61 – S2. Resentment Wished Upon the Stars -4
After burying the cat’s body in the front yard, the three of them gathered around the bloodstained box in the center.
A creepy warning. A predicted attack is a method that induces a continuous state of tension. It’s like guerrilla tactics used to prevent the enemy from resting during a war.
Therefore, the most certain way is to find it first and deal with it. Bennett stared at the warning message and spoke.
“Can we track the sender?”
[If we receive a little more information. We still don’t have enough. We analyzed the footsteps that went back and forth in front of the mansion, but it was a different person every time. They all seemed to have a certain physique.]
“In summary, they mention a god and seem to be an organization that can manipulate multiple people. It’s so convincing that it’s suspicious.”
As Nioré listened to the analysis, Benett fell into deep thought. Tara, next to him, expressed her anger by banging on the table.
“It’s definitely the work of the Twilight Sect of Silver!”
“Don’t jump to conclusions. The Twilight Sect of Silver has no reason to interfere with the research. Abraham’s research, calculating the speed of an impending cosmic disaster, doesn’t seem religious. This religious message might be a disguise.”
“Then who else could have done it?!”
“Abraham said he was a professor, a scholar. It could be a dispute with another scholar. That would be the closest reason to steal or obstruct the research.”
[But if it was the work of a competing scholar… would they go to such extremes? And even surveil the mansion? There’s no reason to mention a god.]
Nioré’s opinion was valid. Benett nodded in agreement and summed up his conclusion.
“I won’t deny that the Twilight Sect of Silver is suspicious. But we should reach a conclusion only after concrete evidence is found. Mistakes can happen.”
While pronouncing the word “mistakes,” Benett looked at Tara intently. It was a gaze of unease. Nioré had an excessive sense of justice, but compared to the lack of any elements of unease until now, Tara had a clear attachment to Abraham.
However, Benett’s gaze did not reach her. Tara was only biting her nails, thinking of someone who had sent a malicious package to Abraham.
“I don’t care who they are, as long as we catch them, we won’t let them go!”
“Lower your voice, Tara.”
“Aren’t you angry?!”
“There’s no need to be so enraged. They are someone else.”
It had only been three days since they met. Benett swallowed his words.
Furthermore, Abraham was someone from a different world. In the end, attaching emotions would only lead to losses. Moreover, Abraham himself had suspicious circumstances. Why would he continue this research, even while facing such threats, when it meant nothing to an old man?
“There are specific areas we need to focus on. The shining isosceles triangle. We need to investigate what it is, what it looks like, and who possesses it.”
[But how should we investigate?]
“Crazy… the wizard mentioned that in the report. In other words, the wizard was able to obtain information about the radiant isosceles triangle. There must be a clue somewhere.”
[……]
Niole pulled her knees up and, after thoughtful consideration, hastily wrote a sentence on the whiteboard as if something had come to her.
[The academy, no, the university, could it have information?]
“The university… Miskatonic? The place where Abraham is a professor?”
[Yes. I heard it’s a professional educational facility. There are many books. If it exists in the world, there should be records, and if so, then in the library of Miskatonic University…]
“That’s it! We must protect Abraham for the investigation, right? After all, he’s a professor! He might be able to take us to the university!”
Before Niole could finish writing the sentence, Tara interjected with excitement in her eyes. Bennett sighed, seeing the obvious intention behind her actions.
It was a turning point. Whether to continue exploring while leaving the anxiety factor of Tara’s emotions, or to point it out here. Was it something to be solved, or something to be tolerated?
Bennett weighed various factors. The insane professor’s intention of sending students to another world wearing the guise of a subject. Exploration with guaranteed safety. Favor towards the kind human Abraham, and the emerging outline of risks.
And the building annoyance.
Impulsively, Bennett reached a conclusion.
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“Or, let’s ask Abraham to find out. He knows a lot for sure…”
Bang!
Bennett slammed the table with his fist, cutting off Tara’s words. Then, in a lowered and harsh voice, he uttered,
“It seems like you’re misunderstanding the important part.”
“What…?”
“Our goal is not to protect Abraham. On the contrary, depending on the situation, it might be beneficial for Abraham to die. It could resolve the danger and gain us a foothold.”
