21 – Episode 21: Honest Feelings
＜1＞
Three days have passed since White Day.
It wasn’t until Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday that I was convinced.
Recently, the galaxy has been avoiding me.
That’s my final decision.
Is homemade chocolate overkill? Or are you shy?
In any case, it is clear that Eunha is currently avoiding me.
There is also evidence.
I tried to say hello to Eunha in the morning, but Eunha intentionally didn’t make eye contact with me.
He said that he decided to eat with Jung Ha-rim during lunchtime, and he disappeared somewhere.
Even yesterday’s Thursday night self-study went home, saying there were circumstances.
Was it very burdensome?
After all, was it a reasonable choice to give only ready-made products?
I felt sad because he suddenly avoided me.
Are you going to skip the night self-study today?
I think it would be really sad if I did that.
“What are you thinking?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Then straighten your face. Your face is scary right now.”
“How is my expression?”
“It’s like a hunter chasing a deer.”
“What is that?”
If I had to argue, Eunha would be a deer and I would be a hunter.
After a short conversation with Eugene, I looked towards the deer, or the galaxy.
But with a poof, Eunha’s gaze turned to the front.
It seems like he was staring at me… I guess it’s because of his mood.
Or do my eyes really look like hunters now?
“I can’t figure out why he’s doing that.”
“Why? Who? God Eunha?”
“You don’t look angry… but I don’t know.”
No, if he was angry in the first place, he wouldn’t have looked at me.
But if you’re not angry, why are you avoiding me?
Are you ashamed? So, does that mean that you have a change of heart about me?
The only other reason I can think of is that.
I have never been in a proper relationship, so I never conceited that I was approaching a girl properly.
So I was always careful… But even so, I look back at myself, wondering if I was too impatient.
But no matter how much I think about it, there doesn’t seem to be a reason to avoid it…
I’m dying of confusion.
“I’m going to the store, do you want to go too? Hungry.”
“It’s only been one period since lunchtime? Didn’t you eat lunch?”
“I ate. But today I didn’t eat much because I didn’t taste good. So you’re not going?”
“Let’s go. I need a glass of cider.”
“Is there something frustrating? Tell your brother openly.”
“What are you talking about? Let’s hurry. Oh, but is there zero cider at the canteen?”
“I think there was Coke Zero. There will be no zero cider.”
“Then I’ll just drink Coke.”
Yujin and I came out of the classroom and arrived at the canteen.
I bought Coke Zero and Eugene bought a piece of bread and went back to class.
“Hey, but you know Shin Eun-ha these days? Did you even fight?”
“You were unnecessarily quick-witted about such things. Didn’t fight But it does feel a bit distant.”
“Sure. It felt like we didn’t eat together these days and didn’t go to school together.”
“I want to ask you. Next week is a mock test, so I guess I’ll focus on my studies.”
“I suddenly feel very depressed. I heard that the mock test in March is the result of the CSAT… I’m worried.”
“Don’t worry too much about it. It’s up to you.”
“If anyone sees it, they’ll think they’ve taken the CSAT once.”
Ah- that’s right.
“I just said that. Let’s think positively.”
“Sometimes this bastard looks like an old kid.”
“Please call me an adult. That sounds good.”
“Old man.”
“This bastard?”
“Ah- that’s right. Hey, I’m going to go to class 8, so go first.”
“Yes. But there won’t be much time left until the bell rings, so come quickly.”
“Oki.”
I was sipping a Coke and about to enter the front door of the classroom.
I ran into Eunha as she was about to leave the classroom.
“Ah-ha, hello hangyul.”
“Um…”
I gazed at the galaxy.
With the eyes of a hunter aiming for a deer.
“Hey, I have to pass by, so can you step aside a bit…?”
It was frustrating.
Well, I know that Eunha has a stuffy side in the first place.
Thinking deeply alone can be considered prudent, but it also felt a bit stuffy.
Especially in human relationships like now.
“It’s a galaxy.”
“Huh?”
“Why are you avoiding me these days?”
I wanted to get rid of this stuffiness quickly.
To do that, I had to honestly talk with Eunha.
It was necessary to have a convincing reason, a conversation that I thought was a little persistent.
“Uh…?”
Eunha expressed a question, but I didn’t say anything.
I just looked straight at the galaxy and wanted a different answer.
However, Eunha didn’t say anything and just lowered her head.
And said in a very faint voice.
