32. Decline
32. Refuse
“Hmm…”
When I came to my senses, what I saw before my eyes was an unfamiliar ceiling.
The smell of medicine stinging the nose.
“…”
Anyway, it seemed that the memory was the last to collapse.
And the place you are now is probably around the infirmary of Forestry School.
I tried to stand up.
“Ugh!”
But immediately I had no choice but to lie down again as the muscles in my body screamed.
It seems like he is paying the price for overexerting himself to the limits of his body.
It was inevitable to save Morish*ta Sakura, so I don’t have any regrets.
Come to think of it, she…
“Huh? Are you awake?”
A woman who seemed to be a teacher in the nurse’s room walked over the curtain surrounding her bed and approached me, as if she had heard my moaning earlier.
“Are you okay?”
“Except for some muscle pain, it seems to be fine.”
“Really? Then it’s fortunate. It’s definitely because I was young, and I woke up right after I collapsed. It’s morning, so you can think of me as waking up after a good night’s sleep.”
Fortunately, it didn’t seem like it had been that long since he collapsed.
“Ah… That’s right. I’m glad. Well, I’m sorry, just in case.”
“That girl?”
“Ah, yes…”
As if she had predicted what I was going to say, she cut me off and smiled, she said.
“That child, I heard you saved him? It’s cool~. Thankfully, he was rescued quickly, so he doesn’t seem to have any problems with his health. Just to the extent that he’ll get better when he wakes up?”
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“Ha…”
I let out a sigh of relief at her words.
I was very fortunate. If she had ever had a big problem, I might have been haunted by her guilt for the rest of her life.
Because somehow, she neglected the subject she knew would happen.
After seeing me relieved, the nurse’s teacher continued.
“I’m still sleeping in the bed next to you. Would you like to go see it? Ah, does your girlfriend hate it?”
To think all patients are treated in the infirmary. As expected, it is like an all-round infirmary unique to Western anime.
By the way… A girlfriend?
“…A girlfriend?”
“Yes, that blue-haired girl. What was her name…? Ah, was it Yoji Inazuke?”
What is this again?
“Why is he…”
“Oh, didn’t you know? Well, it’s only natural that you don’t know. That girl, she just stayed by your side and left. You had a hard time sending it back? You should have seen the expression on the child’s face.”
“Ah…”
To think Iinazuke did that…
Did I make you worry?
I should say thank you later.
I think this is what a 10-year friendship is like.
***
After that, another 30 minutes or so passed, and I got up and joined the schedule of the forest school.
However, he did not directly work due to muscle pain and just sat around quietly.
To Nazuke Ii, she already said thank you.
Even if you look at it, her dark circles have come down and she seems to be slightly emaciated. She got angry at me for the first time in a while.
I told you not to push yourself like that again.
I was glad to see her for the first time in a while, but also felt sorry for her, so I replied that I would know right away.
You were so young, but now you worry about me like that. Something made me feel proud.
I wonder if this is the heart of parents.
“…”
By the way.
Sit still like that.
For some reason, the children looked at me with envy.
… Maybe it’s because it’s known that I’ve cut through her rain and rescued her.
It was better than receiving eyes stained with hatred or jealousy like before…
Still, I can’t help but feel burdened.
***
“A Shujinkoo student?”
“Oh, yes.”
How many hours have passed since you followed the schedule without any activity?
Around the time the sun was rising in the middle of the sky, the nurse who I saw in the morning came to me and said.
“Student Morish*ta just woke up.”
“Oh, that’s good.”
The good news she gave.
Even the uneasiness that remained little by little at the news was all blown away, and a faint smile appeared on my face.
She looked at me like that and smiled her eyes before she said.
“Student Morish*ta wants to see the student. Why don’t you go?”
“Yes? Me..?”
“Yes. As soon as I woke up, only Shujinkoo students were looking for me.”
“…I understand.”
I walked with her to her infirmary.
And inside it.
“Ah, Shujinko!”
Looking at me, Morish*ta Sakura, smiling brightly, was sitting on the bed.
Mr. Ho Shil avoided the seat, saying that we were talking to each other.
The sound of the infirmary door opening and closing again.
With that sound at the end, there was silence between me and Morish*ta.
In the end, I was the one who spoke first.
“…Is your body okay?”
“Oh, yes! It’s okay! Thank you, Shujinko!”
She smiled again at my question and thanked me.
Even while talking to me, your eyes shine brightly. And her blushing cheeks.
“…”
I thought.
It must be that what I was worried about eventually became a reality.
And.
I decided to speak.
In order to end her unrequited feelings as quickly as possible.
“…Morisita.”
“Huh?! Why, Shu, Shujinko-kun! hehehe-.”
“…”
Ha…
How can my heart not hurt?
But, it hurts my heart, but I still have to say it.
“…”
Because it’s for everyone.
…Because I believe so.
