36 – Haerin Kang (36)
Haerin Kang (36)
Bang, bang, bang!
My heart beat fast at the sound of a strong knock on the front door, but I pretended not to be there.
Good thing you changed your password.
If it wasn’t for that, because of my older sister’s personality, she would have come in and waited here while I went to school.
No, did I do well?
“Lee Dong-min-!”
I was sitting on the bed and covering my head.
Kang Hae-rin leaned close to me and gently hugged me and spoke comforting words.
“It’s okay, Dongmin.”
“……”
She put her lips lightly on my ear.
I flinched at the light touch, but Kang Hae-rin persistently hugged me and whispered.
“Don’t you ever think that your older sister’s obsession is a bit excessive? Shouldn’t this be enough to properly show your will? You are doing well.”
I was told not to talk bullsh*t, but my sister’s violent reaction scared me.
Enough with this, sister.
I mean, I can’t meet my sister right now.
Haerin Kang was very sensitive.
He barely managed to calm himself down until he heard an absurd order to brutally kill his sister in the novel, but when his sister shows up, he ruins everything.
Due to her personality, she would definitely shoot Kang Hae-rin, and it was clear that she would doubt our relationship.
I would think that I couldn’t have done that myself.
Then the two of them will catch fire again.
I couldn’t let my sister die.
… just let me suffer alone.
bang, bang!
I crouched down even more as I thought that my sister would please stop.
When I was young, I was afraid of being beaten, so I got tired of copying the Bible, so I went into my room, locked the door, and hid myself in a blanket in a sense of defiance.
The trauma of that time was over.
My father opened or broke down the door and came in and kicked me in the side and head, and my mother whimpered and cut herself.
‘Since my son, Woori, and Dongmin won’t listen, mom will be sick, is that okay?’
It reminded me of the distinctive piercing voice.
Of course, my sister wouldn’t go that far, but seeing that she’d been doing that for over 10 minutes, I was worried.
My hand is broken, sister.
please don’t do this to me
Pretty hands, broken…
“Lee Dong-min, I know what’s inside you…”
My sister’s voice outside the door stopped.
“Hey, let’s be quiet!”
I heard a murmur, so it must have been knocking so loudly that someone stepped out.
“… sorry…”
I heard her apologize.
Whoops.
After a while, a text came.
[Lee Dong-min, why aren’t you answering my phone?]
[Are you mad at your sister?]
[Isn’t something wrong?]
[I’ll come back later. contact me please.]
I couldn’t reply
I turned off the screen in despair.
I killed my sister
Even in the novel, he made Lee Dong-hyun, who was almost ‘me’, kill his sister ‘Lee Da-eun’.
When I said that I couldn’t think of a plot where I killed my sister, Kang Hae-rin gave me an idea.
“Look, your sister is a bit peculiar. Do you think that normal older sisters are so obsessed with their younger siblings?”
She insulted my sister’s care for me with something pathological, such as incestuous affection.
“It’s a novel after all.”
Kang Haerin said with a mocking laugh.
“And as far as I can see, that’s enough. Lee Da-mi is too attached to her younger sister Lee Dong-min. The way I see it, I don’t think this is normal.”
“Do not be ridiculous.”
I buried my face between my knees and spat out.
“That’s not what you’re talking about.”
Obsession is what you do, Kang Haerin.
Of course I admit it.
I was the creator of Kang Hae-rin, and I set up a violent setting so that she would be drawn to murder for the rest of her life.
In order to pay for that sin, I am doing everything she tells me to do, and pretending to be a dutiful boyfriend and attachment doll.
I can understand Kang Hae-rin’s jealousy after seeing Park Se-young and Baek Yu-ram after giving in a hundred times.
But my sister is not.
My sister and I are a family, even if we are only half, with mixed blood.
It was a disgrace to me to even insult a relationship like this, call it incest and all, and even write it in a novel to kill it.
I eventually succumbed to her and killed ‘Lee Da-hyun’ as Kang Hae-rin ordered, portraying her as an obsessed woman with a complicated mind for her half-brother.
How did your sister feel when she saw that?
It must have been more humiliating and insulting than me.
My sister knows that I am serializing 『Journal』, so if she suspects that I made the ‘incest’ episode myself, she will be angry with me too.