“What? How can you say such a thing…! Kill Abraham?”
Crash.
As soon as Bennett brought up the extreme assumption, Tara shot up from her seat, glaring at him. In the commotion, the displaced chair teetered.
Bennett sharpened his gaze. He rose quietly, dragging the chair along, and faced Tara without evasion. He had to achieve his goal. So, he couldn’t just overlook child’s play that would diminish the success rate of his plan.
He raised his voice.
“Listen carefully. I didn’t say I would kill. I merely pointed out that, situationally, death might be advantageous. Understand that. Act without hesitation in crucial moments!”
“I can’t believe it! How well Abraham treated us!”
Veins bulged in his neck, flames flickering in his pupils.
“He’s from a different world. This isn’t where you belong! Wasn’t it to prevent the bloodshed at the academy that we formed a team?!”
“If he’s from a different world, does that mean it’s okay for him to die?! Do you think this place, this reality, is just an illusion or fake? Should I remind you that life is precious?”
Parallel lines like me. At the end.
“There are priorities in life⋯⋯!”
“Don’t try to take my family away from me⋯⋯!!”
[Stop!]
Crash!
Niore tossed the chair. It flew between Bennett and Tara, creating a noisy spectacle as it rolled on the floor. Only then did the two turn to Niore.
On the whiteboard she had set down, traces of sentences like “Don’t fight,” or “Why not talk calmly?” filled the erased spaces.
Niore took a deep breath, then sighed.
[Tara, I’ll take her, Bennett. Tara. We’ll talk again tomorrow.]
“⋯⋯Sure.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
The situation has come to an end. Niore led Tala up to the room, while Bennett held his throbbing head and tidied up the messy living room.
There was no need to raise their voices.
They could have spoken more softly, or perhaps it would have been better to overlook the situation.
Looking back, Bennett seemed angry. Honestly, he might have despised himself for not being able to share affection with someone in a position where it was possible. If that was the case, it couldn’t have been a trivial matter.
It was already too late to turn back.
Bennett banged his head against the wall and muttered. A bitter chuckle of self-pity escaped his lips, piercing his heart.
“…Who am I?”
Doing whatever it takes to retrieve his younger brother.
Creating chaos and fear in the academy, ultimately leading numerous students to their deaths.
A black magician.
—–
Isaac’s room. Now Niore and Tala’s room.
The arrangement of the furniture had slightly changed, and the appearance of the bedspread was different. The traces of Isaac were gradually being erased, and the space was beginning to be filled with the traces of the two of them.
Tala climbed onto the bed and crouched down. Small drops of suppressed emotions hung at the end of her thin eyelashes. The melancholic atmosphere continued.
Niore silently listened to the silence.
Tala murmured while looking at one side of the wall. It seemed like a soliloquy, but it also seemed like something she was saying to Niore.
“…Do I look strange to you too?”
[Yes. I think you look strange. Abraham is a good person, and I want to help too… but Tala, you already consider Abraham as family, don’t you?]
“……..”
[I think Bennett’s words were harsh. Sometimes he acts as if he has to give up everything to gain one thing. But still, Tala… the speed at which you attach affection, it worries me.]
Niore sent a gaze mixed with concern. As if her warm gaze could melt Tarra’s frozen lips, an untidy story began to trickle down drop by drop.
“⋯⋯I, I have no family. I had one, but they’re gone. We were really close⋯⋯.”
[I’m listening.]
“Mom and Dad, every morning when they woke up, whenever our eyes met. They looked at me with eyes full of happiness. Even in the reflection of my parents’ pupils, I had that expression. I still miss that gaze.”
[It seems like they were wonderful.]
“Sometimes, in Abraham’s eyes, the sunlight that I saw in my parents’ eyes is reflected. When I receive such a gaze, memories of the time spent with my family come back, and for a moment, I can be immersed in happiness⋯⋯.”
[What happened?]
In response to that question, Tara widened her eyes and began to retrace the past. The memories of resentment clung thickly to her heart like tar.
It happened one warm summer.
