38 – Episode 38
# 38
As the Talian territory drew near, the Count summoned Ian.
Lucy sat beside the Count.
“Hmm. Raven. I heard some rumors, you know.”
“Rumors, you say?”
“There’s talk that you’re brewing some mysterious potion. What kind of potion are you making with a spoon, for heaven’s sake?”
…”
Ian’s specially crafted spoon stew had somehow transformed into a spoon potion.
“No, but seriously, how do you make a potion with a spoon?”
As the Count smirked, Lucy excitedly explained.
It turns out there are tiny, invisible bugs on the spoon! You boil them as ingredients…!”
“Ah, I see.”
Watching his uncle and nephew enthusiastically chatting, Ian sighed deeply.
Oh, where did this era go wrong?
“Well, potion-making is important, but I called you for something even more crucial.”
“… What is it?”
Worried that the Count might engage in some medieval antics again, Ian was somewhat surprised to hear a surprisingly normal request from the Count.
“I hope you’ll keep the mercenaries in check, so they don’t cause too much trouble.”
Within the Marquess’s army, Ian’s authority was surprisingly strong.
Ian’s actions, such as boiling spoons for personal hygiene and drying bedding in the sun, seemed quite peculiar to the mercenaries, but Ian was known to be a fairly skilled magician.
Ian’s cosplay as a fairly accomplished magician was decent enough that he didn’t get completely ignored by others.
“We will soon pass through small villages. I hope the mercenaries will behave themselves.”
In response to the Marquess’s request, Ian narrowed his eyes slightly.
“If that’s the case, wouldn’t the knights handle it better?”
To this, the Marquess shook his head and said,
“The knights often cover up and turn a blind eye to the misconduct of the mercenaries, as they are in cahoots with them.”
It meant that it was not a mission suitable for the knights.
Once the battle began, the mercenaries had to follow the knights’ orders. They fought under the Marquess’s banner, so it was only natural.
For the knights, the mercenaries were no different from soldiers they had to command, so they were reluctant to harshly punish them for making mistakes.
Of course, serious offenses like looting villages would be severely punished, but it was ambiguous whether pillaging a village was considered a major offense.
From a modern perspective, looting civilians is a war crime. But talk of war crimes only makes sense in the modern world.
In a world where war equaled looting, pillaging by mercenaries was as natural as a supermarket being looted during a riot.
In the first place, most mercenaries roamed around to plunder civilians.
So, with an employer, they were mercenaries, and without one, they were bandits.
“I would tolerate looting to a certain extent… but this is my nephew’s land, isn’t it?”
Lucy vigorously nodded her head. It was the gaze of a lord who saw the people as nothing more than a source of revenue.
Why should aimless mercenaries meddle with my source of revenue?!
“If you step forward and issue a warning, the mercenaries will surely be more cautious.”
It wasn’t a particularly difficult request.
To Ian, who possessed the sensibilities of a modern person, preventing mercenaries from plundering felt like a righteous act in its own way.
“Understood. I will warn them so they won’t plunder.”
When Ian responded confidently, the nobles smiled with satisfaction.
The magician is indeed a useful presence!
After finishing the conversation, Ian left the viscount’s mansion.
Just as Lucy came out, Ian asked the question he had been curious about.
“Lucy, what’s the rumor about me making potions?”
“Ahahahaha… that?”
Lucy scratched her cheek and replied with an excuse.
“Well, you know, Ian boiled water with a spoon… Some mercenaries were curious about what that was…”
“???”
“So I sold a little bit of it…”
“Why would you sell that! You crazy woman!”
Selling boiled water with a spoon?
Even the Chinese wouldn’t do such a thing!
The Food Hygiene Law! Where is the punishment for unscrupulous food producers!
However, there was no such thing as food hygiene laws in the medieval fantasy world. Mercenaries who wanted to buy and consume the magical potions of the magician were plentiful.
The law of supply and demand.
The graph shape of ruthless capitalism was as cruel as it was terrible…
“I’m sorry… for selling it secretly,” Lucy apologized, bowing her head.
Ian couldn’t understand Lucy.
Shouldn’t she have felt sorry from the moment she sold that kind of thing?!
#
As the Viscount expected, the mercenaries showed interest in the village.
Surprisingly, there were villages scattered in all directions.
When people live, that’s what makes a village. And people, generally, settle wherever they want to live.
Whether it’s in a remote valley, near a stream, or on a grassy field…
Those who live in such secluded places carry great freedom and heavy responsibility.