“It’s not like that…”
No matter how much information I know about galaxies, I don’t know everything.
All I know is the galaxy of the past.
It is unknown what the current galaxy is thinking.
In other words, if the galaxy doesn’t tell me properly, I don’t really know.
I know and understand that Eunha is poor at expressing herself.
However, if it continued like this, it would be difficult for me to have any relationship with Eunha.
“It’s not like that. Recently, he didn’t say hello to me in the morning, and when it was time for lunch, he went somewhere without a proper explanation. If you think about why you’re doing this, seeing that you’ve been doing that since I gave you chocolate… Was it too burdensome? Or did you hate it a little…?”
I want to know.
What does Eunha think?
Why are you avoiding me?
“That’s it, that’s why…”
“Then why are you doing this?”
“There is such a thing. That will pass!”
I could only watch the back of the galaxy running away from me.
It’s frustrating, but I don’t hate Eunha at all.
Because I knew from the start that Eunha was a frustrating person.
Above all, we only met eyes for a very short time, but I couldn’t help it because my heart was beating so fast.
＜2＞
I didn’t listen to the 6th period class at all.
Let’s summarize the situation objectively.
Galaxy avoids me for two reasons.
It was either because I was burdened with giving you homemade chocolate or because you had a change of heart toward me.
If you ask which of the two, I think the latter is more likely.
The basis for that is Eunha’s facial expression.
Anyone can see that Eunha’s red-hot expression is the most rational reason.
And even if it was burdensome, it is not like Eunha for Eunha to avoid me so blatantly.
If it was really burdensome, there is a high possibility that the galaxy would slowly come out and try to draw a line.
In other words, it is difficult to understand why you suddenly have a sense of distance from me in this way.
However, the former is not entirely without possibility.
What if Eunha was so burdened that she couldn’t even speak?
For now, the possibility is low, but what if?
Damn it. I began to understand the dull and inconsiderate male protagonists a little.
It’s natural to go to hell if you think wrong, so I had no choice but to think of the number of cases.
Rushing recklessly is not appropriate in the current situation.
The risk of not doing so is too great.
Originally, the most dangerous thing for a guy in his teens or 20s is to mistakenly think that that girl likes me.
It’s not once or twice that I’ve seen a case where I was mistaken and rushed recklessly and ended up in a mess.
In conclusion, it is said that now is the turning point that determines the relationship between me and the galaxy.
Since I pulled it last time, shall I push it this time?
No. If you do that and get pushed out all the time, it’s a total waste.
On top of that, I don’t understand a little about pushing away someone you like.
But I’m worried that continuing to pull will make the current situation worse.
I don’t know. Just be me
There is no way to come up with a proper answer even if you think about it.
Originally, Eunha is a little frustrating, so I should ask her directly.
“Hangyeol. I go first. Have a good weekend.”
“Yes. Bye. Have a good weekend.”
Yujin hurriedly packed her bag and left the classroom.
The classmates slipped away one by one, and in the end, only me and Eunha remained in the classroom.
I strode to the seat of the galaxy.
Just in time, Jung Ha-rim wasn’t there, so I sat next to Eun-ha.
“Hey, Eunha.”
“Huh?! Why Hanil?”
“Aren’t you avoiding me because it’s really burdensome or because you don’t like it?”
“Ugh…! Then! Of course···!”
“If it’s burdensome or you don’t like it, can you tell me without struggling?”
“Uh…?”
I told Eunha exactly what I was worrying about.
“Since Eunha is a woman and I am a man, I know there is a part where we have to be careful with each other. But if I ever did something embarrassing to Eunha, I would like her to tell me honestly. I mean, I want to hear Eunha’s honest thoughts. I don’t like to guess alone. That’s why I want you to honestly tell me about Eunha’s feelings. I felt that the galaxy eluded me from Wednesday to Friday. It was frustrating because I didn’t know the reason, and I felt sad because it suddenly happened. These are my thoughts and these are my feelings.”
From noble mt dot com
As I spoke calmly, the galaxy stared at me.
“Uh…? No…I just…”
“Um- sorry for saying this all of a sudden.”
It seemed that Eunha hadn’t properly sorted out her feelings yet.
Even if I rushed to answer now, it was clear that it would not be Eunha’s real answer.
“You don’t have to answer now. Think about it carefully and let me know later when you get a chance. Then I’ll leave. Have a good weekend.”
“Ah- yes… Even if you go carefully…”
There is probably no better answer than this at this point.