180 – Guilt that comes from choice
“It’s so absurd I’m speechless.”
Unlike before, Aria, tightly wrapped in a gown, continued to express her dissatisfaction.
“How dare you try to violate the crown prince of the empire…?”
“You’re committing a crime… Just because it smells good, you’re accusing someone of being a rapist based on what you smelled.”
Ian, who was standing hunched over because his stomach hurt from being hit, also grumbled and took the hit.
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“Do you think that will mean that what you did to me was never done!”
“Then how can you endure it when they take off all their clothes and provoke you? Because it was me, it ended there. If you were me, you would have gone all the way to the end?!”
I flinch.
Aria was shocked by her sharp words.
She definitely did as he said, adding more, not less.
Even if she just imagined it, she was only at armpit level and couldn’t even fit her cute shaft.
“Do you think I’m a monkey crazy about s*x like you?”
She could never reveal that fact, so for no reason she raised her voice and pushed Ian to do it.
“If this matter gets to your father’s ears, your head will be hung on the street and made a spectacle of itself.”
Of course, I had no intention of saying anything. Rather, it is a fact that she has to hide from her father.
“…”
But it was effective for her Ian.
When she thinks of the emperor, who will soon turn from her son to a daughter, she was a worthy human being.
With her father and her chance on her back, Aria became even more arrogant and made fun of her mouth.
“Then, did you think the crime of touching the crown prince’s body would be light?”
In front of her, who used her power to control him, her Ian could not help but become infinitely smaller.
‘It’s unfair, really….’
Ian also had something to say.
Look, there was a man other than me there.
By now, that girl would have become a non-virgin who could not even dream of premarital chastity.
In a way, she saved Aria, who almost lost her experience count, with her hands.
In such a tense situation, she exercised her superhuman patience and reached a dramatic compromise with Yadrangi, which resulted in the death penalty.
“What are those eyes?”
“No, when I think about it, I think I made a lot of mistakes.”
When Aria shot him, he immediately lowered her tail.
If you can live by pleasing someone, you should do whatever you want.
“Aria.”
“What is it?”
“We’re still friends, right?”
Still, I was anxious, so I took the time to check on our friendship while she was ignoring me.
I trust my friend.
“Since when have you been my friend?”
I was stabbed in the foot by the ax I trusted.
“….”
“It’s a joke.”
Then Ian’s expression brightened.
“But we can’t just ignore this.”
Sullen.
I asked her because she took after her father and was adept at lifting people up and putting them down.
“Do you want to be forgiven?”
Are you saying that now?
Nod.
I nodded vigorously.
“Let’s see what would be good.”
She was lost in her thoughts, tapping her lips with her thin fingers.
“First of all… Okay, go and bring me the milk.”
Aria tells me that she always needs to drink milk after washing to relieve her discomfort, so she sends me on an errand.
It’s just a minor errand and it doesn’t really matter. The problem is that his expression is strangely angry.
‘If you’re going to look at it anyway, can’t you just coolly move on? You’re already doing things that only girls would do.’
Have those inner feelings been revealed on the outside?
“Looking at your expression, it looks like you don’t like my suggestion. Then, it never happened…”
“As I was thinking about how to bring something fresh, I think my agony was revealed in my expression.”
I cursed under my breath and quickly grabbed the milk from the refrigerator, then went to the shelf, took out a glass, and poured milk into it.
“Ugh.”
Still, my pride wouldn’t allow me to just serve it, so I added toppings that weren’t specifically in the order.
This is a skill I honed while working under Manager Kim, who always referred to an intern as a coffee machine at Jjakso.
On the outside, it’s hard to distinguish it from milk foam, but inside it was a little bit of my sincerity.
Service comes from the heart of a giver. Is not it?
I returned to her with a fake smile on my face and handed her milk in her glass.
“Honestly, I thought you would only bring milk. You seem to have quite the sense. I guess being a butler rather than a porter suits you better, isn’t it?”
What is a butler? Like Chloe, why does everyone think of me as a butler?
“I don’t know what to do with you since you’re praising me so much.”
“What? It’s an insight that a crown prince should naturally have.”
‘This b*tch….’
Aria took the milk she was handed to her mouth without much doubt.
-Gulp.
You drink it because it tastes good without even knowing what’s in it. So, I guess I just drank the poisoned tea before.
As I was thinking that in my heart, Aria’s eyebrows suddenly narrowed.
“Hmm…? Wait, this is…”
Instead of drinking, Aria starts looking back and forth between the milk in her hand and at me.
