59 – Because this world does not love you (4)
“You decided to become friends with the crown prince?”
After explaining what happened with Claes, Yuna was more shocked than necessary and slammed her desk. I quickly grabbed the falling pencils and stuck my head out onto the desk.
“In reality, he’s more of a subordinate than a friend, but in name he’s okay.”
“No, anyway…Is that really true? Why on earth?”
“We had a very honest conversation. We even agreed to help out a little with work.”
“So you decided to become friends?”
“Not really, but I decided to mention it when I proposed this time, and if everything goes well, I’ll invite you to the wedding too. Isn’t that enough?”
“A man of his caliber would not lie, but…Did you suggest that first? Really?”
“Yes. I did well.”
“Ha…”
Yuna cupped her face in response to my immature reaction. She then spread her fingers out and looked at me.
“How on earth did you think of doing that? Even though you knew that you were hated by the crown prince of the empire?”
“They say a crisis is an opportunity.”
“…You really seem like a child with no fear. You attack the duke’s daughter without hesitation. You even tease the crown prince. But you’re very afraid of blindfolding yourself unnecessarily. You know that you’re strange, right?”
“hahahaha…”
I answered with laughter. But Yuna seemed so angry that she had no intention of letting me go.
“Really, you…”
“Hey Ellen! Come by for a second.”
Just as another storm of nagging was about to pour in, I heard Claes’ voice coming from the hallway. I jumped up from my seat as if I had been saved by that voice. Naturally, Yuna’s anxious gaze moved up to the tip of her chin.
“I’ll go, Yuna. She gets really annoyed if I don’t go quickly.”
“Ellen.”
“Huh?”
“If you’re doing this because of the previous engagement…”
“Yes. That’s why I’m doing this.”
As always, the honest answer left the other person speechless. Yuna looked at me with strange eyes and finally threw out one word.
“…Then, at best, this time, just do as the crown prince tells you. Don’t do anything weirder.”
“Don’t worry. Nothing else comes to mind.”
I winked lightly, then quickly left my seat and headed towards the hallway bathed in fresh sunlight. When I was dazzled by the bright sunlight and raised my hand, Claes frowned and scolded me.
“I don’t have time to say hello or anything, so come quickly. Don’t delay.”
“I didn’t say hello, but I covered my eyes with my hand because you were so dazzling.”
“Speaking of nonsense. Did you seduce women with nonsense like that? Let’s talk while we walk. We don’t have time.”
He ran down the hallway at a fast pace, as if he was in such a hurry, and I followed behind him like a faithful follower. Claes spoke quickly without even checking if I was following him.
“Okay. The date and time is three days later, on the eve of the Academy Festival.”
“The eve of the festival? The festival is over two weeks away. But are you holding the eve now?”
“…I just advanced it. Is that okay? Don’t complain about small details.”
“Ah, yes. I understand.”
I nodded, slightly amazed at the omnipotent power. Claes continued his conversation as if nothing was wrong with me.
“That night, the president will come out and say something, and then explode fireworks. Then, there will be an event where students will come out on stage and say what they want to say to their friends or lovers, and the name is the sound of the heart. . Something like that. I made this too. Do you understand up to this point?”
“Yes.”
“At that event, a few of the guys I prepared will talk about trivial things. As the atmosphere gradually relaxes, I will come out and start talking. I’ll probably talk about you there as well, and then at some point, we’ll move on to talking about Elise. “What do you think? Do you think it’s okay?”
“Hmm… It feels a bit childish…”
I was trying to answer honestly, but I trailed off when I saw Claes’ face shriveled up like rotten fruit. And then he urgently added a word.
“…Still, it doesn’t seem that bad. But I think the atmosphere before that is more important than that.”
“The atmosphere before that?”
“If you treat her as usual and then suddenly confess, wouldn’t Elise be embarrassed? That’s why we need to create an atmosphere in which she can confess before then.”
“But the event has meaning if it has to happen suddenly. Isn’t that a surprise gift?”
“That’s right, but it’s not good to be too sudden. You should at least make the other person anticipate that a special moment may come today. In fact, it’s okay to give the hint a few days in advance rather than on the day.”