—–
#0: Tara’s Memories
Tara, a girl living in a small town working at a clothing store, had only one wish. To live happily with her family. She didn’t wish for a glamorous and wealthy life like a princess in a fairy tale, just an ordinary one like everyone else.
Waking up in the morning, straightening her back and preparing for the day, displaying the neatly arranged clothes, and seeing off her dad who went to meet wholesalers.
Guarding the clothing store, then, when the sun hangs on the clock tower, taking a walk with her mom and having a proper meal with her mom and dad as the sun sets.
She hoped for such a daily life to continue forever.
However, misfortune has a way of striking suddenly.
In the summer, when the warm sun bathes everything, it’s the perfect time for bugs and worms to thrive. Decay and pollution became lively under the watchful gaze of the warm sunlight.
Whether it was due to the negligence of the gravedigger who didn’t properly handle the bodies because of the difficulty in the summer heat, or the fault of the guards who refused to patrol even in the alleys, or the blame of the lord who didn’t bother to take care of the commoners for the sake of a piece of hard bread, or the cause of a beggar stabbing a neighbor for a single piece of bread.
The city was hit by a plague.
Many suffered, and Tara’s parents were not exempt. With blue spots covering their bodies, they succumbed to death day by day.
Tara, for some reason, remained untouched by the epidemic. She sold her wits in all directions to save her mom and dad. First, she went to the temple.
The temple was crowded. It was filled with tearful pleas for salvation. And in that crevice, there was Tara.
Those with money or power could get treatment, but the priests turned away those who did not. Tara was expelled.
Afterward, she sought out alchemists and sorcerers.
But the answers that came back were all negative. It was an unknown disease, it takes time, the plague won’t reach the underworld, and so on.
No matter how desperately she tried, there was no solution. Tara could only watch her parents’ deteriorating condition day by day. In the midst of this, a miracle happened.
Tara, the girl from the clothing store, was chosen as a saint candidate.
Hope emerged that she could save her family.
She went to the priests who came to her house and begged them. She would become a saint, devote her life to serving the goddess, and in return, grant her one wish – to save her family.
They replied as follows:
“If the saint candidate officially becomes a saint, her family should also be properly respected.”
She was delighted. The fact that she could save her family was simply delightful. Tara’s heart pounded as if it would burst. If she became a saint… she wouldn’t be able to live in the same house as before. Still, they could live healthily and occasionally meet with sincere gazes.
Tara did as she was told obediently. The lengthy ritual to become a saint began. She rode in a splendid carriage and headed to the Goddess Church headquarters. She cleansed herself as a saint for a week, and stuffed the contents of the scriptures into her mind.
She ate delicious food, managed her hair with fragrant oil, and the priestesses delicately filed and polished Tara’s nails. Anxious Tara wondered when she would become a saint. When she asked if these acts were necessary.
Due to long-standing tradition, the answer returned that they must be followed.
She became anxious. It had already been a month. Are her family members okay? The priests said they would take care of them, so it should be fine. Because.
The priests who had driven Tara, the clothing store girl, away, sincerely served Saint Tara. With blossoming smiles, they wished for the saint’s blessings.
Remembering their condescending gazes, Tara felt nauseous but, at the same time, gained assurance.
In the title of a saint, there was authority to overturn the attitudes of those stiff priests.
So, she thought.
There was no way it could be okay. She was a saint’s family, after all. Unless something bizarre happened, it was only natural for them to be extremely protective.
They must be doing well. Surely, that’s the case.
She muttered to herself. Tara’s complexion grew paler with each passing day, and the worry lines around her eyes deepened. But the priests, immersed in their religious fervor, simply rejoiced and exulted at the birth of the saint.
As the religious zeal within the sect intensified, Tara wilted away.
After the long and elaborate rituals concluded, Tara, adorned with golden petals, received the sacred tiara amid cheers from the crowd. She was officially recognized by the sect and became the saint.
It was a return to the gilded cage.
Having obtained wealth and honor almost unimaginable, Tara now had the duty to shower her family with love. To eat delicious food together, and being a saint’s family, to call the priests promptly if anyone fell ill. “Becoming a saint was thanks to my parents,” she said, expressing gratitude and honor…
Her desires and wishes were piled up like a mountain.
