Regression Is Too Much chapter 117

117 – The Returner’s Efforts (12)

A week passes.

“You said your hobby is visiting delicious restaurants? They say the cold noodles here are so delicious. “Are you interested?”

A week passes.

“I heard there’s an aquarium and a cafe here? Let’s give it a try. Hey, why is the price like this?”

A week passes.

Restaurant. Cafe. Cinema. Park. PC room. Amusement park. Traditional village. Botanical garden. Lake. Gyeongbokgung.

The time we spend together accumulates. The memories we share with each other accumulate. A subtle tension builds up.

It was such a fun and enjoyable time that I forgot all the hardships I had endured in Goseong, covered in snow.

This is a fact I realize again, but I feel like I was extremely lonely. People who show the same reaction every time they return. People who move as I designed. People who obediently follow what I say if I use their characteristics.

“Can’t I just take a bite of that? No? Are you still going to eat it?”

Human relationships are not like that. Human relationships are when different people come together and create various chemical reactions. I realize that fact.

“Ah, today was really fun.”

“It would have been perfect if you hadn’t destroyed the puzzle at the escape room cafe.”

“What? Kim Jun-ho, do you want to die?”

Choi Ji-won and I were already friends. As we have been intertwined and confused over the past few months, it has become like that.

“… “

The moment I realized that, I felt that the time had come.

Time passes helplessly.

**

Dark streets at night. The only source of light is the occasionally turned on street lights.

“… “

“… “

Choi Ji-won and I walk down the street in silence. Someone says that people who are comfortable with silence can be called friends. But the silence that is flowing right now is infinitely uncomfortable.

“Jiwon.”

“Huh?”

For the first time, I call her by her name. It was awkward, but it felt like something I had to do.

What I am going to say from now on will remain in my memory forever.

After clearing my throat and adjusting my clothes, I spit out the sentence I had practiced dozens and hundreds of times in my mind.

“I’m going to go back now.”

“… “

Choi Ji-won is silent. However, rather than being shocked, her expression seems more like what was coming was coming.

“If you look at the news these days, there’s only talk about players all day. Who committed a crime, who is great, who is how strong… “I heard that in Japan, some crazy guy massacred dozens of other players.”

“… “

“Look at us now. I only broke the 4th floor, but I already have better physical abilities than an Olympic gold medalist. This is what it is now, 10 floors to go. 20Th floor. 50Th floor. If we move forward like this, how strong will it become? How unstable will this society become? If we don’t destroy the tower as quickly as possible, the Earth may be destroyed by the players.”

He stops Choi Ji-won, who does not respond, and mechanically recites the words she had prepared. Those were words to Choi Ji-won, but they were also words to me.

“So, for everyone… I have to go back. “Because the Earth could be destroyed just for me to have fun.”

I don’t want to go back. But we must return. For everyone.

Jeobbuk.

Choi Ji-won’s steps stop. Accordingly, my steps also stopped.

The two of us standing under the streetlight. Everyone just looks at the floor.

“Aren’t you angry at me?”

Choi Ji-won asks carefully.

“You said it with your own mouth. Every time I go back, it’s so sad that I become distant from the people I was close to, and I don’t want to be close to them anymore. I will keep my distance as much as possible. But you became close to me because of my insistence.”

“… That’s right.”

The moment she said, ‘See you next week,’ I already knew that this future would come. I knew it would be wise to go straight back.

“Well, me too… “It must have been difficult.”

Just as you seek out cigarettes even though you know that they are bad for your health, I think my judgment was clouded by loneliness. I see that you have chosen a future that can only lead to destruction in the long run.

From Noble mtl dot com

Choi Ji-won bursts into laughter while looking at me scratching the back of my head.

“Junho, Kim Junho. “Do you know what your expression looked like when I saw you at the cafe?”

“How was it?”

“He just blanked out. “Like an empty person.”

“… “

“I’ve been thinking about it, and I think you’re really unique.”

Choi Ji-won walks around me and talks.

“When we play together, he just seems like a boy his age. “If I had a normal male friend, I wonder if I would feel exactly like this.”

“… “That’s right, I’m a boy your age.”

“But if you look at his behavior, that’s not true.”

Choi Ji-won, who was circling around me, stops behind me.

“You want to save everyone? Are you repeating the regression because you think it would be unfair if someone died because of you? If it were a normal person, I would have just given up a long time ago. “Or compromise accordingly.”