‘How could you write me like this?’
I thought I was going to die of guilt for portraying my older sister, who cared for me and comforted me like a mother, in this way.
It was understandable that my sister left more than 10 minutes of missed calls, and more than 30 missed calls before.
Whatever others say, I understand.
My sister must have felt betrayed.
“ha…”
I didn’t have the confidence to see my sister anymore.
If this was going to happen, I wondered if it would have been better to exchange my virginity and her maiden name as Kang Hae-rin requested, but I thought that was absolutely not possible.
It’s still scary, but if the meaning of being each other’s ‘first’ arises in the story, now she will interfere and act more than my wife.
I made up my mind
If I’m going to keep hurting people around me like this, I’d rather disappear.
No matter how I thought about it, it seemed like it would be better.
But I won’t give in to Haerin Kang either.
I have to let her know that I’m sorry for being sorry, responsibility is responsibility, but that doesn’t mean she has no right to hurt the people I love.
After learning that he was a character in his own novel, Kang Hae-rin’s words and actions became straightforward and free of qualms.
Fortunately, that was fortunate.
It was because I was emotionally unstable that my hair was gradually standing up and my body was constantly sweating.
Then maybe I would have fainted again.
As much as I know about Kang Hae-rin, Kang Hae-rin knows about my mental illness.
being vulnerable to stress.
Because of that, I was able to be alone for a while.
I couldn’t even sit still because of the exhaustion, so I lay on the bed and stared at my phone blurry.
If you publish more than 1,000 novels serially, only those who will follow you will follow, so most of them are well received unless they are tolerable.
I also know what kind of stories readers like, so I don’t drift too much.
Kang Hae-rin in 『Journal』 showed off her charm while searching for a ‘prey’ that could be a contradictory legitimate murder, even though she is a mad psychopath.
However, after resuming serialization, the reaction was bad.
[… Author? What is this…?]
[After resuming the serialization of the writer, he was assassinated and someone else wrote it? Give back writer Kang Hae-rin~!!]
[(Emoji breaking laptop screen)]
[This is not the Kang Haerin I knew!!!]
ㄴ[Are you talking about the author or the main character?]
ㄴ[both ㅅㅅ]
This level was aegyo.
Park Se-young and Baek Yu-ram episodes were killers who had been ‘convicted’ of violent crimes until now.
However, after that, she falls in love with the random character named ‘Lee Dong-hyun’ and chooses a prey that is not so wrong because she is blinded by jealousy, which she would not normally do.
To say that Park Se-young and Baek Yu-ram’s fault was only a little ‘tailing’ to Lee Dong-hyun.
It was only natural that public opinion towards Kang Hae-rin would deteriorate.
In the most up-to-date, ‘Lee Da-eun’ episode, even Kang Hae-rin, not Lee Dong-hyun, becomes the main character.
When his obsessive older sister interferes with his relationship with Kang Hae-rin, he personally slit her neck and wrists.
This was a troublesome drift in many ways.
The problem is that the main character of 『Ilji』 is not Kang Hae-rin, but ‘Lee Dong-hyun’, and the shocking subject matter of ‘incest’ was also a problem.
Readers of 『Journal』 cheered for Kang Hae-rin’s bizarre method of murder, but put a lot of importance on justification.
Kang Hae-rin was able to be popular despite being a nerd because her behavior is explainable.
He’s crazy, but he’s not a ‘bad guy’.
But in the last three episodes, I have ruined what readers expect at once.
It was understandable that there were malicious comments.
[Writer, if you’re going to write something like this, just rest a little longer and come. What is this…]
[Looking at the writing, I think it’s the right person, but why is the development like this? It’s like a sickness…]
[I feel so sorry for my sister. Isn’t Donghyun Lee a psychopath? And when will Harin come out ;]
[I’ve had fun watching it, but the recent episodes have fallen badly. Get off, ㅅ ]
“……”
Having to disappoint readers while writing my work was more painful than having to insult people around me because of Kang Hae-rin.
I sighed.
How the hell am I going to convince Kang Hae-rin?
It wasn’t just a couple of things to worry about.
At least give your sister a chance to explain.
I wish I could give my sister a chance to make excuses for her hurt heart while reading the latest episodes, but then Kang Hae-rin will look at her suspiciously.
