of the sound. I massaged my leg, then walked towards it and opened the door.
And then I made eye contact with Yoona, who was crouching down holding her cell phone.
“Ah…”
“What are you doing?”
“Uh…That’s…”
Yuna hesitated a little, but then she smiled and blurted out a word as if she were making an excuse.
“Because you’re so cute…”
“…”
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I looked down at her, frowning at her. Yuna smiled as if she was trying to ease the situation.
“But I couldn’t bear it. I couldn’t not take a picture of you struggling in my clothes because they were too big.”
“Where did you start taking pictures?”
“…Since when I woke up?”
That means it was filmed from the beginning. I was grateful for the interest, but I still couldn’t ignore this behavior.
“Erase it. Yoona.”
“Huh? Why…Why? It was a cute picture?”
“I’m embarrassed. So please erase it.”
“But it’s the first picture. Can’t we just leave it alone? Huh?”
“If you keep doing that, I’ll take it out.”
“At least it’s the last picture of me yawning… Wait a minute!”
When I stretched out my hand, Yuna got scared and avoided her body. She then climbed onto the bed and raised her hands as high as possible.
“Please Ellen! I won’t do that next time. So just leave me this picture!”
“Next time I’ll take a picture, so please just erase it. OK?”
“I said no! I don’t think I’ll ever see a photo like this again!”
“Do you really want to keep doing this…!”
“Even if I try, I can’t reach it. How can I not catch it? Huh? Huh?”
Yoona subtly teased me and raised her arms higher. It was a shame, but no matter how much I stretched out my arms, it was a height I couldn’t reach. She later felt resentful towards her mother for giving birth to me like this.
“Yoona, don’t be like this. I don’t want to work hard in the morning.”
“Striving…It won’t reach you anyway. Why don’t we just leave it alone?”
“Ah…I’m really tired…!”
“Ugh!”
I ended up hooking my leg around Yuna’s crook and lightly knocking her down. But her body was so tired that I collapsed on top of her. We ended up all mixed up on the bed and struggling for a while to grab our phones.
“I told you to give it to me…!”
“No! Absolutely not! This is Ellen!”
“No, why is that so precious…!”
“Ugh…I will never give it to you…Never!”
Yoona’s resistance was stronger than expected. Every time I tried to reach for her phone, her thick thighs got tangled in my arms, and when I tried to twist her body away, she used her tall stature to stab my head with her chin.
“It hurts! It really hurts!”
“So please stop!”
“Absolutely not…Ugh…Almost there…!”
“No!”
Then, when I somehow stretched my arm towards her cell phone, Yuna hurriedly screamed her voice. Then he grabbed my head and hugged me tightly. Her soft scent took her breath away as her squishy breasts pressed against her face.
“Ugh…Ugh…”
“Please, just this once. Huh? Please just look at it this once.”
“Ugh…”
“Yes. Yes. He’s good. Our Ellen.”
The scent that filled her head eventually relaxed her entire body. I took a deep breath with a flushed face and eventually closed my eyes as if giving up.
“Just…Don’t post it anywhere. Just watch it alone. Understood?”
“I don’t have anywhere to post it anyway. Is it okay to print it and hang it in a frame?”
“What?”
Thinking this was a really weird joke, she raised her head and Yoona’s serious expression caught her eye. We were embarrassed to see each other’s conflicting reactions, but soon fell back on the bed, laughing helplessly. The warmth of the late-arriving sunlight gently scratched my cheek.
“So what should we do now? Do you have any plans, Yoona?”
“Well, I’m not sure. Do you want to sleep more? Aren’t you tired?”
“Yes. That’s okay.”
“Really? Then…Shall we do it one more time?”
“…”
Yoona’s fingers slowly dug into my clothes. I genuinely felt goosebumps coming out of her, and I cringed at her body without even realizing it. Then Yoona smiled softly and tapped my forehead.
“I’m just kidding. Now, wake up. Let’s eat.”
“That’s a good idea. Are you going to do it yourself?”
“No. Of course I have to order it. What should I do…”
“Order and eat.”
I quietly pondered her words. Then, suddenly, for no reason, I looked out the window. Under a very clear sky, dazzling sunlight was pouring down here. It was as if he was gently tempting us, who had been locked in our room all morning.
In the midst of that unbearable temptation, I lightly said a word.
“Yoona, don’t do that, let’s go out and eat.”
“Let’s go out?”
“Yes. I’d like to see where you live. Wouldn’t it be possible?”
“Ah…”
Even though it was an insignificant request, Yuna hesitated a little. It seemed that there was still a reluctance to go out at an instinctive level.
I met Yuna’s gaze. Only then did the fear in my eyes gradually fade away. In the end, Yuna nodded her head to me with a smile on her face.
“Okay. Let’s go out.”
“The weather is nice, isn’t it?”
“Yeah…That’s right…”
“It’s a little chilly, but I think it’s okay. Right?”
“Ugh…That’s right.”
“…What’s wrong? Does it keep getting foggy and uncomfortable?”
“No, I’m just… Touching.”
