54 – Haerin Kang (54)
Haerin Kang (54)
I called several times, waited for the signal to drop, and tried again.
“Are you not taking it?”
My sister took the phone that was in my hand.
“Let’s wait a little bit.”
“… but.”
I bit my lip.
I hadn’t even thought of it.
I was only concerned with the purpose of preventing Kang Hae-rin from committing murder, so I couldn’t consider what she was thinking or feeling.
If you thought Kang Hae-rin was an ordinary girl, you shouldn’t have thought that she would take it lightly when her lover was attacked right in front of her eyes.
I realized that fact too late.
“I don’t understand why you asked me to leave it alone when I told you to pay more attention to it, but… You just have to do well in the future. We have a lot of time.”
My sister read it like an adult.
“… will it be okay? Harin?”
I said nervously.
“I… did I just say something boastful?”
My fists were clenched tightly.
I didn’t think about it at all from her point of view when she said that she would protect her and that you should stay still.
Haerin Kang was still a character to me.
“Dongminah.”
My sister sat down next to the bed.
The hand caressing my cheek was warm.
The stern expression a moment ago had disappeared, and now a benevolent smile had taken its place.
“are you okay. First of all, getting your body healthy is the priority. Harin will want that too.”
“……..”
My sister must have been very surprised when I was stabbed, and it was the first time I had ever seen her cry like that.
No, in the past, when my older sister was in middle school, she saw me and cried like that once.
It was the day I ran away from home for about a week to rehearse before running away in earnest.
My father was not a family man, so he didn’t care if my sister was away for a few days.
And I was living apart from my mother and had just joined the family after receiving a call from my father.
It was like that that day too.
It was a day when my father did not come home and my mother went hungry for several days after being away from home for a long time because she had to go to a camp prayer meeting with church members.
I will never forget the expression on my sister’s face at that time.
‘… you, you… are you hungry? Uh, what is this face…’
Until then, my older sister, who treated me coldly, hugged me and cried, wondering why she was so sad.
‘… you scumbags – not even parents!’
After that, it was the tears of a sister I hadn’t seen in a while.
A few days ago, when her hand was pierced by a blade at Ban Yi-jae’s house, she cried out similarly to that time.
The person who hurt me more than my wounds.
‘You are too indifferent to yourself.’
My sister told me that, but it seemed to me that she was just as indifferent to herself as they were.
A person who cares about others more than himself.
Because that was my sister.
In that sense, my sister was not normal either.
I always pretended to be confident in front of others, but I know that.
That my sister’s interest in me was abnormal.
“Okay, Dongmin? Let’s take care of ourselves first.”
Unaware of my thoughts, my older sister still worried about me, regretted my calmness, and whispered.
“First of all, take care of yourself.”
I didn’t tell my sister directly, but my sister and I don’t know if my heart has been sick for a long time.
A state that is alive but cannot be said to be alive.
My sister once said
If it wasn’t for you, I would have committed suicide.
I said it was my hope.
It was my wings and my shackles.
‘You guys are strange.’
The reason our siblings had no choice but to rely on each other to the extent of being suspicious was because there was no reason to leave a string of lingering attachment in this world without each other’s existence.
If I had been alone, and perhaps if my sister had been alone, there would have been no reason to live.
Each other was the reason for living for each other.
‘Take care of yourself.’
Behind those words, these words must have been hidden.
‘If it’s not you, I have no reason to live.’
I didn’t think deeply about it before.
My body and my mind, I thought, were irrelevant.
Because they are already broken and broken.
What is the use even if the ruins are in ruins again?
But now I seemed to know.
Sometimes, abusing myself, blaming myself hurts the people who love me.
Perhaps my indifference and neglect of myself became indifference to my alter ego Kang Hae-rin.
I was doing her wrong too.
“I will look for Harin. don’t worry.”
my sister said
“You leave at least a text message. Even if Hae-Rin Kang in the novel and Hae-Rin Kang in reality are not completely ‘matched’, Hae-Rin Kang in reality is a strong enough person.”
“……”
I looked at my hand in a cast.
I’m definitely not feeling well right now.
If he continues to look for Haerin, he will commit the mistake pointed out by his sister again.