“As expected, you are skilled. How on earth do you know such things?”
“I heard it all too. A long time ago.”
Naturally, my memories wandered into the past. However, there was a risk of falling into a soggy nightmare if I made a mistake, so I forced myself to pull up my collar. Meanwhile, Claes was muttering to himself again.
“…Well, it’s not that bad anyway. Okay, we can proceed like that. Okay, so now you just need to help me with one more thing.”
“One thing? What is it?”
“It’s a script for when you confess.”
“What?”
I was so embarrassed that I couldn’t control my facial expression. My lips were trembling, and I finally opened my mouth to find something to say.
“Wouldn’t it be better if you made it yourself? Still, there are feelings between two people.”
“But I’ve never done anything like that before.”
“You just have to speak your honest feelings. It won’t be that difficult.”
“What do you mean by such an honest heart?”
“That’s just the words that come out when you face Elise…”
“Eye. You talk a lot, Ellen. Just do it if you have to. Don’t complain.”
In the end, Claes couldn’t hold back and lost his temper. Then, when the attention of the people in the hallway turned, he cleared his throat and spoke softly.
“Well, then, wouldn’t it be okay if you presented me with a model answer or something? Let me look at it and refer to it. That would be okay, right?”
“Well…If that’s the case…”
“Okay, then I’ve decided to help. Let’s start right now. The problem now is the damn atmosphere…”
Claes fell into his own thoughts again. I could already feel something creaking, but it seemed like it was my job to fix it somehow. From the prince’s shadow falling beneath his feet, he could feel the path of sharp thorns.
“Ah, yes. That will do.”
In the meantime, he snapped his fingers as if something had flashed again. It was clear that it wouldn’t be a good idea, but he decided to ask anyway.
“Well, did you come up with a good idea?”
“Yes. It’s about creating that atmosphere. You should also come on stage and confess to Yuna. How do you think?”
“What…What?”
“Wouldn’t that create an atmosphere? And I’m sure you’ve never done anything in front of people either. What do you think? It’s not that bad, right?”
“Uh…That’s…”
“Really. Are you taking it out now? That’s not manly.”
For the first time, Claes smiled and put his arm around my shoulder. If it weren’t for this situation, he would have been happy to have become friends with the crown prince, but he couldn’t raise his eyebrows. It’s not that difficult to confess to Yuna now, but…
…I don’t want to do it while being a bridesmaid like that.
“Well, this is also from Yuna’s perspective. Think about it slowly. But just know that I want you to do it.”
“I…”
“I told you to at least think about it first, okay Ellen? Think about it carefully for the remaining time.”
A clear sense of pressure was felt from the arm wrapped around her shoulder. I just smiled, not even thinking about shaking off the crushing weight.
“Okay. I’ll think about it.”
“Okay. Just think about it. You have a lot of time anyway.”
“…”
His last words fell heavily in my heart. I nodded at him even though I knew that wasn’t true. And then he answered brightly.
“Is that so?”
But unfortunately, three days was not as long as I thought. The hour hand went by smoothly, whether it knew my heart or not, and in the blink of an eye, the day of the event arrived. And until that day, Claes still had the same attitude as before.
“You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, Eren. There’s also Yuna’s position.”
“I understand, Claes.”
“But I hope you give me courage.”
From Noble mtl dot com
“I’ll try my best.”
“Once again, you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, but…”
“Okay, relax, Claes. You’re so annoying.”
“Nervous? Me?”
I tried my best to deny it, but I couldn’t hide the evidence that appeared on my body. I comforted Claes’ trembling shoulders and he looked at the script I had written once again.
“Phew…Yeah. I guess you’re nervous. But there’s still a lot of time left, right?”
“Not even thirty minutes left, Claes. We have to get out soon.”
“What? Already? Damn. It’s faster than I thought.”
“Originally, you should have been with Elise now. You two spent enough time together before you met me, right?”
“Don’t worry about that. I took care of it.”
“Okay. Then I’ll go now. I can’t stay with you any longer. Unless you’re going to confess to me.”
“Don’t tell terrible jokes. They won’t help at all.”
