071. Self-awareness (3)
“That statement, if you say it to someone else, I won’t forgive you.”
Honestly, it seemed overly dependent.
Being too absolute with one person was not good.
But that’s what she liked.
Instead of restraining him, Lucia threatened him.
“That’s impossible.”
Even with the threat, Owen just smiled.
His calm face was endlessly firm, and his words were obedient.
“I only love you.”
“Right now, that may be true.”
“I swear for a lifetime. If you want, I can make a promise.”
Under his calm gaze, Lucia remained silent.
His love was so deep, vast, and immense that she felt almost sorry to doubt him.
“I’ll trust you.”
“Yes. Trust me.”
“Do you… trust me?”
Lucia decided to stop pressing Owen.
Those eyes were filled only with her.
So, instead, she asked something else.
Owen widened his eyes in surprise, then closed them and smiled charmingly.
“I trust you.”
“You seemed like you couldn’t trust me earlier.”
“It just felt surreal.”
When she stumbled over her surprised face, he responded curtly.
“I told you. I can see emotions in your eyes.”
“…That’s true.”
“You always want to have me, dominate me, possess me like a treasure. How could I doubt when I see that in your eyes?”
“…”
Lucia fell silent.
Owen’s story was entirely true, leaving Moore with no way to refute it.
There was no need to argue.
“…Doesn’t it bother you at all?”
She was only curious.
Always obsessed, desiring possession, and disliking being seen by others.
Wouldn’t her attitude of jealousy and possessiveness be bothersome?
“Not at all. It’s rather close to being happy.”
“….”
Taken aback by the unexpected answer, Lucia sighed softly and spoke.
“Your taste is truly a bit peculiar.”
“I hear that quite often.”
“…Do you enjoy obsession? Possessiveness or jealousy?”
Owen remained nonchalant.
It was almost hard to believe he had been crying earlier.
“I don’t particularly enjoy obsession itself. Possessiveness and jealousy are the same.”
“But why on earth….”
“It’s better when it’s you, Lucia. It’s good when you’re jealous, obsessed, and possessive. I dislike it when others do it. It’s only natural, isn’t it.”
At his subsequent explanation, Lucia felt a bit dazed.
Truly, Owen loved her more than she had ever imagined.
His love was vast and encompassing, enough to embrace all the ways she loved, even if she found them awkward.
“You seem puzzled.”
“…A bit. Even I find the way I love a bit awkward.”
Lucia knew that her way of wanting to possess someone was quite dictatorial.
It wasn’t much different from loving.
Selfish and self-centered.
To the point where the other might feel fear.
“Then try thinking the opposite for once.”
Seeing her struggling to understand, Owen spoke.
“What if I were to be jealous and obsessed with you?”
“Oh….”
She had never seen Owen being possessive and jealous.
He wasn’t the type to love in that manner.
But….
“It might be nice.”
Why didn’t she dislike it?
Lucia was surprised by her own preferences.
Had she liked this type of person?
It didn’t seem like it.
“Do you want to possess me?”
“That’s fine too.”
From Noble mtl dot com
Goodness.
Lucia suddenly understood Owen.
Owen, who was possessive, jealous, and driven by desire.
It was delightful to imagine.
Even though the affectionate side of him might not do such things, she couldn’t erase the thought that the less affectionate side might be just as appealing.
“Yes, that’s it. It’s because it’s the way the person I love expresses their love.”
With a face of realization, he smiled brightly.
He always looked so clear and pure.
He was a profoundly upright person with a calm and ascetic face.
So she wondered about his reaction, and how much of my greedy and twisted love he could accept.
“I love you, Lucia. All of your ways of loving, even the ones like that.”
The sea was deeper and wider than it appeared.
The end of the deep blue sea was distant and immeasurable.
It might be so intensely dark as to steal away all breath.
Otherwise, it would be impossible to swallow up her hellish passion so easily.
“Shall we set a date for the engagement? If you wish, I’m fine with tomorrow.”
“…Tomorrow won’t work, but let’s set it as soon as possible. I’m fine with announcing the engagement right away.”
Though she already belonged to someone, she still wanted to hold on tighter.
No one would accept and understand themselves to this extent.
I could be sure that I would never meet someone who loves, understands, and desires her like this again.
And likewise.
“Everyone should know that you are mine.”
She also seemed like she wouldn’t be able to find someone who loves her like this.
She didn’t want to miss out on a love that was so passionate and fiery, it could sweep everything away.
* * *
“You look good together, Your Grace.”
That afternoon, the Duke of Verdin visited the boutique.
Thanks to the willing staff at the undoubtedly busy Stella Boutique, Lucia was able to try on all the clothes she desired.
“Is that so?”
“Yes, the color suits you perfectly, Your Grace. Any color suits you well, but…”
“If there were colors that didn’t suit me, it would be hard to be called ‘the Empire’s flower.'”
“True words.”
Lucia knew her appearance well.
She casually brushed off the compliments from the staff and brought up another topic.
“By the way, Stella Boutique doesn’t usually do house calls, right?”
“…Generally, that’s the case.”
“Why was today an exception? Because of the rain? Even so, there must have been reserved customers at Stella Boutique.”