Harin and noona will make it difficult.
What should I do?
“… okay. sister. please. And thank you.”
From nob le mt l. co m
Jjook.
My sister kissed my forehead.
“It’s nice, my brother.”
“……”
I know it’s hard for Haerin, but I left a text asking her to come visit me if possible.
[I’ll try.]
The text that arrived from Haerin was meaningful.
The fact that it took almost an hour to reply was different from her usual pattern, but it was not that she said she would come, but that she would ‘try hard’ should be considered fortunate.
What the hell is Harry thinking?
It was a little sullen, but I endured it because I thought that forcing it here was a burden on Haerin.
As my sister said, I decided to work hard for a possible recovery.
Outside the window, it continued to rain heavily.
Clouds covered the sky and covered the world.
The ground, where not even a handful of light was allowed, became a dark area even in broad daylight.
Occasionally the wind blew and caressed the empty branches.
I heard a ghastly sound and repeated the end.
Herbs and flowers were growing in the garden of the hospital that I looked out at, so it was green and sometimes colorful.
Usually, patients and their families who came out to pick sunflowers were sitting on the bench, but today, because of the inclement weather, not a single person was seen.
#
After a while, there was a visit from the hospital.
They were Baek Yu-ram, Park Se-young, Hwang Ji-young, and Kim Yoon-ah.
As if my sister was very happy that I had friends, she moved away with a wide smile.
“The possessors, I named them.”
Park Se-young said while putting the fruit basket on top.
“The name of the club.”
As a member, I didn’t do anything other than make a fuss about being strong on the first day, but they still considered me as a member.
I was the one who had never been affiliated with or had no friends before, so I was moved to tears.
“Seniors are members too. Do not forget it? It is not compulsory, but you can come when it is convenient for you.”
Park Se-young’s body, which was close to me, smelled slightly fishy but sweet rain and wind.
“He doesn’t even attend.”
Baek Yu-ram said cynically.
“Sister- you said there were circumstances, really, after all-”
Park Se-young inflated her cheeks.
“There are so many people in the world who need my help. I can’t wait.”
“If that’s the case, why not join the volunteer club?”
“I already heard it. two of them too. Would you like to see a picture of the abandoned dog care center?”
“……..”
Baek Yoo-ram laughed as if it was absurd.
“It’s not just about that.”
“Right?”
“Nowadays, I even doubt that. Just like the kids who want to join a club because they miss Lee Dong-min, I wonder if Park Se-young also created a club.”
“… uh, what do you mean by that?”
“I made it to seduce Lee Dong-min, a club.”
“I don’t know what you mean…?!”
“Isn’t that strange when you think about it? I don’t know if it’s Jiyoung or Yoona, but Seyoung Park, you didn’t even like Webso. Oh, does this even make sense when I say it?”
“Unni-!”
Park Se-young screamed loudly, and Hwang Ji-young and Kim Yoon-ah burst into laughter, causing a little commotion.
“I originally liked genre literature. I like gays, I like grapes, and when it comes to classics, I’m a huge fan of Bram Stoker and Mary Shelley.”
“It’s different from web novels.”
Baek Yoo-ram said with a laugh.
“Why lie the truth?”
“Ahhh, unnie, you are mischievous! If you come out like this, I can’t stand it. Seriously, it’s my sister who is deceiving me. Why are you projecting on me?!”
It was a bit disturbing, but not too bad.
It was thanks to them that I learned that being surrounded by people is quite fun.
In the past, I would have only been stressed.
At least the kids I talked to were the ones with bad personalities like Seo In-woo, Nam Jae-chan, and Kim Hye-eun who were obsessed with harassing me.
“How do you feel?”
Baek Yoo-ram sat down on a chair and asked.
It’s been a few weeks since I’ve seen her, but somehow in the meantime, I’ve lost some weight and felt emaciated.
The way I wear clothes also feels different.
Maybe it was because the impression of a fairly revealing outfit like a deeply fanned round neckline stuck in me, but the way she was wrapped up was a bit awkward.
Of course, it’s probably because it’s cold.
When I stared at her face, Baek Yoo-ram put on an uncomfortable expression and cleared his throat and touched his lips.
“… why? What did you bury?”