He still seemed nervous. But now I really had to go. I lifted my butt off the chair in the VIP room that I had become accustomed to and walked towards the door.
“Then I’ll go, Claes. Cheer up.”
“Yeah. I never thought I’d say this, but…Thank you. It was helpful in a way.”
Claes’ tone of voice was filled with arrogance to the end. Just as I was about to leave him behind, a word followed.
“And think about the offer carefully, okay?”
“…I’m really going. Cheer up, Claes.”
I walked out without giving a clear answer on purpose. Before I knew it, the darkness had deepened and I was hugging the back of my neck with two cool arms. I sighed quietly as the chill creeped up like a vine.
“Ha…”
As Yuna said. Did I do something for nothing?
No matter how much it was to raise my status, I worked really hard for three days. In addition to writing the script, Claes harassed me with all kinds of trivial problems and poured out his negative emotions without filtering. It’s like dealing with an emotional trash can.
Well, that was something I expected, so it didn’t feel like a big burden. But when he suggested using my and Yuna’s emotions to make his moment stand out, I thought it would be hard to bear.
He said I was just an extra in his life, but I didn’t want to bring out my feelings in order to help him. If you do that, the feelings you cherish will end up being tainted in the eyes of others.
I also had a chastity that I wanted to protect.
“Huh…”
Nevertheless, the words Claes emphasized kept ringing in my ears. I deliberately shook off those memories and walked towards the playground. Now it was time for me to go look for Yuna.
But I didn’t have to spend that much time looking for Yuna. As soon as I walked out the front door, someone leaning against the wall blew their breath in my direction. Only then did I approach him with a sincere smile.
“Yuna.”
“Why are you so late, Ellen?”
Rather than a warm greeting, a nagging voice came out first. It felt like I was getting scolded by Yuna more often these days. I held her hand preciously. Warmth flowed through her veins and throughout her body.
“Our crown prince is more timid than I thought. Has he already started?”
“No, that’s not it. But everyone, including Elise, is gathered there. Anyway, what eve is it? There are more than two weeks left until the festival.”
“I only followed Claes because he said so. But don’t go too far. There will be fireworks and there will be a good atmosphere.”
“…You probably didn’t plan anything else strange, right?”
Yuna, observing her expression, sharply dug into her lungs. I tried to avoid her gaze and grabbed her hand.
“You’ll find out when you get there. Now, let’s go quickly. Before it’s too late.”
“Okay. Let’s go first. Anyway, I’m looking forward to the fireworks.”
It was only then that the first positive answer came out. I was relieved by that fact and began to move briskly.
When I arrived at the playground, I saw a decorated podium and students gathered together in front of it. Like Yuna, they also seemed embarrassed by the eve coming so quickly, but they seemed to be enjoying the event again. Anyway, the night sky is full of stars, and there is a campfire sparking in the land where the heat of the day has cooled. Young men and women in their prime could not help but feel excitement.
That was the same for me too, so I felt my heart agitated for some reason. Or am I just nervous? Unable to understand my own feelings, I deliberately turned my head to Yuna.
“Still, she’s pretty. Isn’t she?”
“Yes. The stars are pretty.”
Yuna answered in a dreamy voice, as if it was her first time seeing the starry night sky. Perhaps she too lived in a world where stars did not rise? I blended into the crowd of extras gathered together with Yuna, who had endless stars in her eyes.
“Hmm… Hmm. Hmm.”
As I approached the podium, the president came up and cleared his throat, clearing his throat. It seemed he was about to start whatever he had planned for tonight.
Probably, the president also prepared a script for today. Since it was a hastily organized event, they probably thought about it all night. They must have taken great pains to tell a story that was reasonably witty and authoritative so that the students would not get bored or lose their sense of weight.
But unfortunately, no one will focus on his story today. That’s the same for me too. As always, the students will just pass by his story and then be distracted by the splendor of the fireworks that will explode afterwards. When the atmosphere starts to heat up like that, some extras will come out and say nice things. Then, the main character will finally come out and take the decisive moment.
I finally turned my head and looked for Claes with my eyes. As the president’s voice lingered in the air as he finally began to speak, my eyes wandered in search of the crown prince and Elyse. Soon, they could be seen approaching from the other side of the sky, where the horizon stretched out.
