123 – 54. Conclusion (1)
In the deep darkness of dawn settling in, Ria Hurst was staring blankly at the night sky.
“Ian, I hope you’re okay.”
Her body was weary, and her head throbbing, making it seem like she could fall asleep at any moment. However, as she laid pondering, worries about Ian kept surfacing, preventing sleep from coming.
To have to offer congratulatory greetings mixed with worries on the day of the solemn ceremony at Hwangdo, where she would be officially crowned, how unfortunate a situation it must be.
Even Ria, who was observing the reality of having to receive well-wishing greetings tinged with concerns, felt her heart ache.
“I’m in a similar situation…. Ian must not be in his right mind.”
It was said that there was discord between Leticia and Ian, but the bond between parent and child was not easily severed.
Even if their relationship was strained, the ties of blood were such that if one lost their life, it would cause a deep shock.
Perhaps the reason Ian hadn’t shown himself all afternoon was also due to that.
“He must be troubled. I thought he wouldn’t be sad. But the heart doesn’t listen.”
As much as she wanted to rush over and embrace him, reassuring him that everything would be fine, she couldn’t rudely intrude into his room when she didn’t know how deep his sorrow was.
There was only one thing Lía Hurst could do for Ian.
“I have to help Ian who’s struggling. Erina Igor is not here now.”
She couldn’t take over the Volkanov family’s tasks since she was inexperienced, clumsy, and even an outsider. But she could at least lend a hand for the funeral.
In fact, she had spent the afternoon assisting the family’s maids in preparing the food and tools for the funeral.
“Although I don’t know if it’s because I foresaw it, they said preparations are almost at their peak, so now there should be some room to breathe, right?”
Once all preparations were complete, Ian would start to show himself. It would be her turn to sincerely help him through his grief.
“Ugh. Can’t sleep, might as well go out for some fresh air.”
Unable to bear the worry about Ian, who was constantly appearing in her thoughts even when she closed her eyes, Lía couldn’t stay still. She sprung up from the bed.
Since sleep wouldn’t come anyway. Wouldn’t she get tired after a walk around the mansion in the cold wind?
Grabbing a simple coat, she cautiously opened the door and stepped outside.
“Excuse me. May I ask where you’re going?”
“Oh. Can’t sleep, going for a walk.”
“Understood. Please take care.”
“Thank you, you too.”
Nodding briefly at the guard patrolling the corridor, she slowly descended the central staircase.
It was when she finally set foot on the first floor.
“Huh? Why is the light on in the dining room…”
The moment she confirmed a faint light seeping from the first-floor dining room, which she thought would be empty.
Why would the light be on at this hour? Was someone doing something?
“I’m sure I turned it off when I last left? It’s not like they’re already preparing breakfast.”
The maids and guests of the Volkanovs used to come out early in the morning to prepare and eat together in the mansion’s dining room, but it wasn’t to the extent of coming out at 2 in the morning.
Moreover, if they were preparing breakfast, there would have been considerable noise.
“Are they preparing the funeral food in advance?”
For a moment, Lía recalled the words of the maids.
Thanks to her help, the food preparation was almost finished. She had mentioned that she could handle it alone now.
Considering those words, perhaps they were coming out early in the morning to finish preparing the food and then focus on other aspects in the morning.
“Well. If the food is all made and preserved with magic, it can easily last for a few days. There’s not much time left, so maybe they thought of quickly preparing it by coming out alone in the early morning.”
In that case, wouldn’t it be much better to help with the food preparation rather than just walking around?
After all, it would tire her body since she couldn’t sleep.
“I guess helping out would be better.”
Having made up her mind, Lía quietly made her way towards the dining room, so as not to disturb them in the midst of their busy preparations.
As she peeked inside, she could see.
“…”
“Ian?”
“…”
Ian, relying on a single small light, sitting alone and eating stew silently.
Without a response when called, Lía hesitantly entered the dining room.
***
Ian quietly continued to push the stew prepared by Leticia into his mouth for the last time.
It wasn’t because he was hungry or because it tasted good.
As he alternated between reading the letter and the stew, a poignant feeling welled up within him. He had to force himself to eat to hold back tears.
If he were to stop, it seemed like he would burst into tears immediately. That was the moment he kept pushing it into his mouth.
Swish!
“You haven’t even had dinner, so how about eating this instead of just the stew?”
“Lia. Are you awake?”
The moment she quietly approached with food suitable to accompany the stew.
Judging by the steam rising and the smell of the food, it seemed like she had just cooked it.
‘Lia came over and cooked without me knowing. Was she just going to eat this alone?’
He chuckled in disbelief. Lia gazed at him with a worried expression.
“If you were hungry, you should have told me.”
“I wasn’t eating because I was hungry… I was initially just going to drink water. But then, when I opened the fridge, I found this along with the letter.”
“…The letter.”
“Mother left it as her last before she passed…. Isn’t it absurd? If she wanted to have a warm meal, she could have at least said so. What’s the point of leaving it secretly? It could have rotted if we found it late.”
“Ian….”
“At first, I was puzzled and wanted to get rid of it. Strangely, when I read the letter, I couldn’t bring myself to throw it away. So, I had no choice but to eat it. I started to dislike myself for getting emotional every time I forced it in.”
Leticia was detestable.