Yuna pursed her lips and adjusted her glasses once again. She’s been like this ever since she came out. Has Yoona not fully adapted to this world yet? I felt a sense of kinship in an unexpected way.
“By the way, Yoona. When did she start wearing glasses? It doesn’t seem like her eyesight is that bad.”
“That…Since I started working as an actor.”
“Why? For image management?”
“It’s the opposite. I don’t want people to recognize me when I go out.”
Yuna noticed her surroundings for no reason and put her glasses up once again. Faint sunlight slowly melted into her thick glasses.
“Originally, my mom told me to wear her sunglasses. But they actually make people notice. She bought me these after I cried and said no.”
“She had a reason to use something so big.”
“Yes. Surprisingly, a person’s impression changes a lot with just one pair of glasses. So, I started wearing these at school, and no one made a fuss and it was comfortable. From then on, I should say that I felt more stable when I wore these. I felt that way, even though I didn’t need to wear them. “I couldn’t throw it away.”
“Is that how it was in that world too?”
“Yes. She needed something to calm her mind. Yuna was a child who received a lot of attention from people, so she had a greater emotional burden…”
“…”
As soon as Yuna’s name came out, Yuna trailed off. Her sense of debt and the questions she couldn’t bear to ask seemed to be crushed inside. Even though I noticed that, I didn’t respond and just shut her up.
Instead, I held onto her hand for no reason. And then she said something that was embarrassing to her.
“How about this? Don’t you feel more stable if you do this?”
“…No. I think people are staring at me more.”
After hearing Yoona’s words, she raised her head and saw that people’s eyes were actually focused in this direction. To be more precise, it was headed towards me. Because I have an appearance that inevitably attracts people’s attention.
“Then…Shall we go home again?”
“hahahaha…”
When the question was half sincere, Yuna smiled softly. She then answered in a much more relaxed voice.
“It’s not that much, so don’t overdo it. Let’s go. I’m hungry too.”
Yuna said that and clasped her hands. She then pulled my body towards the crowd of the city.
The world still remained unchanged. People passing by let out cold breath and walked down the street with colorless steps. It was a cross-section of modern people that seemed impossible to blend in not long ago, but now I was naturally blending into the scene.
Now I walk like them, pay and ride the subway like them. Instead of looking at the bright red flyer on the telephone pole, I looked at the billboard shining on the wall of the building, then walked into the restaurant and ordered what I wanted to eat. Of course, I was a little lost because it was something I had never done before, but every time I did, Yuna giggled and helped me.
Only one person. Even with just one person, Yoona, standing next to me, so many things have changed. A life where you don’t have to worry about whether you have to steal to survive on one meal today, and where you don’t have to steal the wallets of passing children.
So, it may be a bit of an exaggeration, but what can I say?
I felt like I had become an ordinary person.
As time passed, Yuna stopped paying attention to her surroundings, and the people around her also stopped looking in this direction. They accepted this prodigal son who returned after straying to another world without any hesitation. The countless times I spent wondering if I could ever become normal made me feel like a fool.
All you have to do is blend in like this. Falling into the category of ordinary was easier than I thought.
And it seemed to be the same for Yoona as well. She was secretly surprised that she was able to come out so easily after suffering alone in her room for such a long time. In the end, all she needed was one step forward.
“…”
But there was still one more hangnail left between us that needed to be removed. It was a story I had been avoiding until now, but had to be brought up anyway.
So when I returned home and stood in front of the door, I raised my head. But before that, Yuna opened her mouth.
“…So Ellen. I have something to ask you.”
“Yes.”
“Yuna…What happened?”
In the end, I had to tell this story. Because I still feel like I am indebted to her.
After thinking about it for a while, I laid out the facts I knew.
“I stayed in that world. I found a house and a job in the village Guero introduced me to.”
“And?”
“And… He said he understood after I explained the situation. He said he understood and watched me leave until the end. That was the last time I saw him.”
“So Yuna is alone now?”
“That’s right. But I asked Guerro to keep an eye on him. He’s a good guy, so he’ll definitely do it. You know that, even if he’s a little weird, he’s a good guy.”
“Guero… That’s right. I know.”
Yuna nodded her head slowly. It seemed like he felt a little reassured by the large presence that was felt from her name. I looked at her and opened her mouth once again.
“And Yuna asked me to tell you this.”
“What?”
“I want you to tell me that I love you. I really, truly appreciate it.”
“That’s right.”
“…”
“…That’s right.”
Yoona repeated that word once again. Her words may have been meaningless, but to her who devoted herself to Yuna even to the point of giving up her life, they may have come as her salvation. Numerous emotions that I could not fathom passed through my eyes as they wandered in the empty space.
Yuna, who had been immersed in her thoughts for a long time, soon turned her head towards me and smiled softly. I smiled back, feeling as if I was being saved by that comfortable smile.
But that smile faded in an instant the moment Yuna grabbed the doorknob to enter her house.
Crash.
“…Huh?”
The door, which was obviously supposed to be closed, opened in vain the moment I turned the doorknob. We looked at each other blankly and opened our mouths. Yuna’s face turned pale in an instant.