After Lucia’s remark, the staff hesitated for a moment before speaking.
“Can I be honest with you?”
“Go ahead.”
With a nod of consent, the staff carefully chose their words.
“It was said to directly visit the people of the boutique, indicating the need for new clothes… Stella Viscount mentioned that there wouldn’t suddenly be a need for clothes for the Duke of Verdin, Your Grace.”
If it was Stella Viscount, it must have referred to the owner of Stella Boutique.
“He seemed quite perceptive. Both the staff and him.”
As a VIP of Stella Boutique, Lucia had seen Stella Viscount quite frequently.
She was notably sharp among the boutique owners, which might be why the staff hired such exceptional individuals.
“So, you realized that Lady Edelte would be here. Of course, since the maid who came to deliver the message said she needed women’s clothes, it was easy to guess.”
“So, did you rush here for that reason?”
“Because he is the Duke of Verdin and she is Lady Edelte. If they could both be mentioned in the news of the two families’ union, it would be an honorable matter, as Viscount mentioned.”
It seemed Stella Viscount had already foreseen everything.
To spread the rumors of Lucia and Owen spending time together at the boutique.
The news of the two would undoubtedly spread far and wide among the nobles, and if the boutique’s name could also spread along with it, that would be desirable.
“You’re quick to catch on. I like that.”
“I’m sure Viscount will see it as an honor, Your Grace.”
“You too.”
“Oh, really?”
As the staff blinked in surprise, Lucia gave a faint smile.
“You must have wanted to look good to me, right?”
“You even caught onto that… how embarrassing.”
The staff covered their cheeks, pretending to be embarrassed.
Such calculated and shameless people appealed to Lucia.
Those who knew how to take advantage of opportunities and situations would be useful in many ways.
“From now on, you’ll be in charge of me. Let Viscount know that.”
“It’s an honor, Your Grace.”
The boutique staff received incentives based on a certain percentage of the items purchased by the customer they served.
As a VIP, Lucia was naturally a preferred customer for many staff members.
“I’ll take everything I’ve tried on. Please bill it under my name.”
“Well, that’s…”
It was the moment before signing for payment.
The staff hesitated and spoke.
“The Duke of Verdin has already signed. He said to put it under his name no matter how much you buy.”
“…He’s quite fast.”
Lucia briefly clicked her tongue and glanced around the hall again.
To display dresses, gowns, shoes, and jewelry, Owen had opened the banquet hall.
As Lucia looked around at the clothes filling the hall, she asked the staff.
“Besides these, do you have men’s wear?”
“We don’t have suits or formal wear, but we brought tie pins and cufflinks. Would you like to see them?”
As expected, the staff and owner of Stella Boutique were quick-witted.
When Lucia nodded, a box that had been neatly arranged on one side opened.
“We’ve engraved ruby with black patterns. These cufflinks are separated for you, as I thought you’d like them, Your Highness.”
“I like them. I’ll take these. What about the tie pin?”
“I brought this. It’s a design made elegantly with silver.”
“I’ll take this one as well.”
Stella Boutique knew Lucia’s taste excessively well.
She decided to buy both the cufflinks and tie pin brought by the staff and made the payment.
“Put my name on these two.”
“Yes, of course. Would you like them gift-wrapped as well?”
“That would be nice.”
The staff instructed others who had come along to do the gift-wrapping.
Then, they handed over all the clothes that had been brought to the maids.
It seemed like they were going to place them in the dressing room of the bedroom assigned to Lucia.
“Here you go.”
“Thank you for your hard work today.”
“Oh no, it’s nothing.”
The boutique staff greeted and stepped back.
Lucia left the hall holding two well-wrapped boxes.
Since Owen had cleared the space for her to try on and choose clothes herself, he was probably in the study.
“It’s still raining.”
The rain that had been pouring since morning was still coming down heavily.
Though Owen was a bit worried, he left it as it was since he said it was fine when he was with people.
It must have been due to the sudden rain yesterday morning.
He said he would stay with the butler, so it should be fine.
Thinking so, Lucia moved up the stairs.
“Oh, is that a gift for His Highness?”
When she reached the fifth floor, a knight in the corridor asked with surprised eyes.
Lucia observed the knight’s appearance carefully.
“It seems like he was a knight commander, am I right?”
It seemed like she had seen him once at a hunting competition.
“Yes, that’s correct. I’m Jade, Your Highness.”
“Sir Jade. Are you here to report?”
“Yes, that’s right. I was waiting for a while as the butler seemed to be in conversation with you.”
“I see…”
Even though I couldn’t hear anything, it seemed like knights had a bit of a different sensory perception.
Lucia nodded once and continued speaking.
“But why were you so surprised?”
“Well, it’s… It seems that His Grace treasures what you’ve sent, Your Highness.”
“Because of that?”
She found it strange as it was a rather trivial reason.
Well, if it was Owen, it might not be so surprising.
He is a very affectionate person and cares for my people just as much.
“Well… I’m not sure how to explain it, but there’s a room. A room with a cabinet.”
However, Lucia had to reconsider her thoughts at the following words.
“You’ve sent a lot of things as gifts to that room. How dearly you must have cared, everyone was taken aback.”