It wasn’t an emotion he held as a human.
There was a separate reason for his feeling of dislike.
If she was going to leave, and if she was going to close her eyes so emptily, why was it so difficult to say, ‘I’ll make food, eat before you go’? Why leave without a simple word like that?
“Even if you’re afraid, at least say something.”
He found her selfish act of leaving out of fear detestable and, at the same time, he didn’t like that he was simply eating the last meal she left behind.
As anger and frustration mingled, Ian clenched the spoon tightly, trembling.
“Could it be… that it was meant to be that precious?”
“What?”
He looked at her, his tremors subsiding at Lia’s words.
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“It was precious.”
“Perhaps she wanted to feed you herself while looking at your face. But maybe she realized it was impossible. So, she prepared this much, thinking it might suffice.”
“If it was truly precious, wouldn’t it be better to just say it?”
“I may not be able to read Ian’s mother’s mind since I’m not her, but at least if it were me, I would want to leave with only happy memories with my son. Once I close my eyes, I won’t see him forever. It would be regretful to leave with lingering feelings.”
Perhaps it was for that regret….
“If it was so precious that….”
Because the last moment spent with him was so precious, because she didn’t want to leave any regrets, did she leave like this?
“Damn it….”
Tears he had been holding back suddenly burst out, and Ian bowed his head deeply.
“It’s okay. You can cry now, Ian.”
Starting with trembling hands, Lia embraced him, feeling time pass quietly.
***
It didn’t take long for the poignant feeling to subside.
Ian, who had suppressed all his emotions for about ten minutes, regained his composure.
He was resolving the uneaten dinner while chatting with Ria.
“I should be the one helping with the funeral preparations for the departed. I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s fine. Since we still have time left, I really don’t mind.”
“I’ve been so preoccupied that I didn’t have the chance to worry, but I’ve received great help.”
Realizing the regained energy in Ian’s demeanor as he continued talking with a small smile, Ria also revealed a relieved expression.
“I think I can help until the funeral is over. So, there’s no need to worry until then.”
“Until then. And after that?”
“It’s not confirmed yet, but… honestly, I’m thinking of taking some time off.”
“Time off?”
What time was she referring to?
“Do you have something you need to do?”
“Yeah. I’m considering taking a leave of absence and traveling around the continent.”
“Traveling around the continent.”
Traveling around the continent. Ian’s shoulders twitched at those words.
“If the purpose is to enhance your skills, wouldn’t it be unnecessary to take a leave of absence? You could go during the vacation if it’s for travel.”
“It’s not just for travel. The reason for traveling around the continent is to improve my abilities.”
“If it’s for skill improvement, it’s not a strange idea, but…”
While it’s true that the Empire is home to many skilled individuals, it doesn’t mean that there are only those with remarkable abilities. From the Elves of Dalsurim to places like Edenria where powerful minority races gather, there are other places worth noting.
For example, there’s recently absorbed Bisyan, known as a sanctuary of martial arts. Even the Duke of Vernokia went there to seek knowledge.
Traveling the continent would undoubtedly lead to significant progress in training. This is an undeniable fact.
However, even though Ian found it challenging to fully support Ria’s journey, as if understanding his feelings, Ria also tried to smile and speak.
“I want to be someone important to Ian.”
“You are one of the most important people to me.”
“Well, that’s fortunate. But I don’t just want to be someone you care about. Ultimately, I want to be someone who can help you.”
“Help me?”
“Lately, I’ve been thinking. Compared to others, I feel like I’m lacking in many aspects. I’m not skilled in swordsmanship to help you, nor am I particularly exceptional at handling tasks.”
Honestly, Ria felt she wasn’t of much help to Ian.
Just look at those around her; isn’t it clear she falls short?
“I’m not that remarkable. Eri is good at handling spirits, excels in studies… and above all, she’s always there to help you. But I make a lot of mistakes, don’t I?”
In handling tasks, in prowess, in every aspect, she was overshadowed. The only good thing was that Eri’s true identity had become unattainable once revealed.
Isn’t it because of the comparison with Eri?
Even compared to Celia, Reyna, and Bianca, the only side that could be considered superior was the family background.
Even Celia, the master of spear arts, belonging to the prestigious Wignoran family, one of the pillars of the Empire, couldn’t be compared to the Husted family.
“Of course, Celia did hurt Ian, though.”
At least she flew into battle with Satan to protect Ian.
What did he do compared to himself?
“I am far from enough… No matter how fine Ian is. I also want to be helpful.”
Just watching from the side, she never really gave Ian much help.
That fact was gradually gnawing at Ria’s self-esteem.
“So I decided to travel around the continent for a while. I thought that if I improved my skills by traveling to various places, I might be able to gain something that could help you.”
“…Ria.”
“It’s a bit sad to leave… But it can’t be helped.”
With a darkened complexion, Ria struggled to speak. Finally, she threw the last question.
“So by the way, Ian. You won’t forget me even if I leave, right?”
Are you okay? There was only one answer Ian could give to that question.
“Ria… So, is that the end of the reason? Wanting to be someone helpful to me.”
“Huh? Uh….”
“If that’s really the whole reason why you want to be helpful to me.”
“…”
“Don’t go anywhere, stay by my side.”
Ria’s eyes widened at Ian’s words.