Because of this, I had to open this mouth that seemed like I was going crazy because it was heavy.
“…Morish*ta. Don’t like me.”
“Huh..?”
“I don’t want you to like me.”
“…”
She was silent for a while after my words.
She said in a darkened voice.
“…Why.”
“I know you like me. But.”
“I can’t repay that heart.”
“…”
“It’s not because I don’t have a girlfriend.”
“With that senior… Well, there were circumstances like this and that, so we pretended to be dating each other.”
“But, I can’t like anyone. Nobody.”
“It’s just been that way from the beginning. I can’t change it no matter who wants to change it or I want it, probably.”
“Sure.”
“Don’t like me too much.”
“It will only hurt you.”
“…”
“…Because it’s for you.”
That’s when my words ended.
She trembled with her head down.
The girl with those bright eyes and blush from earlier was nowhere to be found.
Only the girl who looked infinitely sad was left.
Perhaps she will listen to me now and give up on me.
It hurts a bit, but
I couldn’t help it.
Yeah, it’s fortunate that it ended at this point.
How long has it been since I was thinking like that?
The woman who had been keeping her silence opened her mouth.
“I hate it.”
“Huh..?”
Her answer was unexpected.
I was taken aback by that answer.
“No, it will only hurt you?!”
“I hate it.”
“…”
“But… I hate it.”
Below her head, tears flowed one by one. I was soaking the blanket.
“I can’t… I can’t…”
“But it will get better someday…”
“Hey, Shujinko-kun.”
“Huh..?”
The girl who cut me off.
She raised her head as she called my name.
And her face is revealed.
She had an unknown face, her eyes crying but her mouth smiling.
She said.
“I am, Shujinkoo-kun.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t think Shujinko-kun will ever give up, never.”
“I may look stupid.”
“I am.”
“…Have you already liked Shujinko-kun?”
“Because my heart is getting bigger and bigger, I like it so much and I like it.”
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“…Have you already become helpless?”
“I’m so happy when I’m with Shujinko-kun, but I’m so sad when I’m not with you?”
“So, Shujinko-kun.”
“Please don’t say that. Please…”
“It’s okay if you don’t like me.”
“It’s okay to have a girlfriend.”
“I think I know why Shujinko-kun said that.”
“Thank you for being considerate.”
“But, but.”
“I’d rather not be reciprocated by Shujinkou-kun’s heart.”
“…Is it more frightening to be separated from Shujinko-kun?”
“So, it’s okay if you don’t reciprocate my feelings.”
“Just, don’t avoid my heart.”
“Even if you have a heart that likes me, please don’t avoid the coming day too much.”
“Please.”
“Please…”
And her words ended there.
“…”
***
The forest school is over.
And all the students, including me, got on the bus.
The bus we rode in was speeding along the highway.
“…”
The scenery outside the window that changes moment by moment.
Looking at the scenery, I was lost in thought.
To Morish*ta Sakura’s request, I replied that I would eventually understand.
I don’t know if it was the right thing to do. Rather, it might have been an option that would make her even more unhappy.
However, her face as she asked me was so earnest and sorrowful.
I couldn’t refuse.
“…”
Ha…
It was a truly difficult forest school.
***
It’s Saturday.
The day the forest school ended was Friday, so a day had passed.
Today, I spent a hectic day resting to relieve the accumulated fatigue.
Ii Nazuke also remembered my collapse, so she told me to get some rest and didn’t touch me.
Thanks to that, it was a day where I could relax and rest for the first time in a while.
It was a very happy day.
***
And then another Sunday morning.
“After… You can.”
I got up early in the morning and was getting ready to go out.
It is 6 o’clock now.
I don’t know if she’s asleep or awake.
I just pay the utmost attention so that I can go out quietly without being caught.
For this reason, I did not even come out of the room once after I woke up. Because I can’t hear it.
“After…”
Be quiet. Quietly open the door
I can’t feel the presence.
And pass in front of her door.
Careful, careful.
Clap-
Kikki-
“…”
“What are you doing, Shujinko?”
“…You weren’t sleeping..?”
“Yeah, I usually don’t sleep much.”
“…”
The last 10 years, I have completely failed in the fact that I did not know.
I think I slept a lot when I was younger…
“Ha…”
I can’t help it now that it’s like this. Go to the second operation.
“Oh, actually I’m going to meet some friends.”
“Friends? Who?”
“Just, what… Here and there…”
“Hey-.”
After that, she looked into my eyes.
It was as if he was trying to discern her lies.
“…”
How long has it been since you looked at me like that? She said, nodding her head.
“Um~ Okay, then. Well done.”
I let out a sigh of relief at her words.
I wondered what would happen if I pretended that he would follow me wherever I went, just like in the old days.
I don’t know if I was rather scared because there was one person who could tell the difference by looking at the real eyes instead of the fake contemplative nobleman.
Well, can such a person be common?
Anyway, it was fortunate.