17 – 17. Starvation
Setting aside thoughts about my feelings towards him for a moment, it seemed like this could be an opportunity.
If I had provoked Count Lambert too much in this session, he might have tried to kill me, even using extreme methods.
But to think that he would try to kill even my daughter. My hands clenched at the fact that he truly did not see my daughter as family.
Her life must have been filled with unhappiness. How much sympathy did I have for her, living without even knowing emotions?
Her face, bursting with joy every time I taught her something new, how beautiful it was.
Just how wicked was Count Lambert, who made it impossible for her to live as a human in order to use her as a weapon?
Hot water enveloped my head gently and flowed down my chin.
After that, I dried my hair with a long towel and began putting on my clothes one by one.
A blue suit. It was a completely different vibrancy from the time when I only wore black. The outside as well.
I would rather not have to leave this mansion. The thought of having to return to that colorless mansion did not sit well with me.
Above all, the fact that I had to face Count Lambert once again was terrifying.
A dreadful human who tries to overturn people’s innermost thoughts and test them.
And that raven.
I was sick and tired of all these strange things, but the fact that I had to see him again in a week did not make me happy.
So, before I left, I wanted to enjoy my life in this mansion to the fullest. In addition, I had to think about how I could successfully marry her.
“Young master, are you awake?”
“Ah, yes. Good morning.”
The maids and servants who greeted me with a smile, their warm faces, even as they worked.
They had a completely opposite atmosphere from the people in that mansion who greeted me with a cold greeting while maintaining a blank expression.
As I exchanged greetings with the people I encountered – of course, their number was fewer than those at the Count Ramber’s mansion – I arrived at the restaurant’s entrance.
Upon opening the door and stepping inside, there was already someone seated.
“Hmm, you woke up early.”
A familiar voice. The owner of that voice, which was soft and made people feel at ease, was Lepeti’s father, Frederick Gail.
“Father.”
As I uttered those words, for some reason, I was able to greet him with a happy expression.
Perhaps it was because I could finally meet someone on my side. Because I could turn away from the people who were hostile towards me and be with those who could treat me warmly.
Although he was not my real father, unlike the previous encounter… I sat comfortably next to him and exchanged greetings without hesitation.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Yes. I was able to fall asleep comfortably last night. It was the first time I had such a peaceful night.”
“Is that so?”
“You also look good. You didn’t oversleep today either.”
“I can’t stay in bed forever.”
“Yes… that’s true.”
A faint smile appeared on his face, but it was not a very pleasant complexion.
I know the reason. It must be because of the things he had to say to me in a few days.
But surely, it couldn’t be that the private conversation was already taking place between Gail and Melbus.
“So, what do you plan to do today?”
However, he quickly recovered his composure and asked me about my schedule after putting down his utensils.
In the previous encounter, I was so flustered that I blurted out whatever came to mind… But this time, I was able to have a decent conversation with him.
At least the past week I spent with him made me somewhat similar to Lepti.
“Well… I don’t think there’s anything else to do today other than the tasks my father assigned.”
Lepti occasionally received lessons from his father about being his successor. Of course, there weren’t many tasks because of the small size of their territory.
Even in the game, the tutorial mostly involved helping with his father’s errands and engaging in light conversations with people.
Soon, his father’s plate was cleared, and a meal was placed in front of me.
As I picked up the napkin from the table and placed it on my lap, he paused for a moment and made a suggestion.
From Noble mtl dot com
“Let me handle today’s paperwork. How about going out to the city with me later?”
“That sounds good. A trip to the city?”
“It’s been a while since I’ve had the leisure to go out with my son.”
I could vaguely sense that it wasn’t just leisure.
Rather, it was an effort to spend what little time he had left with his son.
Initially, or rather, back then, I couldn’t accept this suggestion because I was used to sleeping in.
The first version of me seemed absent-minded, but I decided to act more ideally for his sake.
Placing the napkin on my lap, I asked him where we should meet.
“Well then, where should I wait after finishing the meal?”