The Tara from the clothing store had returned to her family as Saint Tara.
Her family was suffering from a plague.
Saint Tara was disheartened.
The Tara who concluded the short story mumbled with a dry voice.
“The sect didn’t grant a single request. To save my family. It wasn’t about wishing for damn gold or glory, just that one thing…”
[……….]
“That plague could be cured with divine power. When the priests came to take me back to the headquarters, shouting that I must go with them to serve the goddess, if only they had recited the spell once, my family would have lived.”
Anger lingered in Tara’s pupils, but her tone remained flat. As if it was difficult for her to express anger. In a tired voice.
“Divine power is proof of being close to the goddess. They, at the moment of my birth as a saint, chose not to use divine power to fully enjoy the joy of the religious experience with the goddess. They thought someone else would do it in their place, thinking like that…”
Captivated by their own beliefs. For the sake of their religious ecstasy, they didn’t value anything else.
So, she still harbored resentment.
Resentment towards the priests who ignored Tara’s family due to their obsession with religion. And towards their actions.
The words that said, “Shouldn’t you be grateful for being born a commoner and experiencing a dramatic rise in social status?”
The words that said, “How can you reject the favor bestowed upon you by God with such human emotions?”
The words that said, “Since it’s already like this, shouldn’t you just live as things go? What’s passed will never return, so it’s inevitable.”
I resented them intensely. And that resentment spread like a wildfire, directed even towards myself.
Should I have not listened to what they said and instead run to my family? Why did I believe the words of the priests? How different would it have been if even just one person had cared? While I indulged in all sorts of luxuries for a month, how much pain must my mother and father have endured?
Her defiance of the church’s guidance was the maximum rebellion allowed by her conscience. And she herself knew the meaninglessness of it.
“I know too. Even if I do this, my mom and dad won’t come back…”
Tara struck the bed with her fists. Over and over again. And then, pouring out her longing for her family, she finally let out her innermost thoughts.
“But, but… Even if it’s just for a moment in another world, I can still remember the happy times then, right…?”
[……….]
Without a word, Niore patted Tara’s back. Tara snuggled into Niore’s embrace and cried.
For a moment, a faint pattern glimmered in Niore’s eyes and then disappeared.
That night, occasional sobbing sounds echoed, and it passed quietly.
—–
Bennett couldn’t fall asleep. Whether it was because of the occasional sobbing he heard while passing through the hallway or because of the anxiety growing in his heart. Then, suddenly, he thought of the night sky. He climbed up the stairs of the trapdoor and headed towards the rooftop.
Abram, who was counting the stars, turned around.
“Who is it? Ah, it’s you.”
[……….]
Bennett avoided the old man’s gaze.
Perhaps it was because of the lingering guilt in his heart. Even if there was no one to blame, even if there was a purpose to remind Tara of her goal.
The utterance that killing Abraham might be better, spoken out of Tarah’s mouth, lingered in the corner of Bennett’s chest, piercing his conscience. The old man had treated them kindly.
After stroking his beard a few times, the old man spoke quietly.
“Tara and Neo-re didn’t come out of the room. What happened?”
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“…They fought.”
“I won’t ask what it was about. However, it seems like you could use a change of mood too. Care to sit beside me?”
“…Yes.”
Bennett pulled over a round chair and sat next to Abraham. The cool breeze and the twinkling stars made the setting pleasant. However, the unusually stern sky was probably a matter of mindset.
Abraham spoke in silence as he looked through the telescope. Like casting a fishing rod into the sea, silence was an excellent bait to draw out conversation. In the quietness, Bennett suddenly asked,
“I saw the parcel.”
“Young ones who heed the advice of the old are rare. I understand. You already saw it, yet you ask… How was it?”
“Why do you continue your research? It didn’t seem like it would end with a threat. And you don’t need a source of income.”
“Curious about why this old man insists on research even risking his life, aren’t you?”
Abraham chuckled. He took his eyes off the telescope, turned towards Bennett, and sat facing him. He rubbed his wrinkled hands together, organizing his thoughts.
