683 – 8. Last Words (57)
The shadow of the fire flickers in the open air at night.
Once again, I am in an unfamiliar memory. As you emerge from the long plain stained with blood and pollution, ruins with traces of civilization appear. It was the present day of decline of a once prosperous territory.
A corpse with only bones left, blood drawing strange shapes, and even a building with clear scorch marks.
I didn’t know what happened here. However, it was clear that the scenery that day was not very pleasant. Because the Dark Church was not a herald of freedom and liberation.
They were apostles of self-indulgence and sin. Perhaps terrible atrocities that are hard to see were committed here too.
The sad truth is that my heart was so peaceful when I naturally remembered that scene. It’s as if we’re all too familiar with tragedies now.
So I didn’t even know if I had agreed to the conversation with Emma.
The fact that I could still use my voice and accept the woman’s mysterious smile seemed like proof that I was human.
“How many people have ever attempted the ‘Test of the Dragon’? Among them, there was a sage from the tower, and there was also a shaman who trained in a hideout on the continent. But they say that within just a few minutes of looking into His Majesty’s eyes, they screamed and their brains melted.”
Today’s topic was ‘Test of the Dragon.’
‘Blind Snake’ Shien lost both his eyes during an attack by the Dark Church while attending the academy. She lived in darkness for several years, and it is said that in her despair she gained an epiphany.
In later times, the world gave it a name, ‘the eye of all things.’
What appears in her empty eyes is said to be the road leading to the ‘boundary’. It is said that the eyes of truth, which see through everything, reveal the truth of the world even though they have only encountered it.
Of course, it was just a hypothesis.
In fact, there was no one who looked into those eyes and survived.
A great wizard, a renowned sage, and an alchemist searching for the ultimate substance.
All died with pieces of melted brain bleeding from her eyes and nose. Glancing at the ‘truth’ might have been just as dangerous and painful.
That is the ‘Test of the Dragon’.
It was a death test that no one could pass, if only he could safely look into the woman’s empty eyes.
“He was a scary person… Is it that strong? “That princess.”
I burst into laughter at Emma’s languid sentiment.
Strong?
“Extremely.”
The Master was basically no different from a natural disaster that even changed the terrain. Even Sien was evaluated as being special among them.
It was simply because the greatest power of mankind belonged to the empire. We only had a few battles together, but from what I remember, she was someone worth fighting for.
It was enough to make you question whether other power was really necessary.
There was a reason why everyone chose ‘Dragon King’ as the strongest among the three masters called ‘new generation’. Although ‘Ghost Sword’ and ‘Silver Saint Woman’ also performed great miracles.
But Emma seemed to feel strangely disappointed in the fact that the princess was strong.
“He’s that strong, why can’t he save everyone?”
“Your Highness is doing your best. Of course I…….”
“What if a commoner girl was in a coma?”
Chuck.
I was caught off guard and couldn’t find anything to say. Even though Emma was only smiling faintly.
“But did he even care? If not, what about you? “If you call her a useless commoner girl.”
A useless commoner girl?
It wasn’t worth discussing. Even at this moment, there are probably many commoners whose lives are in danger. Isn’t it realistically impossible to pay attention to each of these things?
Nevertheless, why couldn’t I easily open my mouth?
He pursed his lips, sighed, and finally avoided eye contact and that was the one word he uttered.
“…… Sorry.”
“Huh?”
As if asking why, light green eyes are following me. I decided to be thankful that I was finally able to properly express my regrets from that day.
“For not being able to save you.”
Emma finally understood what I meant and let out a mysterious laugh.
He said it was nothing special.
“Ah, then? I told you, you don’t need to worry too much. You probably had your own circumstances, too. There’s no need to worry about a useless commoner girl……..”
“Because she wasn’t a useless commoner girl.”
It was my true feelings that I could not bear to express for a long time.
Emma pursed her lips, and her eyes deepened as she looked at me. It was difficult for her to read what was inside.
“No, actually… It didn’t matter whether it was useful or not. The reason I couldn’t save you wasn’t because you were a commoner girl… It was simply because I didn’t have the strength. “I wanted to say sorry at any time.”
“…… Why?”
“He said he was sorry for not being able to save him. “I wanted to save you.”
I bowed my head slightly and offered a belated apology.