They can live as they please, so they are free, but when something happens, they have to solve it with their own hands, so the responsibility is heavy.
For example, how to deal with greedy mercenaries sneaking in to steal.
“If you don’t want a hole in your head, back off! You damn thieves!”
There was a confrontation between the landlord and the mercenaries over a small village.
It was a fight between an ordinary civilian who lived with their family and mercenaries who came to steal while passing by.
“You’ll be the one with a hole in your head.”
“Just hand over three chickens. Then we’ll leave quietly.”
The landlord growled fiercely at the mercenaries, but they weren’t intimidated.
After all, mercenaries may not be good at fighting, but they shouldn’t be unable to make a quick profit. It was the same logic as the modern schoolyard bullies.
Even if fighting was pointless, being able to scare kids and snatch their money was essential for even the lowest-ranked bullies.
I can’t fight. That’s okay. Fights can be won or lost. But not being able to pick a lock means you can’t make a living. It was a lack of professional consciousness.
“Damn idiots…”
Ian, watching from afar, lost even the strength to be angry at the medieval-minded thieves.
No wonder the count asked for surveillance.
“Caw! Caw!”
As Oberon roared at the mercenaries, a few quick-witted ones flinched.
“Why’s that?”
“Well, that crow. Doesn’t it resemble the one our sorcerer keeps?”
“…It does seem similar.”
Then, fluent Imperial language escaped from Oberon’s mouth.
“Caw! Master! Caw! The master is coming!”
“Damn, what the hell!”
“The crow! The crow is speaking!”
The mercenaries were shocked.
The civilian families were equally astonished.
How many times have they seen a talking crow in their lives?
Oberon had diligently learned the Imperial language over Ian’s shoulder. With practical pronunciation training on top of that, he had learned to utter simple words.
Ian approached behind the mercenaries.
The mercenaries, spotting Ian, trembled and hesitated, sitting back in their places.
“What the hell are you all doing now?”
“…”
As Ian interrogated coldly, the mercenaries shut their mouths like bees who had just tasted honey.
“Under the banner of the Marquis, you dared to plunder the villages like common thieves. Are you trying to defile the name of the Marquis?”
Oberon, perched on Ian’s shoulder, shouted fiercely.
“Squawk! Punishment! Squawk!”
With their chilling appearance, not a single mercenary dared to raise their head.
“Ah, damn it!”
“This is messed up. Dammit!”
Plundering on the battlefield had to be discreet. The legality of plundering depended solely on the ruler’s decision. Turn a blind eye, and it was legal. Otherwise, it was illegal.
Especially in a situation like this, where no authority was established, even if punished, no one could protest against plundering.
“We apologize, sorcerer!”
“We have committed a grave sin!”
The mercenaries knew that Ian was the Marquis’s representative, so they immediately prostrated themselves on the ground.
In Chinese, it’s called “ouchetouji,” and in Japanese, it’s “dogeza.”
If it were a knight, they might have been able to smooth things over, but it was clear that such tricks would not work on the clever and eccentric sorcerer.
“Good thing they understand reason.”
Ian nodded as he looked at the prostrated mercenaries. While he had the Marquis’s authority, he didn’t possess any remarkable power. If the mercenaries turned against him, he would have to flee for his life.
As long as the opponent was pleading for mercy, there was no need for Ian to be too aggressive.
“Since the Count’s prohibition on looting has been issued, it is necessary to punish you as an example.”
“Well…”
“However! Considering that this is your first offense and that you have not yet committed a crime, I will let it pass with just a warning this time.”
“M-Master…!”
The mercenaries were moved to tears by the merciful decision of the wizard.
Even in a situation where he could have simply beheaded them on the spot for insolence, the fact that he made such a lenient decision! They had thought he was just a whimsical human who would do crazy things like making potions with a spoon, but they never knew he had such a humane side hidden within him.
“Thank you! We will never forget this grace!”
The mercenaries repeatedly bowed their heads in gratitude, but Ian felt no sense of satisfaction at all.
He could only hope they wouldn’t cause any trouble.
“Remember, my eyes are everywhere.”
“Kkaak! Kkaak!”
As Oberon fluttered his wings and cried out, the mercenaries felt a chilling fear as if their blood had turned to ice.
The wizard was using the bird to watch over the mercenaries!
“You may leave now.”
Ian led the mercenaries back to formation.
The civilian families hurriedly closed and barred their doors, and covered their windows with cloth.
As if they didn’t want to tell anyone what they had seen…
#
Ian patrolled the formation several times and caught the mercenaries attempting to loot.
