＜Episode 24＞ The Unaware Mind
[Si-eun]
“ha… … .”
He sighed as he stirred the chocolate in the pot.
These days, I keep sighing. It is said that if you breathe a lot, luck will run away. Maybe my luck has already run out.
All of this is Hwimin’s fault for making him sigh.
After returning home last weekend, Hwimin’s attitude became awkward.
He’s a very incompetent person, but he often chatted with me. Occasionally, I used to throw jokes mixed with jokes.
For some reason, he hasn’t spoken a word for the past few days. No, he doesn’t even talk to me, let alone talk to me.
The reason was clear.
From the day he woke up drunk, Hwimin changed. From then on, I felt that Hwimin’s gaze had changed.
By now, I felt even more distant than before I took on the job of a housekeeper.
What did he say that made Hwimin start to distance himself?
Judging from the various circumstances, the answer was clear.
Read at noblemtl.com
Maybe.Read at noblemtl.com
Maybe i… … .… … He seemed to have made a confession.
Even if it’s drunk, you can’t treat someone who’s drunk as usual. It must have made it difficult for me to face my face because of the uncomfortable feeling.
But I don’t know.
If so… … Do I like Hwimin?
‘When you drink alcohol, you lose control and the words in your mind come out.’
So-hye said that at the drinking party.
Is that really the case?
Did I really have those words inside me?
I tried to look into my own heart, but it was like black chocolate in front of me, and I couldn’t see anything. It’s clear that it’s just heating up hot.
“ha… … .”
Frustrated, he sighed again.
I really can’t stand it. The person who made you sigh must be held accountable.
Thinking like that, I said, “Hey,” I don’t know who to listen to. With a sound, the gas fire was turned off.
◎
smart.
Knock on the door and wait for an answer.
There was a time when I suddenly opened the door without knocking and got into an accident… … . I decided not to open the door recklessly.
The current time is 11:50 p.m. 10 minutes before Hwimin’s birthday.
I had a birthday present for Hwimin in my hand.
Originally, I had no plans to take care of my birthday.
But I heard of my birthday at a drinking party.
It’s my birthday in a week and I’ll be sad if I don’t take care of it. I prepared it for this simple reason. There was no other mind.
After waiting for a while, from the inside of the room, “Come in.” a voice was heard
I wondered what to do if I didn’t let them in, but luckily, that didn’t happen.
He took a breath to clear his mind.
After that, he opened the door, pushed it slightly, and hid the chocolate bag behind his back.
What appears to be the open door is Hwimin, who is guarding the monitor as usual.
Doesn’t even make eye contact It was clear that he was confusing me. But this alone made me feel good. Because these days, we don’t meet face-to-face except during meal times.
“Why are you here?”
It’s a bit of a borderline conversation.
“just.”
I answered as calmly as possible and headed to bed. He looks at me from time to time, but there is no reaction. I was relieved because I didn’t see chocolate.
Hwimin asked quietly as he hid the chocolate inside the blanket.
“what are you doing?”
“Sit down.”
“know. Did you not bring any snacks today?”
“You don’t like snacks anyway. Besides, eating snacks on a late night like this will make you fat.”
“Um, what… … .”
Hwimin doesn’t question him, despite the obvious answer that he’s shivering. Is it a lack of communication skills or a great understanding?
After this, Hwimin turned the chair around as if he didn’t want to say any more.
However, there is still time until Hwimin’s birthday. I couldn’t hand over the present now.
But if you wait silently and throw a present, the reason for coming to this room becomes clear.
He moved to a seat near Hwimin and opened his mouth.
“What are you doing?”
Then Hwimin naturally turned his head. As if they were the same poles of a magnet, they immediately opened up their distance.
I don’t know how much you’re limiting me. At this point, it’s rather sad.
“I am studying economics.”
“okay? There are a lot of curly characters.”
“It’s unknown in Greek, not in cursive letters.”
I tried to buy time with useless words, but it was too much. If that’s the case, I’ll be there just before midnight. A small regret arose.
Heh, I went back to my seat and crossed my legs, but a thought suddenly crossed my mind.
These days, Hwimin doesn’t even want to mix with me. But, he just answered my words in a normal way.
So, you can ask now.
spoke up right away.
“Why are you acting awkward these days?”
Hwimin shuddered and shrugged.
“Well. I want to go back to the concept that I can’t talk about.”
“You’re not a concept, you’re basically unable to speak.”
“Well, it doesn’t.”
“Don’t be kidding, tell me. Why have you suddenly distanced yourself lately?”
“Uh, uh… … .”