“I’m not stubborn because my days are numbered. I still want to live long. There are many things I haven’t done, and I haven’t reconciled with my daughter.”
“In that case, you should stop more than ever.”
“But, my boy, this research will undoubtedly benefit humanity. Even if the worst imaginable result comes out… At least it can give us time to prepare for the worst. If we’re lucky and get a few hundred million more years, it might provide clues to the profound mysteries of the universe.”
“…But humanity is threatening you, sending things like cat corpses.”
In Bennett’s eyes, the world was filled with malice.
Killing others to achieve one’s goals happened countless times, as numerous as the stars in the night sky. Bennett himself was one of those ominous stars.
In a harsh world, it was enough to live for oneself. Why bother with the needs of others? To that question, Abraham grinned, revealing his teeth.
“The humanity that is threatening Abraham. By sending things like cat corpses.”
“I know too. People are f*cking sh*tty. They’re like flies that lay eggs without caring whose corpse it is.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
Benedetto stiffened briefly at the fierce words that came out of Abraham’s mouth. The old man chuckled and continued speaking.
“After living this long, I must have met so many people. Most of them only care about what’s right in front of them and stab without hesitation. But if everyone does the same thing⋯⋯ wouldn’t there be more sad people in this world? It’s a realm of mathematical gain and loss. And⋯⋯.”
“⋯⋯⋯⋯.”
“Isn’t it impressive to contribute to the leap of mankind?”
“I-impressive… you say?”
“Yes. It’s something every scholar dreams of. Saving the world with the theory I’ve created. It’s been my dream since I was young.”
Benedetto looked at him, thinking it might be a joke, but Abraham’s eyes were honest and transparent. The old man’s eyes sparkled like a dreaming boy. It may have been childish, but⋯⋯.
Benedetto, somehow, felt like he knew.
Like every boy, Benedetto had also dreamed of being a hero when he was young. Carrying a sword, defeating villains, rescuing princesses.
Swept away by time, swept away by circumstances, the innocent moment of childhood that had been worn away, Benedetto could see it in the old man’s eyes.
It was about dreams.
His purpose hadn’t changed. He would do anything to save his younger sister, even if it meant hurting many people from the Academy. But⋯⋯.
If he were given one chance.
If the shining isosceles triangle, without harming others, showed him a path. Maybe. He might want to walk that path⋯⋯ Benedetto thought so. He felt a little weight lifted from his shoulders.
Benedetto had a conversation with Abraham with a slightly lighter heart. The old man willingly engaged in the young man’s conversation. They exchanged stories.
And so, the night grew late.
—–
Morning, the corridor. Benedetto ran into Tara. An uncomfortable silence flowed between them. Niore, from behind, wondered what he should throw if they fought again.
After a brief tension-filled moment, Bennett spoke first.
“I guess I was a bit extreme. My apologies, Tara.”
“…Did you eat something bad?”
Bennett took a deep breath and, after organizing his thoughts, blurted out,
“My stance hasn’t changed. If a situation arises where someone has to be sacrificed, I’d sacrifice Abraham rather than any of you. So…”
“……”
“Let’s make sure it doesn’t come to that. Can we agree on that much?”
“…Yeah, well, sure.”
Bennett extended his hand, and Tara took it. Neore applauded their momentous reconciliation. Now, she could finally relax, she thought.
The breakfast table that morning was filled with warmth. Bennett seemed more at ease, conversing effortlessly with Abraham. Tara also enjoyed the atmosphere. From a distance, their interactions looked like that of a family, harmonious and lively.
“Shouldn’t we start doing the dishes soon? Neore and I have been taking turns so far.”
“I only use two plates, while you use three. To make it fair…”
At that moment, the mansion’s door creaked open.
Creak. Creak. The sound of high heels. A woman, dressed in pure white with flowing silver hair, entered the house.
Whether it was because of her attire or the eyes that seemed to gaze into a distant place, a mysterious aura, as if traversing another world, enveloped her.
Abraham’s eyes widened, and his mouth hung open like never before.
“…Isaac.”
“The family has grown in your absence, Father.”
Abraham’s daughter, Isaac, had returned.