51 – Nightmare 4
I don’t know the idols’ names.
I don’t know where the idols live.
I don’t know where the idols meet the priests.
“If I had asked yesterday, would it have been different….. sigh.”
I hate myself.
I deny myself.
Because I wanted to abandon myself, the characteristics of a clown slowly engulfed me.
Thump, thump, thump, thump.
I didn’t know the idols’ names, but I had one way to find them.
Searching the entire alley.
The alley was too wide for me to search alone, so I asked people in the alley.
“Do you know where the little kids are?”
I asked politely and courteously.
But my actions were not so.
I grabbed and pushed people against the wall as I spoke.
I asked quite a few people in the alley, but no one knew about the kids.
For people busy living day by day,
interest in others was a luxury.
Dada – da – dadada.
“Haah…. Haah……”
The running pace slowed down.
Breathing became labored.
It had been hours since I began searching for the kids.
But my body didn’t stop.
Then, a voice came from behind me.
“Go… Oppa…”
It was a familiar voice.
A voice that always expressed gratitude with a bright smile.
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I turned my head in the direction of the voice.
There, a girl with a large hole in her chest was staggering towards me.
I immediately ran towards her and embraced the cold girl.
Just as I was about to ask what was happening.
“Ueoeoeoeo.”
Someone else was approaching with a strange sound.
My body, smelling the thick scent of blood, drew the sword.
Srrung.
“No… Don’t.”
The girl blocked my hand holding the sword with her entire body.
I couldn’t understand the reason.
“uuuh.”
When I saw him making strange sounds, I realized why.
Thud.
The sword I was holding fell helplessly to the ground.
“Ah……….”
The boy was walking towards me, his eyes unfocused.
There was blood on the old sword that I had been carrying to protect the girl.
I couldn’t sense any vitality from the boy.
The boy was already dead.
In this world, there were people who could move the dead.
Necromancers.
The corpses controlled by necromancers were usually made of bones.
It was easier to control them that way.
But the boy was different.
He looked like a living person at first glance.
A corpse with flesh attached, not just bones.
There was only one person among the necromancers who used that kind of technique.
“Mordor!!”
My body screamed out the name of the necromancer who had turned the boy into this.
The necromancer’s criteria for selecting corpses were simple.
A stronger corpse. Because a stronger corpse yields greater power.
However, Mordor used the bodies of obviously weak children.
Purely for amusement.
Trembling, my body embraced the girl with hands that could not escape the cunning bastard.
He let the girl go intentionally, just to watch his brother kill her.
Unable to do anything, I trembled, and the lips of the girl, seeing me in that state, parted.
“Masked Oppa, please kill us….”
“What…?”
“If we stay like this, I will end up dead at Oppa’s hands.”
“Why would you die…”
The girl’s body grew colder.
If there were priests nearby, they could save the girl.
But this was an alley.
If I had a potion, I could save the girl.
But I didn’t have any potions.
“Oppa pretended not to have dreams, but I know the truth. Oppa wanted to become a knight protecting countless people.”
Every time the girl spoke, blood spurted from her mouth.
“If I leave Oppa in this state, he will undoubtedly end up killing someone else.”
The warmth from the girl’s body was gradually fading.
“If I die in this state, Oppa will surely think he killed me and mourn from the heavens.”
So, the girl mustered strength throughout her body and uttered her final words.
“So, Oppa, please. Please kill us.”
In my hand, a dagger purchased to be a gift for the boy was held.
The girl’s breath was getting shallower.
As if urging a quick decision.
I took a cloak from the interdimensional space and laid it carefully on the ground, placing the girl on top.
Shivering.
With trembling hands, I brought the dagger to the boy’s heart.
Swish.
The dagger pierced into the girl’s chest.
To make her comfortable, I thought I needed to kill her quickly. However, emotions screamed not to kill the girl.
“….Cough.”
Hesitation.
Upon hearing the girl’s agonizing sounds, my body forcefully drove the knife deep into her heart.
“I promise… I will definitely kill the one who made you like this.”