That’s a stupid excuse. If it was Hwimin, I would have understood it roughly and moved on, but you shouldn’t expect that kind of generosity from me.
But for Hwimin, it must have been an excuse that he just squeezed his head into. No more answers came.
Then there is no need to wait. I can only ask
“I’m just asking, just in case.”
“Yes.”
“The day we drank, did nothing really happen?”
No one will overhear you, but you will speak in a lower volume. According to speculation… … Because I confessed to Hwimin.
However, even after waiting, Hwimin did not return an answer. He looked like he was thinking deeply about something, but his lips showed no sign of moving.
Frustrated, I finally opened my mouth.
“If, even if. If I had said anything.”
Read at noblemtl.com
Maybe… … If you have confessed“It’s all drunken bullshit. It was never meant to be sincere. So, forget everything.”
“… … .”
It’s not the truth, so I want you to forget it.
I don’t know if it’s true or not… … . What if I made Hwimin, who is not interested in women, only worry about it. So if you’re acting awkwardly. Because I don’t need that kind of heart.
“okay.”
Then, Hwimin nodded and answered.
Also, did I confess?
If so, was that heart sincere?
Just then, a cheap electronic beep sounded in the room.
I looked at my phone and it was 12:00. A clock somewhere in the room must have signaled midnight.
“Ha, really.”
I got a bit frustrated and sighed again. Filled with cramped feelings for both Hwimin and myself, I messed up my hair.
“Um, why?”
Hwimin looked confused.
I glanced at Hwimin like that.
He took out the chocolate hidden in the blanket and held it out.
“receive.”
Hwimin checked the identity of the object.
“… … Is today’s snack chocolate? If you eat at night, you will get fat?”
“What? no.”
what a stupid thing to say Maybe he even forgot his birthday?
He snorted and turned his face away.
“It’s a gift. It’s your birthday.”
Giving a glance, Hwimin opened his mouth as if he understood now.
“I don’t know if I like chocolate because I usually eat anything… … . Still, if I had to ask, I made it because I thought children would like it.”
“It’s not even the taste of a child.”
Well, yes. Any side dish or any dish is always delicious.
“Have you ever made it? Did you make it yourself?”
“okay.”
To be precise, ready-made chocolate is melted, hardened, poured into a mold, and overlaid with letters.
“I made it by secretly buying materials and tools without you noticing. I didn’t notice you because you suddenly started to lock yourself in your room.”
“I see.”
That’s right, this is not the time to say the same thing.
I was so worried that he wouldn’t even meet me face to face. How many sighs It would have cut my lifespan by a few minutes.
I was about to ask for responsibility, but Hwimin said with a light smile.
“So, in the end, you made it for me, didn’t you?”
okay. right.
… … I should have answered, ‘Hwimin’s smile made me a little grumpy.
Why are you laughing so hard by making other people frustrated?
“… … no.”
“no?”
“okay. I made this just to give it to someone, but it was left over so I made it together.”
“Is it written Happy Birthday here?”
“How many people in the world do you think have the same birthday as you?”
Then, Hwimin stopped talking. Also, arguing is weak.
But soon Hwimin burst into laughter as to what he was thinking.
“Why are you laughing?”
“Nothing.”
Why are you laughing at nothing? As he watched with dissatisfaction, Hwimin took the chocolate.
“thank you.”
Looking straight at me with a smiling face.
Hwimin returns an honest thank you.
When I saw it, somehow, it felt like a corner of my heart was melting.
He shook his head at the indescribable feeling and stood up.
“You want to go?”
As I walked to the door, Hwimin asked.
“Would you like more?”
“no. That’s not it. Are you here to give me this?”
Why are you asking something obvious?
Lack of motivation, lack of will, always laughing out loud, always losing in fights. Why are you asking such a quick question?
It’s really frustrating. I want to express this little anger of mine.
With that in mind, I turn my head.
“Think about it. Idiot.”
He was very timid and angry.
I return to my room and lean against the door.
It’s Hwimin who has been acting unnaturally for the past few days, but after visiting and talking to him, it’s no different than before.
That alone made me a little happy.
If it’s just awkward, solving the cause would be enough. Since I told you well today, it would be better if you return it to the way it was from tomorrow.
Last weekend without Hwimin. And this week when Hwimin was away from me.
I thought for some reason that I was lonely.
I’m used to being alone since I was little. There were days when I didn’t see anyone all day. Still, I’ve never felt lonely.
Oddly enough, I felt that way.
It makes me sad that there is no one around me.
A feeling that never existed for me before.
If you give this heart a special name.
that… … .
What is it?