“Uh…”
“Stand… No way!”
At that time, Yoona screamed and ran inside. I barely followed her as she stomped up the stairs. She reached her upstairs at such a fast speed and opened the door to her room without hesitation.
And then, I made eye contact with a girl who looked familiar.
“…”
“Ah…”
From Noble mtl dot com
Yoona looked shocked, but the girl just raised her head with an indifferent expression.
She looked back emotionlessly, holding a trash can in one hand. She then threw the numerous pieces of tissue paper she was holding in her other hand into her trash can.
At that moment, Yoona was shocked and rushed towards her girl.
“Oh…No, Ari!!!”
“…”
Her momentum was good, but Yuna caught her foot on the threshold and fell with a crash in front of her Ari. Her body hit the floor and it almost hurt, but she stayed on her knees and raised her head towards her daughter.
“I’ll clean it up! Huh? So don’t touch it. I’ll clean it all up…!”
“You wrote a lot.”
“…”
“Really. A lot.”
Yuna pursed her lips and then lowered her head. Then Ari suddenly turned her gaze towards me and said one word.
“But. I didn’t see any condoms.”
“…”
This time it was time for me to kneel. We knelt side by side in front of the little girl and bowed her head like a guilty person.
“Very. Looks like you’ve been doing it all day.”
“…”
“Not even using birth control. Huh?”
“…”
“He didn’t even contact me.”
“…”
Every single word pierced my entire body like a needle. I felt like I was receiving behavioral correction here that I didn’t receive in that world.
“Hey…Ariya.”
Meanwhile, Yuna mustered up her courage and raised her head. She flinched at the look in her Ari’s eyes, but finally opened her mouth.
“So…You came alone? You didn’t come with your mom or uncles, right?”
“I came alone.”
“Really? I’m glad. Then…”
“My aunt told me to look for her sister. I said I would look for her here.”
Yoona was at a loss for words. Next to him, I had no choice but to remain silent like a criminal. It felt like if I said anything, something like a whip would hit me.
“So I looked for it and found it here. There really is no solution, right?”
“But you’re the only one who knows the password here…”
“What if I had come with my aunt? What if I had called someone and opened the door to come in?”
“You…You’re not going to tell your mom though, are you? Right, Ari?”
“Ha…”
In the end, a sigh came out of her mouth. She was like a mother disciplining her childish daughter. Ari, who had been looking down at us unwaveringly, shook her head and answered.
“…I’m not going to talk about it. I’m on your side.”
“Is that so? As expected, it’s our Ari. I really love you.”
“But before that, I need to explain the situation. So what is your relationship with him?”
“That’s…”
Yoona looked at me with a little hesitation. I didn’t know how to answer either, so I just stared. I had no idea how to explain all these things.
“There is so much I need to say, Ari.”
“…”
“If I were to tell you one clear fact…”
Yoona seemed to have made up her mind and grabbed my hand. She then placed her clasped hands on her knees and raised her head proudly.
“He is someone I like with all my heart.”
“…”
“Same goes for Ellen.”
“…”
A firm look appeared above the confident voice. I leaned on her hand and looked at her as expected.
“Hmm…”
Ari looked at us as if measuring us for a long time. Since she had been seeing Yoona for a much longer period of time than me, it seemed like I, who had suddenly appeared, needed time to acknowledge her existence. The expression on his face as he looked at various parts of my body was extremely serious.
But at the same time, it looked like he was holding back laughter. The corners of his mouth kept twitching, as if he wanted to say something. She looked at the two of us for a long time and then slowly opened her mouth.
“So?”
“So what?”
“So what are you going to do? Are you going to run away from love?”
“That’s…”
Yoona hesitated for a moment. But she made eye contact with me again and spoke with confidence in her voice.
“No. I won’t run away. I’m tired of just avoiding things now.”
“So? Even if I say yes, you know that her aunt won’t approve. How are you going to convince her?”
“There is a way. I have a plan that I made a long time ago. Right, Ellen?”
“Huh?”
At her words, I tilted my head blankly. It’s a plan I made a long time ago. I think the last place I made my plans was the Duke’s House. Did you say anything at that time? I think Yoona said something when she left work…
…No way.
After remembering her belatedly, I looked at Yuna with a tense expression. But she didn’t move at all and just nodded her head at me.
“…hahahaha.”
I laughed helplessly. Then he asked Yuna.
“Yoona. I’m asking this again…Are you really okay with me?”
“Are you asking me that now?”
“I think I have to ask even more now that it’s time. Are you really okay, Yoona? Even in a country like this?”
“It’s okay because it’s you. And Ellen.”
The joined hands dug deeper and deeper. Her wrists overlapped and her scar scratched my wrist. Yuna clearly felt the touch and opened her mouth.
“I will be happy.”
It was definitely something I said sometime ago. To the Duchess. To the duke. And to countless others. The promise that was once directed to the world was now directed to me. Yuna finally made the promise she had made to Yuna for herself.
“Because I promised that to everyone.”