When I heard that Emma was in her coma, I knew I wanted to save her. However, after graduating without being able to accomplish anything, I couldn’t even bring myself to find out what happened to Emma.
Because I was scared.
“I’m sorry. Actually, I could have apologized sooner. Because I’m a coward…….”
“No.”
A cold voice.
The warmth was slowly fading from the face of the woman who always had a smile on her face. Eventually, with a cold expression on her face, Emma looked at me with a straight face and spoke.
“Don’t apologize. “It’s a lie, right?”
It was a change in attitude so drastic that it seemed like it was out of the blue.
I had never seen Emma like this before, so I couldn’t help but be embarrassed.
“Emma, I’m not lying… ….”
“It’s a lie.”
Without even the slightest emotion, Emma declared that without even blinking.
“No, it has to be a lie.”
Even a faint insanity could be felt in Emma’s voice as she mumbled like that. I couldn’t figure out the cause of that obsession, so I couldn’t say anything for a while.
Emma’s hand slowly raised her body and grabbed her by the collar.
The woman’s delicate facial features were soon before my eyes. There was a faint spark sparkling in her eyes.
A heated tone flows out through clenched teeth.
“You nobles have no interest in us commoners, do you? They only offer sympathy and pity, like throwing food to pigeons… But, what? Are you sorry for not being able to save you? Do not be ridiculous.”
“Emma, I… ….”
“Do I look like such an idiot who doesn’t know the world? Just saying a few hypocritical words made me feel embarrassed and made me look like an idiot who didn’t know what to do! No, no! You only use your cheap tongue and actually sacrifice nothing for us… Nothing! Same for you, Ian? You too in the end…… !”
It was right then.
In an instant, the sight before my eyes flashed white, and then a fierce pain shocked my nerve endings and struck my brain. I couldn’t even scream, I just vomited out blood and torn internal organs.
Side effects of the ‘created God’ plan.
It was the price of putting all kinds of images into one body. The reason the princess gave her Emma to me was to suppress this side effect, so Emma had no choice but to be unaware of this fact.
But why did Emma keep her eyes wide open?
Although she was a bit taken aback, Emma was a skilled pharmacist. She immediately poured her reagent into my mouth to give her first aid, then quickly rummaged through her luggage and pulled out a simplified alchemy tool.
It took about an hour until my seizures subsided.
While I was gasping for breath due to the intense pain, Emma, who was organizing the lotus root technique tools, suddenly scolded me.
“…… “You’re stupid.”
It was a tone in which it was difficult to find any enthusiasm or divergence any longer.
In a voice that seemed to have lost all strength, the woman continued to beat me.
“Why do you do such a foolish thing? I told you, you’ll die… I mean this sincerely. Now, forget about war and humanity, and just get medical care so that you can survive the rest of your life.”
From Noble mtl dot com
I guess so.
It was very clear that my body had already reached its limit. Since I wasn’t a child, I already had a good sense of what my body was like to the point where I hated it.
Nevertheless, this is why I can’t give up.
“Because I don’t want to lose anything anymore.”
That was my true, unconcealed intention.
My precious people and lives that I had to let go of because I had no strength until now.
I didn’t want to blame myself anymore. I didn’t want to be left alone and live in this hell.
“Anything, including you… “I don’t want to be unable to save you because I no longer have the strength.”
It was okay to say it was a childish motive.
I have lost too much and been hurt too much. It was natural to want euthanasia rather than a life filled with pain.
Yes, it would have been nice to die like this. There was a sick person inside me who truly thought it would be better if it were that way.
After Emma heard my confession, she was silent for a long time.
I was just organizing my tools in silence, and I couldn’t help it anymore and just let out a light sigh.
“…… “Ian.”
There was no answer. Emma wasn’t so clueless that she didn’t even notice that I was listening.
“I never do this to other people… I really need to tell you this. Even if it’s stupid, it’s too stupid.”
You’re stupid.
It was something I had heard countless times from Leto, but when I heard it from Emma, the sentiment was different. I’ve heard it a few times before, but it feels a little different today.
It was a sincere tone.
“If the time comes to abandon me again… Throw it away without hesitation. “Don’t do anything strange.”
“Why?”
“If you tell me to do it, just do it.”
It was impossible to resist the eyes that were looking at me like that.
Just stay silent and then say one word.