“Wait at the main entrance. It’ll be around the time I finish my work when you’re done with your meal.”
“Understood.”
“Take your time eating. Today, the meat is good.”
“See you later.”
A smile appeared on his face after the conversation. Could being able to spend time with his son make a father so happy?
He had never experienced being a father before. But with more time to think, he found himself thinking more.
However, at the end of those thoughts, there was always one thing that remained.
How would those who hadn’t received this kind of love live, and most importantly, how much loneliness had Irene endured?
…For now, it was time to start the meal.
The tender-looking braised meat and boiled beans looked somewhat delicious.
*
It’s a contract, a contract. You will make a contract with me.
I will share my power with you.
You will fill my hunger.
The more you give me, the more I will give you.
But be careful. We are many, yet one.
Your father will feel that you have come to know us.
We are drawn to things that sparkle.
The more they sparkle, the bigger and tastier, the better. The more they make us curious, the better.
Fill our hunger.
Then your hunger will be filled too.
In that whisper, I met its eyes.
Red eyes. Not just one, but thousands of red eyes.
I was not afraid. I was not devoured by fear.
When it comes, it will be when I have lost him.
If such great despair approaches once again, I won’t be able to endure it.
I shivered at the thought that this might be the last chance.
The last chance to save him. The last chance to hold him in my arms.
The only chance to embrace him, the one who escaped from Rambert’s grasp and gave me a new world.
In the first chance, I didn’t know his worth and lost him. In the second chance, I promised not to let him go, but I broke that promise.
So in the third chance, where I know everything, I won’t lose him.
…If I am with the crow. Surely.
Once I made up my mind, I stood in front of those eyes and spoke.
“I will do it. Give me strength. Give me the power to keep him by my side. Make him know. Make him know everything that could harm him.
Make him know where he belongs, what he desires, what he loves, what he hates.
Make him happy, make him sad, make him hate…
Give me everything I need to love him. Make it possible for me to love him.
If I do that, I will give you what you want. I will give you what you want.”
They looked at me.
With their red eyes, they stared at me without a blink.
One of them opened its beak.
Good. I’m fine. Already, it’s overflowing with ambition.
Another one flew over and sat beside me.
I’m fine too. I like curiosity.
And soon, one by one, they began to come flying in, each of them opening their mouths.
He has already promised more than what he promised. He is promising more than he can give.
What I have promised this time is something new. I don’t really know.
Because it’s new, I want to try. I’m tired of dealing with sparkling things every day.
And when the number of crows that came to me was so large that it was hard to count, I could finally open my eyes.
…It was a camping ground. The camping ground I headed to on the way to the city I was ordered to go.
Surely, even when I woke up, it was here.
The people he attached to me were still sleeping around.
…My hands and feet moved fine. My body was the same.
I really came back. I came back.
That day, at the same time and place as the day I opened my eyes.
Seeing that the cold sword was mine, I could clearly feel that I had come back.
“Th-thank goodness. Thank goodness… Ahh…!”
My true feelings that came out without my knowledge. Words that flowed out of my mouth, and hot liquid that flowed out of my eyes.
But without knowing it, I blocked it all.
I covered my mouth with my hand, and the hot feeling instantly subsided.
Soon, I was able to maintain a completely expressionless face.
But my heart couldn’t do it at all. Not at all. Why?
If I reveal my heart like that, he will find out.
At least until I meet him, you shouldn’t show your emotions.
If he realizes that you’ve become strange, he will die again.
Several different voices whispering in my ear.
But I could tell that they belonged to those birds.
It’s no wonder, since those birds were perched on my shoulders all of a sudden.
Three crows with red eyes.
Even though their beaks were closed, their voices flowed clearly into my ears.
That’s our first power.
The first gift I gave you.
The red eyes that can read the thoughts of crows and humans. I released the restrictions on them. And –
Caw, you will be able to know all of his thoughts. Whether you want to or not.
…It seemed like I received an absurd gift.