“………………”
There was no response.
My body, holding a sword with trembling hands, looked at the boy approaching here.
“Ha… ha…”
I observed myself sinking into despair.
Even though I knew I couldn’t escape from this nightmare, I tried desperately to break free.
But, as expected, I couldn’t escape from the nightmare.
I was powerless. I was utterly powerless.
The me in the dream and the me in reality were both powerless.
Since that day, I dreamt the same nightmare every day.
At first, I thought I might be cursed.
However, Duke Adellian said there was no curse on me.
I was too powerless, so I used medicine to avoid the nightmare.
I was too weak, so I turned away from the nightmare using Eirika.
“I have no idea what your trauma is. I know you have no intention of talking about it. But taking medicine will never improve it. Ultimately, to escape the nightmare, you must accept it yourself.”
Duke Adellian said that my subconscious created the nightmare.
And most people who dream such dreams do so to change reality, he said.
“Then why can’t I do anything?”
If dreaming such dreams is to change reality, then why can’t I move, speak, and just watch the situation?
“Ah.”
I realized why I couldn’t do anything in the nightmare.
This wasn’t a nightmare dreamed to change reality, even in a dream.
“This is a punishment I impose on myself.”
It’s a punishment from my subconscious to the pathetic me who couldn’t do anything.
There’s only one way to escape from this punishment.
Accepting reality.
If I accept reality, I won’t dream nightmares anymore.
“Accept reality?”
Accept the reality where, because of my pathetic actions, children died? Accept the reality where I killed those children with my own hands?
Absolutely not.
No, I won’t accept it.
I will never acknowledge the deaths of those children.
Children with dreams.
Children with dreams for others have died, and I cannot accept it.
Even if I use medicine to escape nightmares.
Even if I turn away from nightmares by listening to Erika’s voice.
Even if both are gone, and there’s a chance of dreaming nightmares again.
I will never accept reality.
.
.
.
Yohanna followed Loki.
Since they were running on the roof, there was no difficulty in pursuit.
Thud!
Loki entered a certain store.
Yohanna, seeing that, descended from the roof and entered the store Loki had gone into.
It was a store vibrating with the smell of alcohol.
Despite the considerable number of people, it was quiet.
‘Loki.’
Yohanna tried to find Loki, and finding Loki was easy because everyone in the store was staring at him.
“Information Guild, spill the information.”
Loki had someone by the collar, speaking.
People who seemed like mercenaries were trembling because of the aura Loki was emitting.
‘Information Guild, is this the place?’
Yohanna knew about the Information Guild.
A guild with all kinds of information.
But who the members of that guild were.
No one knew where the Information Guild was or who was in it.
“Guest, in our store, it’s not the Information Guild but a regular pub…
“If you don’t reveal the information right now, I’ll spread the word about where the Information Guild is and who’s in it across the empire, no, across the entire continent.”
Roki interrupted the waiter and spoke.
Step by step.
“That’s enough.”
An old man in the corner of the bar walked over.
“I am the 33rd eye. I don’t know what information you want, but just like this…….”
“Garam, that’s your name. I won’t talk for long. Give me the information right now.”
Clang.
Roki placed a bag of gold coins on the table and said.
The old man was surprised that Roki knew his name.
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And he was surprised again when he saw the amount of gold coins Roki pulled out.
“Hmm, with this amount of money…….”
But he didn’t show it.
Seeing Roki easily take out this amount of money made him think that he could get more if he did well.
“Enough.”
“……….!”
When the man opened his mouth in front of him, that thought disappeared.
From the moment the man entered the store, he exuded vitality.
Because of that vitality, the people employed as combatants by the Information Guild were trembling.
He thought the man deliberately emitted vitality when he entered the store. No, he was mistaken.
The vitality he had felt until now was just the natural aura emitted by the man.
Just a moment ago. The man exhaled real life towards himself.
This man could kill himself right now.
The reason this man didn’t kill himself was simply because he needed information.
Cold sweat dripped.
“What information do you want?”
He nodded.
LET HIM COOOK