The crown prince in a fancy uniform approaching students wearing ordinary school uniforms. From that alone, it seemed clear who the star of the night would be. As he and Elise blended into the crowd, the rest of the students quickly turned into extras. As a bridesmaid, just to lift up one person.
And I was no exception.
“…”
Until that moment, I was still worried. Claes said that if you don’t like it, don’t do it, but you can’t just accept that. He wouldn’t say that he wouldn’t keep his promise just because he didn’t, but it seemed clear that there would be some disadvantage.
But does that mean I have to waste my emotions like that?
Should I take out what pure heart I have left for him?
Perhaps it may be the last innocence for me.
Just. Should I spend my money as an extra for the main character?
…I don’t know.
“Ellen. Look over there.”
“Huh?”
At that time, Yuna raised her finger and pointed to the sky. Suddenly, there was a hint of excitement in her voice. I slowly raised my head as my heart pounded.
And at that moment, dazzlingly beautiful fireworks filled the night sky.
Boom!!
“…!”
Cheers and applause erupted along with the sound of firecrackers. People were happy, laughing, talking, and sharing their emotions with each other. It was the same for Yuna. She grabbed my sleeve and pointed excitedly at the sky.
“Wow… Ellen. Look at that. It’s really pretty.”
“Yes. I’m watching.”
Her pretty eyes were full of starlight and the remains of firecrackers. Like an innocent child popping soap bubbles, Yuna looked more pure than ever as she looked at the sparkle powder that continued to scatter. It seemed like I was the only one thinking about something strange at this moment.
Pyuuu…
“Ellen! Look over there. It’s going to explode again!”
“I know. So stop pulling.”
As another flame rose along with the sound of air being released from the balloon, Yuna pulled my arm again. This time, a thin smile appeared on her lips as well. But the moment the fireworks exploded, that smile disappeared without a trace.
Boom!
“…”
I scratched the back of her neck for no reason and bit my lip. If I just follow the Crown Prince’s instructions, he might truly recognize me as a friend. If that happens, the Duchess might not be against Yuna and I getting engaged. If I gave up my pride for a moment, I could have taken the future into my own hands.
A future that will not scatter in vain like the fireworks in the sky.
…
Pyuuu…
Boom!!!
“…!”
I unconsciously flinched at the sound of firecrackers exploding. For some reason, it felt like the sound was louder than before. Without realizing it, I touched my waist with one hand. Of course there was nothing there.
“…Ellen.”
“Huh?”
“Could you please stop touching my back in a place like this? It tickles.”
“Oh, sorry.”
When I looked back, I saw that my bad hand was tightly grasping Yuna’s waist. I scratched the back of her neck again and laughed helplessly. Then, I gathered back the worries that had scattered in my mind and focused my consciousness.
…So what should we do? Should I just bear with it this time? Maybe I should do that. Rather than just pretending, it would be better to create an opportunity to become really close friends. I am…
Piyuuu…
Boom!!!
“aaah!!!”
“…!!!”
At that moment, a scream was heard from somewhere. I grabbed Yuna’s waist again and hastily turned her head. However, where my eyes landed, there was not a bleeding man, but a male student grunting while clutching his forearm.
“Oh, it hurts! I told you not to hit me!”
“You saw another woman just now, right? How many times have I told you not to look away!”
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Argh!”
The male student who was hit on the back again let out a painful scream, and the people around him burst into laughter. Yuna also smiled thinly. But I couldn’t laugh. My body was still stiff from tension, and now even my heart began to pound.
And in the meantime, another firework exploded.
Piyuuu…
Boom!!!
“Ha…”
I suddenly let out a deep sigh. My hand kept going to my waist, and my eyes scanned the surroundings at will. Beyond the invisible platform. The window of the classroom building with lights twinkling for a moment. And behind a large rock where people’s shadows were gathered.
It felt like someone would jump out at any moment from places out of my sight and scatter fireworks in the sky.
“Ellen…?”
“…”
I kept holding on to Yuna’s waist and kept repeating to myself. Don’t be stupid. Those are just students. I’m now thinking about the stupid prince’s ridiculous demands. Yuna is next to me. I’m holding on to her warm waist.