I asked.
“Is Song Yeon-woo still harassing you?”
“… what?”
At my question, she put on a dumbfounded expression.
“You seem to have lost some weight. I wonder if Song Yeon-woo is still bothering you… if that’s the case…”
“hey.”
Baek Yu-ram put on a fierce expression.
I was afraid that I had said something ignorant again, so I asked her with a puzzled expression.
“why…?”
“Are you saying that even in this situation? You are the one stabbed by the knife. Can you afford to be interested in me, no, pretend to be interested in me?”
“Pretending to be interested, it’s not like that…”
“Right. Anytime you don’t even contact me-!”
“No, because I’m worried… And I’m not interested, I’m really curious… I’m worried…”
“Ha ha ha ha…”
she smiles wildly
“… you really are a sinful man.”
“… uh? Are there many sins? Are you talking about original sin?”
I remembered the sins my mother had told me about since I was little, that all humans are born with.
“Original sin is not a matter of quantity, but…”
“What are you talking about?”
Baek Yu-ram said with a straight face.
“…because you’re so kind… what are you doing?”
“… I’m not nice.”
Baek Yoo-ram, who was looking at me carefully, said.
“Now I see you, you were born. this way.”
“… what?”
“Isn’t it your specialty to flirt with women with an innocent expression and say I’m not great? Do you know?”
“… uh?”
Baek Yu-ram, who suddenly shot at me.
He lowered his head and murmured gloomily.
“I’m not trying to be greedy, but why do you keep doing that…”
It was a self-talk, rather than addressed to me.
When the atmosphere became awkward for a while, Park Se-young intervened.
“sister? Calm down? Isn’t this a place like this now? Today, we only talk about our seniors.”
“you idiot. It will.”
Baek Yoo-ram, who instantly freed his expression like magic, cheerfully tapped Park Se-young on the head.
“I’m afraid I’ll fall for a fox like that!”
“……”
Occasionally, a strange air flow passed by, but Park Se-young and Baek Yu-ram all cared about my safety in a friendly way, except for the bad last one.
… I was very fortunate.
And seeing that I feel this way, it seems that I also had a pretty good relationship with them.
“But what is the name of the person caught?”
The conversation naturally moved to the Ban Lee Jae case.
They were amazed and amazed at the fact that I was present at the time Ban Yi-jae was captured.
Of course, in reality, I didn’t say that I cooperated with the detectives to find them, but I explained that I happened to run into them while passing by the scene where they were being caught.
Already in Eta, the arrest of Ban Yi-jae was circulating to some extent through his acquaintances’ acquaintances.
Ban Lee-jae was not a literary major, he was a theater and film major, but he was already a good-looking trash.
Not only Kim Hye-jeong, but also many women who were subjected to dating violence and who were filmed hidden.
“Interest in ‘righteous people’ is exploding.”
Park Se-young said with interest.
“So far, all the cops have been fooling around. I get a lot of swearing from the media. But since the investigation was narrowed down suddenly, there must have been an informant.”
“… okay?”
“Is that your senior?”
Park Se-young said.
“It didn’t happen by accident, did the senior notice something and report it to the detectives?”
“… What kind of hero am I?”
I said awkwardly.
Park Se-young didn’t seem to believe it, but I had no intention of revealing that I was a righteous person or anything.
As much as it was done for the happiness of Haerin and I in the first place, I hate to harm our peace.
The categorical detective told his superiors that he would promote something like a ‘righteous citizen’, but he declined that too.
But since I keep insisting, I don’t know if I’ll end up doing interviews with the press.
“…what the hell are you doing?”
Baek Yu-ram said while fiddling with my hand.
It feels like an action that is added unconsciously, while muttering, rather than a conscious action.
“……”
There weren’t enough chairs in the hospital room for everyone to sit on, so the juniors made way for her to sit next to me.
At first, Baek Yoo-ram was embarrassed that he was being treated like an old man, but now he was sitting quietly and peeling apples.
Come to think of it, Baek Yu-ram, unlike his easy-going personality, was surprisingly good at cooking and good with his hands.
He hates being misunderstood because of his outward image, but he had a cooking license, and the last time he went to his own room, he was pretty tidy.
