121 – Reality
The first thing I reflexively said after coming to my senses was.
“That’s a joke.”
I wanted to deny the current situation.
No, I couldn’t even say it properly.
Because my real body, which has been awake for the first time in a while, is weak enough to put a strain on my vocal cords even when I speak.
It was difficult even to slowly raise my hand and bring it into my field of vision.
“This, what, hey.”
It would not be an exaggeration to say that only skin is attached to the bones, so skinny arms.
Fruppy black hair that tickled his eyes.
It was my body that I saw after 5 years.
“Lies, words… !”
Are you saying it was all a dream?
That can’t be.
Raina’s words, actions, eyes, and lips.
Everything is so vivid, it can’t be a dream.
“Ha, ah….”
I grabbed the handle of the bed with all my might and stood up.
Then what caught my eye was a smartphone that had been charged for some reason.
I barely reached out and picked up the smartphone, but the weight made my arms numb.
It must have been a smartphone at best, but it was to the point where I thought it was heavier than Neia, a claymore.
Tuk, tok.
When I touched the screen twice, the black screen turned into a background that I still feel familiar with.
And I went straight to the homepage of the web novel site.
“This was….”
What I saw there.
“All, reality, was, uh….”
It was the changed ending of ‘She heals the wounded world.’
“A dream, this, it wasn’t, uh… !”
Of course, the main characters of the work were still Sophia and Leon.
It was Sophia and Leon who finally defeated Date.
But beside them, Reina and Ike stood together.
I’m glad.
I’m so glad that what I did wasn’t in vain.
Feeling such relief, I put the heavy smartphone back on the floor.
And right after that.
“… Why?”
A great emptiness came over me, enough to make me vomit.
“What the hell, why… ?”
It must have been me who worked hard enough to save Reina.
Why am I here?
“Ah….”
I don’t like it.
I didn’t want to come back.
“Ahh… !”
From nob le mt l dot com
Please send me back to where everyone is.
“aaa!!!”
From nob le mt l dot com
Please.
I screamed incessantly until the nurse came to see me and heard that I was running amok.
I was diagnosed with a wound in my throat because I was so weak that even talking quietly put a strain on my vocal chords, and I screamed like crazy.
“I will be undergoing rehabilitation for a while.”
And I was able to hear various explanations from the nurse.
I did not die, I underwent surgery, and although the operation was successful, for some reason I never regained consciousness.
The period is 6 months.
For me, who has the feeling of having spent five years, it was a short time like a lie.
“Patient, do you have any questions?”
“… Where is your father?”
“Oh, that….”
At my question, the nurse suddenly closed her mouth and looked away.
It’s as if you’ve been asked a question that’s hard to answer.
“It’s okay, so tell me the truth.”
In the end, at my words, the nurse sighed and answered.
After hearing that even after the operation was successful, his father did not regain consciousness, after paying for his stay in the hospital for two years.
‘If you’ve done this much in over 20 years, I think you’ve put in enough effort.’
She said
And disappeared, saying she was out of news.
Fortunately or unfortunately, thanks to that, I will be able to receive rehabilitation treatment at the hospital.
“… Is that so.”
I let out a sigh, but I didn’t particularly resent my father.
As my father said, he spent more than 20 years working for me, and he disappeared after completing the follow-up perfectly.
Still, it was a pity that we couldn’t have a proper conversation.
I wanted to say thank you.
“Do you have any other questions?”
“… Yes.”
“Then, start by diagnosing your physical condition tomorrow, so please rest well.”
“Yes.”
With those words, the nurse left the hospital room, and I was alone again.
I somehow shook off the feeling of emptiness that was about to come over me again, and I lay down on the bed and stared at the ceiling.
“Who….”
I want you to tell me it’s a dream.
I hope that when I close my eyes and open them again, Reina will greet me with a smile.
I fell back to sleep in such despair.
“….”
What greeted me when I opened my eyes was the cold reality.
★
The day I was discharged from the hospital after a year of rehabilitation, it was snowy in the middle of winter.
What should I do for a living?
What am I supposed to do with my life, having only graduated from middle school and knowing nothing about society?
Only a sigh came out in a desolate mood.
In the end, what I chose was a day job on a construction site.
On the day the rehabilitation was over, the doctor said that I shouldn’t do too much exercise for a while, but I had no choice but to live.
The daily life of going out to the construction site every day in a single room obtained with support from the state.
I had no friends.
I can’t make friends in the first place.
It was a treadmill day in which I woke up at dawn, went to work at the construction site, worked until evening, and then went home and fell asleep from exhaustion.
At least, the manpower workers looked at me as I steadily went to the site, but I couldn’t open my heart to them right away.
I didn’t even have a lover.
Occasionally, the men at the Manpower Corporation said they would like to introduce their daughter to me, but I refused.
I thought that no matter what happened, I would never forget Reina for the rest of my life, and that it would be rude for her to have a relationship with someone else with that kind of heart.
A lonely life with no friends or lovers.