I didn’t know that other people thought it was strange because my sister treated me too much, like a precious youngest son.
But since we are siblings, we can do that.
Instead of making excuses for their doubts and disturbing imaginations, I decided to understand my sister.
But Haerin Kang won’t understand.
Of course, there were times when I felt burdened too.
No matter how much they were siblings, I felt uncomfortable when I saw my older sister’s silk slip revealing her mature style, and her habit of hugging me against her bare skin made me feel uncomfortable.
But I do it because I love it.
Not because it has any other meaning.
As she used to say, we are her only ‘blood relatives’.
My sister and I each have mothers who are living well with other men somewhere in the world, and even though they are old and ugly, there is also a father who regularly meets women, perhaps because of his skill at brushing his teeth in the past.
But we did not consider them blood relatives.
‘They only have each other.’
It was something she often said to me.
My older sister once said something like that.
‘Lee Dong-min, are you uncomfortable with your sister being too friendly?’
It was when I ran away from home and stayed at my sister’s house.
The time when I was in the middle of real estate with my sister before I became independent with the money I saved.
It was pretty fun back then.
Sometimes, while eating beer and chicken, we would share things we hadn’t been able to do before.
‘… no? why? Is Eun-ah noona like that?’
‘Not only him, there are many people who say something to me. If you feel uncomfortable, tell me.’
she said with a troubled expression.
‘But know that. Noona, I originally intended to die when I was 20. You know what?’
‘… Nuna, that means…’
‘But the reason why he didn’t die is because of you.’
‘……..’
‘It’s so sad that a child lives as if he’s dead, so I want to protect him too. You were just like a living dead person.’
I think that’s the sister’s sincerity.
My sister felt sorry for me.
And my sister should know.
That I was actually about to die.
The reason I didn’t do that was because of my sister.
“……”
So my heart was heavier.
I know.
The way my sister and I think of each other, the fact that Kang Hae-rin thinks it’s strange.
Even if it’s not an incestuous feeling like she’s delusional, it’s true that she’s stronger than others.
This is a feeling that cannot be explained.
I turned off my phone while looking at my sister’s text message that had already arrived a few hours ago.
So I can’t see my sister.
I tried to find a way for everyone to coexist by making Kang Hae-rin’s guard down as much as possible.
Park Se-young, Baek Yu-ram, noona, no one gets hurt, and Kang Hae-rin go in a direction where I can take responsibility.
Entering Kang Hae-rin’s mansion is something that only happens at the end of my studies.
That wasn’t a good option.
The more time she spends with me, the more things about me will fill her mind.
She didn’t just take solace in me, she was close to being completely addicted to me.
Going there should be avoided if possible.
While I was thinking about a few things, it was evening.
It was like I fell asleep for a while.
It wasn’t quite evening, but through the slightly open curtains, the car lights occasionally scanned the ceiling.
It was dark because there were no lights on.
I slowly raised my upper body.
My body trembled slightly.
When I woke up, the window was slightly open.
Closed the door.
… Is Kang Hae-rin still outside?
If she knew I was in a good mood, she knew how to step back in moderation, and she was a master of push and pull, but it was the first time she had endured this much while being in the same house.
But I didn’t want to go out into the living room.
Despite her beauty, I hated her.
Did I have to go this far? I wanted to protest.
Piririk.
It was then.
The door opened in the hallway and a voice was heard.
“Lee Dong-min-!”
… can’t be like this?
It was my sister’s voice.
Even though she’s an older sister, something feels different than usual-
thud.
The door burst open.
As soon as my older sister, wearing an H-line black skirt, stockings, black frill blouse and gray knitwear, saw me, she ran to me with tears on her face.
prison.
She held me in my arms lying on the bed and kissed her on the lips one after another.
“Hey, Lee Dong-min, you…”
She buried her face in my chest and let out a sobbing sound.
Her clothes smelled cold like someone who had been outside for a long time, and the smell of hot alcohol emanated from her mouth.
She grabbed my cheek again and kissed me.
Of course, it wasn’t a tongue-in-cheek s*xual kiss, just like a benevolent mother in the West would do to a worried son, an urgent—
“……”
I could see Kang Hae-rin, arms crossed over her shoulder, with a strange expression of elation and anger.