“… “If you hadn’t given me the ability to return, I would have given up.”

But no. I have been given the means to achieve the best results, and giving up these abilities is essentially dereliction of duty.

“Junho. “That way of thinking is unique.”

I couldn’t see Choi Ji-won, but I somehow got the feeling that she was smiling.

“They say they are small citizens and all, but in reality, their behavior patterns are similar… Responsibility is the best in the world. It’s not like someone threatened me by saying, ‘If it’s not you, the Earth will be destroyed!'”

“You could actually perish because of me, right?”

“Most people don’t think that way. “I don’t know if it’s just me.”

Choi Ji-won’s tone suddenly changes as he says, “I think that kind of appearance is cool.”

“But what if the person you are is worn out in the process?”

“… “

“Just like when I saw you at the cafe, even if I climb all the way up the tower with those empty eyes and clear it… “What about you?”

“We are as alert as possible to such situations.”

“Did it work?”

“… No.”

Didn’t you feel it keenly on the 3rd and 4th floors? The phenomenon of people not being seen as people.

“But… But what should I do? “If I don’t do it, the Earth could be destroyed.”

Actually, it still doesn’t feel real. The Earth is suddenly going to be destroyed? When? How? Nothing is set in stone.

But since I realized that this was probably the tower’s goal, I couldn’t stop.

You may stray onto a different path along the way. You could be wasting as much time as you want. However, just before going up to the next floor, you must do your best to achieve the best results. That’s the correct answer I think.

“… “

Choi Ji-won’s slightly rough hand, which was silent, grabs my soft hand from behind.

“Do you know what my ideal type is?”

“… What.”

“He is someone I can respect. “Like my father.”

“… “

“You’re kind of cool.”

Choi Ji-won’s trembling voice.

When she heard that voice, her breathing gradually became heavier. It feels like the blood is draining from her head.

“At first it was out of genuine curiosity. But not anymore.”

“Don’t do it.”

“I know this memory may be painful for you. “You might end up calling me a b*tch forever.”

“No…” “

“But rather than you being reduced to a machine without any emotions, I think this is right for Kim Jun-ho to remain Kim Jun-ho. Just like you think of Choi Ji-won in the tutorial whenever you’re having a hard time, I hope you think of me today.”

She shakes off Choi Ji-won’s tightly held hand and forces her body to turn.

“You are a really cool person. So keep doing that. I will support you.”

Quiet street. Choi Ji-won, who I finally saw under the streetlight, was crying.

She forced herself to smile, tears streaming down her face.

We both know what is right. I just couldn’t accept it in my heart.

“You… If this happens… “

“… “

“If you’re like this, how can I go back…” “

I have been alone all this time. There were a lot of people I was involved with, but I wasn’t friends in the true sense of the word.

This is a friend I have regained after such a long time. No, I already thought of Choi Ji-won as more than that.

“I should have treated you harshly…” “

Did you at least swear so that I could lose my temper, spit and move on? How should I accept a breakup like this?

“I don’t want to break up…” “

Hugs her tightly to her. Even though we didn’t put it into words, we already had something in common.

We recognized each other’s skills to some extent. They recognized each other’s qualities. We recognized each other as colleagues who will advance to the top.

At the same time, I confirmed that we fit very well as friends.

It’s fun to be together. But we can’t be together.

Even if I go back and meet Choi Ji-won again, it will not be the current Choi Ji-won. Just as the Choi Ji-won in front of me right now is not the Choi Ji-won in the tutorial, the new Choi Ji-won will also not be the Choi Ji-won in front of me right now.

The warmth and joy I have felt so far becomes a dagger and pierces my heart. At the time I was contemplating whether to just get rid of everything and go up to the 5th floor.

Jaw.

A firm hand holding both my cheeks.

“Listen carefully. I won’t tell you twice.”

Choi Ji-won, who has stopped crying, looks straight into my eyes.

“I’m not sure if I love you yet. I like you.”

Choi Ji-won kissed me unexpectedly. The tingling sensation of the tip of the tongue being drawn out.

The moment when I felt the ecstatic touch, the smell of Choi Ji-won’s flesh, and the spicy taste of blood.

[You have suffered damage.]

[Return to the moment you first entered the 4th floor.]

***

“… Ah.”

It was on the 4th floor.