As if hypnotized, between Baek Yu-ram’s fingers, the peel of an apple sliced as thin as a sheet of paper.
It was a very delicate move.
“There are no clubs, and the school is taking a leave of absence.”
Contrary to the movement, Baek Yoo-ram spoke sharply.
“Were you filming a thriller?”
She somehow seemed to have become more cynical while I hadn’t seen her, but she still seemed very concerned about what she was talking about while tickling my arm.
“Has Harin been there too?”
“… huh.”
I said.
When I heard Baek Yu-ram’s words, I thought of Hae-rin, who didn’t answer my calls, and my heart darkened.
phut.
“Ugh, I guess someone isn’t a pathetic wife.”
Baek Yoo-ram lightly tapped my arm and said brightly, as if my facial expressions had deteriorated.
“i envy you. Mr. Harleen too. I would be really happy to know that you think of me like this-!”
“…I wonder if.”
“Of course not!”
It was the time when I was bewildered watching Baek Yu-ram, who was raising the tension noticeably.
“Oh right.”
Park Se-young clapped her hands.
“senior. Can I visit you one more time later?”
“… huh? Then, of course.”
“Hyejeong also said she wanted to see senior.”
“Ahh.”
I nodded.
It is impossible to rule out her as the person who made the greatest contribution to catching Ban Yi-jae.
Besides, there was no reason to refuse to come to the hospital because he was worried about me and it was nothing else.
“However much.”
“Then I’ll tell Hyejeong.”
Park Se-young typed a text.
It seems that he is conveying the news to Kim Hye-jung.
“Then shall we go now? Guys? The patient must be tired.”
Baek Yu-ram put down the knife he was cutting the apple with and said.
“I will come again next time. Dongmin Lee. Take good care of yourself.”
“… Yes, thank you. everyone.”
I said.
Baek Yu-ram, like her mother, gently hugged Hwang Ji-young and Kim Yoon-ah and pushed them out of the hospital room.
It seemed that he had glanced at me just before.
thud.
However, Park Se-young stayed even after the door was closed.
“… huh? Seyoung, why? What do you have to say?”
Park Se-young, who stood with his back to the door, said.
“Sir, can I ask you something?”
“… However much.”
“… where is Kang Hae-rin?”
suddenly?
I answered shyly.
“… Yes, not now.”
You don’t have to tell me the details.
It was such a disgrace and embarrassing thing to me that I couldn’t pay proper attention to Harin.
Of course, they don’t know the details of the relationship between her and me, but they couldn’t be proud of themselves.
He spoke vaguely about Harin’s situation.
“what’s the matter?”
I asked again.
I felt uncomfortable as I remembered that Park Se-young looked at the relationship between me and Hae-rin with suspicion until the last time I saw him.
She probably thought I was living some kind of weakness in her.
Of course, it was not wrong, but her interest in us, whose relationship was to be restored after a long time, was not very welcome.
“Seyoung, we’re fine.”
I said.
“Between us, I really like it. I think I know what you’re thinking, but it’s not a one-way relationship, nor is it a gaslighting relationship.”
“……”
However, Park Se-young was still immersed in thought, as if she was not satisfied.
“… what’s going on?”
I asked again.
“senior.”
Park Se-young said.
“I know it sounds crazy. Doesn’t Ban Yi-jae’s case appear in the novel?”
“… uh?”
“Actually, I came here to talk about this. Don’t worry. Yu-Ram unni and I know that the writer of 『Kang Hae-Rin’s Murder Diary』 is a senior. Jiyoung and Yoona don’t know.”
I’m not worried at all.
Park Se-young said with a clear pronunciation.
“But thanks to the dogs, I found out. The two of them, I liked 『Kang Hae-rin’s Murder Diary』, so I was reading it until recently.”
… how?
Obviously, all the novels have been written down.
Ignoring my bewilderment, Park Se-young said.
“Do you know how this happened, senior?”
“… what…”
“no. I will change the question.”
“……..”
“Senior, I heard you’ve been dating Kang Hae-rin for quite some time? Senior, how much do you know about Mr. Harin?”
Park Se-young poured out questions without malicious intent.
“… Kang Hae-rin doesn’t exist, right?”