189 – Natural
Roel is loved by everyone. Roel, who always makes a good first impression and is easily liked, is close to a munchkin not only in power but also in relationships. She has an innately good-looking appearance and even a personality that makes anyone comfortable. Her very existence as Roel is like a being born to be loved by her.
With such a setting, my shady desire, which had never been easily liked by someone without effort, was revealed in writing. I was shy enough to think that the ability to easily get along with people is an innate talent, and I couldn’t get along with anyone easily without effort.
Imagination can be a good weapon for the job of a writer who embellishes lies, but when it comes to human relationships, it has the disadvantage of causing mental fatigue by creating countless troubles, assumptions, and hypotheses. Like a frog dying on an inadvertently thrown stone, he had a bad habit of attaching meaning to his words and extending his worries. It made the relationship worst, and I was isolated in my self-created depression.
So I projected my ideal onto Roel. She is the main character who is easily liked by others, is loved as if for granted, and is admired by those around her. Although clichéd, he was also a utilitarian warrior who sacrificed himself for others.
In contrast to my life full of lies, Roel always wanted me to be true and honest. Unlike me, who was writing out of half-baked jealousy and trying to make money by forcibly expanding the story, Roel even had a sincere goal of becoming a hero for everyone.
I was able to understand Roel better because he was the opposite of me. Anyone can observe a mirror image.
So I was very unfamiliar with Roel, who acted in a close situation in the game. Regardless of the difference in his skills, Roel always took seriously in sparring and battles. Rather than grandiose words like sportsmanship, it was closer to the courtesy of Roel’s opponent. It was not an official setting, but he maintained that attitude until the end of the novel.
I didn’t think it was appropriate for Roel to be hypocritical or pretending to others. Hypocrisy and pretense are clothes that suit me, but not clothes for Roel.
Then, what was the reason Roel acted strangely? Even thinking about it for a bit, I was able to recall that there are several obvious differences between the original world and the present world.
The biggest one is that Roel, unlike the original, has entered the realm of the transcendent. Originally, it was a story of a thrilling come-from-behind victory with Roel’s overwhelming force at the end of Transcendence Academy being helplessly defeated by the Academy Alliance’s pincer attack.
But becoming a Transcendentalist may have changed Roel’s mind. However, I thought that even if I had more time than usual, the Roel I know wouldn’t do the act of deliberately creating a risky situation to elicit the audience’s response. Because it was a ‘deceit’ that Roel detested and distanced himself from.
Then maybe my presence, one of the other obvious differences, was at issue. It means that Roel’s behavior changed when Ross, who should have exited in death, participated in the triathlon… It also made me scratch my head. The basic question, whether Roel really needed to do that, remains unresolved.
Doubts and insecurities swirl in my head. At the unanswered question, I took a deep breath.
After the games on the second day of the triathlon, everyone headed to the restaurant. There was a conversation about tomorrow’s team match, but I couldn’t concentrate on the conversation and quietly observed Roel.
Through the relay magic, the unfamiliar figure of Roel disappeared, and as always, he returned to Roel, who was sloppy enough to feel annoyance. With Ellie on either side of me, she continued talking nonstop, like a person whose throat explodes when the conversation is interrupted.
The subject of conversation went from talking about last year’s triathlon to explaining about a newly opened cafe in the capital. Everyone around me was happy and focused on Roel’s story, but I forced a smile and tried to figure out the difference in Roel in my head.
… However, that effort returned to failure. The current Roel was the Roel I knew. Even in the middle of the conversation, I thought that maybe I was mistaken for something in the way he quietly drove delicious food in front of me. Right now, Roel would be happy if I opened my mouth, and would even feed me a meal.
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Nothing has changed in Roel’s treatment of me. If so, I thought that the reason for Roel’s acting might be an external problem that had nothing to do with me.
For everyone to reach a happy ending, the main character, Roel, was the most important. Because he was the hero who would defeat the demon king. Before the sudden variable appeared in a huge size, we had to prepare for the shock to come.
After roughly finishing my meal, I struggled to shake off Roel who was trying to grab me and came out of the restaurant.
I quickly toured the academy where the festival was in full swing, in order to meet the person who would be most sensitive to Roel’s changes. After wandering around for a long time with a tired body, I finally found Rosalyn drinking honey beer in a corner store.
He is the stalker who knows Roel the most in this world along with me. When it comes to Roel, it’s Rosalyn who writes down every detail. Indeed, if Roel had changed something, she would be the first to notice.
Rosalind, sipping her beer with her breasts larger than her head resting on the table, her face flushed a little, perhaps because she was drunk.
“Senior Rosalyn.”
As I approached, calling her name, I met eyes with the person sitting across from Rosalyn. It is Estelle with blush on her face. It seems that the setting that she is Rosalyn’s friend is still the same.
“Ugh… ? Ross, long time no see!”
She said hello to Rosalan, who, as if being drunk and flirting, took her empty chair. When she made eye contact with me, ignoring Estelle, who lowered her head, she asked Rosalyn directly.
“Did something happen to her brother while on vacation?”
At my question, Rosalyn bit her lip as if in agony and looked up at her ceiling. Rosalyn, who had been blank for a while, slowly lowered her gaze and replied.
“Not really… ?”
At the same time, Rosalyn’s breasts, which were placed on her table because of her drooping shoulders, sway and draw her attention. Looking away with difficulty, I asked again.
“… So, don’t you think her older brother has changed lately? Maybe it’s my personality, I suddenly have a different hobby….”
Rosalind pursed her lips at my question. Rosalyn said as if she were assertive.
“There is no such thing. Roel, my love, never changes! That’s why it’s better… ! Be nice to everyone, be kind to people like me….”
Suddenly Rosalyn slurred her words, and she stared at me with her eyes slightly focused.
“… Roel doesn’t sleep much these days.”
As she was thinking, should the reduced sleep be considered a change, she added, frowning, as if Rosalyn had a hard time explaining it.
“Because I cut down on sleeping time and date time and increased training time… That’s why Flavia has been more mean these days… Bad year. Anyway, maybe that’s a change… Being more sincere….”
Looking at Rosalyn as she gulped down her honey beer, I thought for a moment.
Definitely strange. As usual, Roel in the second semester of his second year focused on his relationship with the heroine rather than training. It was a time when I was focusing on s*x with Rosalyn and Flavia during my training time.
Roel focuses on training… ? He became a Transcendentalist faster than expected, but he is not satisfied with his status. I felt a strange strange feeling there.
Roel had no reason to be strong now. The church was concentrating on the saintess, and the emperor and church were still far from appearing. There is no threat to Roel’s safety. There is a strong enemy that even the current Roel can’t overcome, but its existence has not yet been revealed.
However, Roel is constantly working hard to become stronger. Why? As I was organizing his thoughts, Rosalyn suddenly grabbed my hand. Her body trembled involuntarily at the soft, warm touch.
Rosalyn, who was looking at me with a hazy stare from her drunkenness, mumbled.
“Ross… please. Be kind to Roel. Roel always feels guilty about you.”
Tightening her grip, Rosalyn exhaled excitedly in my face, smelling of sweet honey beer.
“Roel is your family.”
Rosalyn put her head on the table as she finished with those words. I let go of the hand I was holding and exhaled.
“… Family.”
That it’s the only thread connecting the two of us who don’t match… I was strangely resentful.