And he no longer lives in that land.
Pyuuu…
Bam!!!
At that time, two explosions shook the world at the same time. It was only then that I realized that the sound of firecrackers had not become louder. I realized that the explosion sound in my memory resonated with the sound of firecrackers.
“Ha…Ah…”
When I realized that fact, my breathing became heavier and my feet in the mud became damp. It felt like if I left it alone, I would fall into the deep ground. But I couldn’t leave it like that. I want to save myself. And he took a step forward to save Yuna.
“Ellen!”
But then, with a flash of light, Yuna’s hot fingers grabbed my wrist. Then a voice that didn’t seem to be mine came out of my mouth.
“Huh…?”
“What are you doing now?”
“Uh…”
I answered soullessly and raised my hand again without realizing it. Then Yuna this time pressed down on my wrist and pulled me strongly.
“What are you doing now?”
“Uh…Huh? I…What?”
I was stupidly asking and then I looked at Yuna. She was looking at my hand with a very surprised expression. I slowly moved my gaze to follow her eyes.
And then, I saw blood stains coming from her fingers as she scratched the back of her neck.
“…?”
I fell into confusion only after the fishy smell of blood wafted out. Did I… Scratch that hard? You didn’t feel any pain at all?
“I…I…”
“Even your hands are shaking. Why are you doing that all of a sudden?’
“It’s nothing. I just…”
Pyuuu…
Boom!
“…”
The answer died out helplessly in the flames that exploded again. Yuna looked at me like that and then held both of my hands tightly as if she had made up her mind. And then I pulled with all my might.
From Noble mtl dot com
“Come on, Ellen. Let’s get out quickly.”
“Huh? Oh…No. Claes has a favor to ask of me…”
“Stop talking nonsense. What are you going to do with this situation?”
“I…”
I tried to ask again. But at that moment, Yuna’s hands gently wrapped both my ears. In an instant, my ears became deaf and the sounds outside were blocked. I became a gentle sheep and walked following her touch. For some reason, I had a feeling of déjà vu, like this had happened before.
“…”
Just like that, I followed Yuna to her remote place, forgetting that I had to do Claes’ favor. Somehow, as I went on, my legs became weaker and I began to stumble more and more. Then, when Yuna walked so far away that I couldn’t hear the sound of her fireworks even if I didn’t cover her ears, I couldn’t stand it anymore and collapsed in my seat.
“Ah…”
“Be careful, Ellen. You’ll get hurt again.”
“Ah…Yeah…”
“…”
After Yuna confirmed that I was sitting properly, she knelt in front of me. As she was checking my body here and there, she took out her handkerchief from her arms and pressed it hard against the back of her neck. Naturally, her face came closer and her red lips came into view.
“I…I’m fine. I’m really fine now, Yuna.”
I didn’t have time to joke, so I lied. Of course, it didn’t work for Yuna at all.
“It’s okay. Her hands are still shaking like this.”
“Really? I guess it’s because I’m excited. Right.”
“Joke like that doesn’t work, Ellen. So look me in the eyes.”
Yuna let go of her handkerchief, which was sticky to her wound, and lifted up her cheeks. Forced to make eye contact, I was deeply immersed in her green eyes.
“You’ve been like this before. When I blindfolded you and went to the dormitory. That time too, you were gasping with your hands down. Do you remember?”
“Is that so…?”
I finally realized the true nature of the deja vu and nodded. But the joy of enlightenment did not come. Now, just trying to calm down my heightened emotions was overwhelming.
“When we first met, I asked about your past. But even then, I felt like you didn’t answer honestly.”
“…”
“No matter how much I think about it, there are so many strange things about you. It’s hard to recall them all one by one.”
“I…”
“At that time, I didn’t need to know any more, so I ignored it. As time went by, I didn’t want to be bothered to ask, so I ignored it. But I can’t do it anymore.”
“Yuna. I…”
“Ellen.”
Yuna called her name and made her shut my mouth. And she finally got the question she had been asking for a long time out of her mouth.
“Are you really just a student at the academy?”