Occasionally, there were times when I thought I wanted to die because the solitude rushed incessantly.
There was a time when I had the same hope that if I died, I might be able to go over again.
But in the end, I still live like this.
I am living even though I feel that my body and mind are getting tired.
And just like that, two years passed.
★
“Maknae! I’m going to grill pork belly today. How about it?”
“Maybe.”
At Uncle Hwang’s recommendation, I replied with a light smile.
Two years was quite a long time.
At least it’s been enough time for me to confide my feelings to the men I work with.
Of course, the emptiness did not completely disappear.
Raina, father, mother, older brother, Sophia, Helen, Leon, Atal, Anna, Alex, Charlotte, dean Ender, senior Andrew, Arbain, Duke Rickard, Rupert, Michelle, etc.
Because all of them were a precious relationship that I will never forget no matter what.
But did you say that humans are creatures of adaptation?
I got used to that emptiness as it became my daily life, and there was me who was able to create a human relationship to the point where I wouldn’t refuse the old men’s invitations to dinner.
The smell of oil that makes your mouth water.
In such a noisy shop, I was eating pork belly with Uncle Hwang alone.
“I am the youngest. This time, the director said he needed an office worker.”
“Yes?”
And when I questioned Uncle Hwang’s sudden words, the uncle snorted and poured his soju into his mouth.
“What example? Hey. Are you still so clueless? That we recommended you for the office job. That’s why I came here to speak as a representative at the right time.”
At Uncle Hwang’s words as if nothing happened, I thought for a moment.
Certainly, if you have an office job, your body will be comfortable.
But if you ask me if I’m doing this while I’m overdoing it, it’s not really that.
First of all.
“I’m sorry, but I didn’t learn anything because I graduated from middle school.”
“It’s okay. Because they teach everything there. They said that if you can do arithmetic, that’s enough.”
Uncle Hwang waved his left hand, as if not accepting objections.
It looked as if he was going to somehow get me into an office job.
“Then wouldn’t it be better for one of the uncles to go, not me? I’m still in my 20s, so even if I roll a little more….”
“Hey man. Because you are young, I recommended you for an office job.”
My own consideration, the man laughed, saying who cares for whom.
Of course, that wasn’t wrong, but it was difficult to understand.
I could say that the Human Resources Corporation, where I belong now, is a very good place.
Right now, whenever the director sends me to the field, isn’t the veteran Uncle Hwang attached?
A desk job in a place like this would definitely make your job much more comfortable.
So I couldn’t understand it any more.
Why am I still only 2 years old in a place like that?
Uncle Hwang opened his mouth as he turned over the pork belly, as if he had noticed my question.
“You know what? When the warden first accepted you, I objected.”
“… Is that so.”
“You know how nice this place is. So sometimes young guys heard rumors and came and made a fuss after working for a day.”
I knew that.
Actually, I’ve seen it a few times.
“So I objected, but the warden said. I don’t think you would. Well, having worked with him for almost 20 years, I know how good his eyesight is, so in the end I nodded too. Instead, they made it a condition that they send me along when they send me to the field. After working together for 20 years, they said they would know this much.”
In other words, the reason I sent Uncle Hwang with me every time I was sent to the site was for my surveillance.
When I thought that, I felt a bit lonely.
“Man. I know what you’re thinking, but don’t show it on your face. In the first place, the warden said there would be no problems, but it was because we were stubborn.”
“It’s okay. Even though I feel lonely, I think it is possible, and I am not particularly resentful.”
“Hey.”
At that, Uncle Hwang hit my forehead with his index finger and snorted at her.
“It hurts.”
“I hit you because it hurts, you bastard. Don’t you understand Now we know what kind of guy you are, and we believe in you. In the first place, this office job itself was almost prepared for you.”
Ah, let me say this myself, Mr. Hwang said and scratched his head.
“All of the guys who have worked here for a long time have children your age. But seeing you go out to the field every day and work for two years, wouldn’t we think anything of it?”
“Well, that would be it.”
“That’s why we almost forcibly created the place. I know what kind of guy you are.”
“Thank you. But….”
“Man. As you said earlier, you are still in your 20s. Very young I thought there were plenty of possibilities there. So that’s what I’m telling you. No matter how much I knew my personality, if I didn’t have the ability, I wouldn’t have said such a thing.”
So, telling me to think about it, Uncle Hwang poured soju into my glass.
After drinking with Mr. Hwang, I returned home and threw myself on the blanket on the floor.
“… It’s an office job.”
I can’t refuse.
You told me that much, but if you refuse, Mr. Hwang loses his face.
“Ha ha.”
It was definitely a good thing.
In the end, it meant that I was recognized by the men I worked with.
But for some reason, I felt a bit regretful.
With such a complicated state of mind, I quietly fell asleep.
★
“… Mmm.”
When I opened my eyes, what I saw was a pure white space.
There, my body, which I got used to after 3 years, was standing there.
“It’s the first time I’ve seen it like this.”
On the other side stood Ike Axus with a taciturn expression.