Thanks to Ovairon’s active cooperation, surveillance was not difficult at all. Whenever they were short-handed, they recruited new part-timers from the nearby forest.
“Caw! Caw!”
When Ovairon perched at the end of Ian’s tent and cried out, the mercenaries trembled.
“That crow… is watching us…!”
“Shh! Keep quiet! The wizard might hear us!”
Every time Ian appeared before they went out for plunder, the mercenaries refrained from venturing outside.
The Count and Lucy were delighted to hear the news.
Wow! Ian has protected our precious money box (people)!
But Ian’s actions were not entirely positive…
Ian’s surveillance using the flock was excessively perfect, causing two unintended problems.
“The soldiers’ morale has plummeted.”
Not only could they not plunder, but the mercenaries also became excessively fearful of Ian.
It is said that their dislike of Ian even led to talks of desertion.
“There is another issue.”
The Count’s knight, Sir Decado, said.
“Our army poses no threat to the looters at all.”
Ian chuckled at the absurdity of it all.
“Over 400 troops marching, and no threat?”
“Yes. Our army is perfectly harmless.”
“The Duke explained with wonder.
War, originally, is an act that constantly brings trouble to others. The entity causing such trouble is, naturally, the military.
When the military marches, the area is bound to be reduced to rubble. Killing people moderately, plundering belongings, setting fires a bit…
The ultimate purpose of such troublesome acts is to put pressure on the enemy commander.
If the military indulges in looting and pillaging, the people become restless. When the people become restless, they complain to their leaders.
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In this case, it is the disgruntled masses.
If the Duke’s army had turned the territory into a wasteland and advanced, surely such words would be heard.
“You call yourself our king (or the equivalent)! The enemy is attacking right now, what are you doing? Seriously?”
According to the feudal contract, the self-proclaimed Marquis, Grime, has a duty to protect the people. But what if he fails to do so? The people will rise up.
Therefore, Grime has no choice but to engage in battle due to this pressure.
However, if the Earl’s army is marching peacefully like now… Grime loses the desire to fight quickly!
Leisurely gathering soldiers, waiting until the enemy’s supplies run out, and then fighting slowly is what he intends.
“Your Excellency. Even now, if you permit plundering…”
The Duke was lost in thought. It was he who issued the order to prohibit looting. He didn’t want to reverse the decision in a few days.
“I will consider it, and once I’ve made up my mind, I will give my decision.”
The Duke dismissed the knights and left only Lucy and Ian in the barracks.
“Wizard. Isn’t there any other way?”
The Duke immediately sought advice from a wise wizard. However, Ian wasn’t particularly sharp-witted.
Even if morale has dropped a little, can’t we just push through with sheer numbers and fight?
Lucy also couldn’t think of any ideas, so she pursed her lips in silence.”
“I’ll look for a way… but remember, pillage is also a method to consider.”
Ian said so and stepped back from his seat.
Then he pondered in his own way.
How could he appease the mercenaries’ discontent and incite the people?
“Um… Excuse me, wizard?”
“Yeah?”
But unexpectedly, a clue popped up from an unexpected place.
“I have something to ask.”
“What is it?”
“Um… You don’t make potions these days, right?”
…”
Not potions, you bastards.
Ian couldn’t understand the medieval people’s obsession with boiling water with a spoon to an extent that seemed suspicious.
Why would anyone pay for that kind of water…
“… Huh?”
At that moment, a strange thought briefly crossed Ian’s mind.
“Let me ask one thing. What do you use the potion for?”
Ian didn’t know what effect spoon-boiled water had or why it was considered a potion, but he could understand the mercenaries’ answer.
“Aren’t we about to engage in battle? I’ll use it then…”
“Spoon-boiled water?!”
Perhaps the mercenaries believed that Ian’s “potion” held some special power… But there was only one person capable of pulling off such a scam.
Lucy. It was clear that Viscount Talian had heavily indulged in the potion.
This was a clear opportunity for Ian.
“Potion… Hmm. Potion it is.”
Ian smiled slyly at the mercenaries.
The mercenaries, sensing an inexplicable chill from Ian’s expression, looked at him.
“If I make a potion. Would you be interested in buying it?”
“Well… of course we would buy it, wouldn’t we?”
“Then, what if I give it away for free?”
“… Pardon?”
The mercenaries were visibly shocked by Ian’s words.
Seeing their reaction, Ian was certain.
Perhaps there was a way to boost the mercenaries’ morale again at a low cost…!