‘Surely you noticed that? ‘You’ve never been caught in a f*cking place before?’
Even the concentration was adjusted so that it would not be bothersome when eating. There is no way that a mere human tongue could distinguish the toppings manufactured through such careful inspection.
While I was trying to control my facial expression and trying to ignore the cold sweat running down my spine. Arya opened her mouth.
“The taste is quite good. It’s as good as the milk drunk in the imperial palace. Is it because of that magic tool?”
She emptied her glass with a satisfied look on her face.
Was what you showed earlier a hint of truth? It’s surprising people.
But looking at his expression, he seems to have relaxed a little.
“You know…”
“What is it?”
“You’re keeping it a secret from your dad, right?”
Then you should get a confirmation right away.
As I looked at her with expectant eyes, Aria spoke as if she were being generous.
“Well, if you follow my words often from now on, there’s nothing I can’t do for you.”
This is ridiculous.
“What is that expression? She still doesn’t seem to know what she did wrong.”
Aria begins to sharpen her blade as if she is embarrassed.
What are you going to say again?
“I hate to admit it, but look at this.”
She rubbed her stomach and opened her mouth.
“This body is capable of carrying a child. I was so surprised when I thought I was actually being raped by you.”
“No, what on earth did you think that led you to that conclusion?”
“…Anyway, I’m saying it was that scary.”
Aria, who was avoiding my gaze for some reason, muttered that.
“What do you think of me now? Hey, do you think I’m a pervert who can’t even have s*x with my friend?”
Then, a scene flashed through Aria’s mind.
-Asshole, asshole, pervert….
“Do you think I’m such a shameless person who gives up friendship because I’m blinded by s*xual desire?”
-You look like a woman, Ian.
Every word came back as a fatal blow.
“Well, do you know that? It’s not easy to do business with this body.”
Aria started saying things she wasn’t asked to change the subject.
“You have to squat down, and it’s not easy to adjust the angle. If you let your guard down even a little, you’ll jump out.”
Suspicious. I’m not the type of person to bring up such a shallow topic.
She was pretending to say something cheerful, but there was a bitterness in it that she could not hide.
“Hey, are you okay?”
“Of course it’s okay! Do I look like a piece of trash that can’t even deal with that kind of thing?!”
“Not that. There’s more.”
“….”
As expected, he could not easily respond to my words.
“It looks like I can’t hide it from you.”
She let out a sigh and continued.
“Actually, I’m on my way to wash up after sparring with Durandal.”
“Sparring?”
“Yes. I was curious to what extent I could accomplish with this body.”
She stared at her hands.
Newly formed blisters were rising on her fair, white hands.
“The balance of the body’s center of gravity was completely different from before. I was swinging the sword like I used to, and it was literally a spectacle.”
Looking at the guy’s expression, she could tell that the result was not very satisfactory.
“Among them, the thing I felt the most was the arm holding the sword. I never thought the sword I usually wielded would be so heavy.”
Aria had a bitter smile on her face as she said that.
Come to think of it, Gilbert had said something like that. It is said that a woman’s skeleton does not provide much strength compared to a man.
Is she born like Sonia, or is she like a warrior? If she didn’t have the powers she received from the goddess, it would be normal for her to be like this guy.
“Fortunately, there was no major inconvenience in doing my work, but it was a bit like that. I kept seeing lost things in my eyes.
I wrap my arms around my changed body
“To be honest, I’m scared. How can I lead the empire with a body like this? I didn’t know I was this weak.”
As I quietly listened from the side, I soon heard sobbing.
“I…! Sigh! Everything I’ve built so far, huh…! I feel like it’s all gone to waste, and I’m not confident that I’ll be able to do anything well…!”
Before I knew it, tears were falling down my cheeks.
Maybe it was because she was always conscious of being in front of others, but when her mask came off, her appearance was extremely fragile.
In times like this, a friend’s role is to be by your side.
“….”
Sigh.
I patted the guy on the back without saying a word.
“But, huh…! Thinking about the role given to me, I was so anxious…! So…!”
Aria cries to the point where you wonder if she might be hyperventilating.
In a way, it can be said that it is my fault that this happened. She fed me without knowing how to become a woman, but she was the one who caused it.
“Okay. Just cry your heart out.”
I held him in my arms and patted him.
It’s a pity that this is all I can do for him right now.
Just like when I was young and my teachers would hug me when I cried.
“aaah!”
The crying continued like that for a while.