174 – 169. Selfish Love
Thud, thud.
I was grilling meat.
I was grilling meat without any thought, as if I had become a meat-grilling machine.
It wasn’t because I was concentrating on grilling, but because I was so mentally shocked that I couldn’t think straight.
‘What the heck?’
Didn’t I clearly reject him?
I thought I told him to end our relationship, but in the end, Choi Iseo kissed me, said he loved me, and left.
Even now, he was sitting between the kids, eating the meat I had grilled.
I glanced up at the table and met Choi Iseo’s eyes.
He smiled faintly and motioned for me to come and eat.
I pretended not to see him and went back to grilling the meat.
‘Did I say something wrong?’
That wasn’t it.
But why did this happen?
‘Ha, let’s put Choi Iseo aside for now.’
I thought I should make my opinion clear again.
“Did you say something?”
At that moment, Gyu-ah approached me with an empty plate.
I put meat on his plate.
“Oh, I did.”
“Did you choose Senior Iseo? Senior Iseo seems to be in a good mood.”
Gyu-ah glanced at Choi Iseo.
I wanted to vent my complicated feelings to someone, so I opened my mouth.
But after a moment’s hesitation.
“Get lost.”
I breathed out and chased him away.
“What, even if I’m trying to help you?”
“Oh, go away. I don’t think there’s anything you can do to help me.”
“Senior, aren’t you treating me a little too harshly?”
“You treat other guys like dirt, so I have to treat you like this too. Life isn’t easy, Gyu-ah.”
“……You seem to be the one who has it the easiest, Senior.”
I had nothing to say.
“Go away, quickly.”
“Ah, I really came to help you.”
He pouted, looking offended. I wasn’t particularly interested, but I was intrigued by his offer to help.
“You’ll help me?”
“Yes. I saw Senior Ah-rin earlier, and she said she lost a game and was going to the convenience store.”
“The convenience store is really far from here?”
“That’s why it’s a penalty. She’s already left, so you can just run after her.”
“……Thanks.”
Even if I had to put Choi Iseo on hold for now.
I had to finish what I started.
“Here.”
I handed him the tongs and gloves I had been using to grill the meat.
“……I didn’t expect this.”
“I’ll be back.”
I left Gyu-ah there and ran towards the road, and behind me, I could hear Gyu-ah’s voice calling out to Ahn Hyun-ho.
As I ran along the mountain road, I saw Yoo Ah-rin wearing only shorts and a hoodie, despite the cold weather.
She had earphones in, so she didn’t notice me even though I was right behind her.
“Hey.”
“Doom-doom-doom.”
What kind of song is she listening to?
“Hey, Yoo Ah-rin.”
“Doom-doom-doom, toot-toot-toot.”
Suddenly, she started dancing to the rhythm, shaking her shoulders.
She was so good at entertaining herself that I wondered if she should have been an internet broadcaster instead.
I put my hand on her shoulder and called out to her again.
“Hey, Yoo Ah-rin!”
“Oh my god, damn it! You scared me!?”
Yoo Ah-rin jumped up in surprise and finally looked at me.
“You scared me!”
She took out her earphones and grumbled at me.
“Why are you wearing earphones in the middle of the night? It’s dangerous.”
Especially since this wasn’t a road with anything around it.
If she had made a mistake, she could have gotten into serious trouble.
She didn’t have anything to say, so she pouted and changed the subject.”Why? Are you going to buy me something too?”
“No, I just wanted to talk to you.”
“Talk? Aha, is it about senior Juhee?”
Well, it’s not only about that.
“Yeah, what do you wa-“
Rustle!
“Eek?!”
Suddenly, the sound of grass rustling from the nearby tree. It seemed like the wind was blowing and shaking the tree.
Yuarin’s reaction was unusual.
She was so scared that her body was cowering.
‘Oh…’
Come to think of it, I remembered Yuarin saying that she hated scary stories the most.
“Ah, sh*t! That’s why I didn’t want to come! That’s why I came here listening to music on purpose, you b*stard!”
“Is this my fault?”
“Yeah, whatever. If you have something to say, can you just put on your earphones and listen to music while you talk?”
“Just say you don’t want to listen.”
Rustle!
“Eek?!”
Yuarin, who was now terrified, clung to me. Seeing her sniffling and looking around nervously, the tension I had been holding onto disappeared.
“Jeez, come on. Ghosts and stuff are all fake.”
“Have you ever seen one, you punk?! They’re so scary!”
“You’re so good at fighting… Let’s just go to the convenience store for now.”
It seemed like it would be better to go somewhere with light if we were going to talk.
I didn’t know she would be this scared.
She smelled like fruit soju.
Seeing her clinging to my arm with tears in her eyes, she must have been really scared.
Rustle! Rustle! Rustle!
“Ah, seriously, aaagh!”
“It’s just the wind blowing. The wind is blowing, so the trees are shaking.”
“What wind is blowing! Nothing’s blowing!”
“What the…”
I raised my hand slightly.
There really was no wind blowing.
But why were the trees and grass shaking?
I felt a chill, wondering if it was because of Yuarin.
Swish!
A wild deer jumped out of the bushes.
“Kyaaah!”
“It’s a deer! A deer! It’ll pass by on its own!”
I calmed down Yuarin, who was now hanging on to me, and stared at the deer.
I heard that deer are usually very timid and run away quickly.
“…Why isn’t that thing leaving?”
The deer just stood there by the side of the road, staring at us blankly.
“What’s wrong with it?”
“I don’t know. Don’t they usually run away?”
Yuarin, who had gotten a little better after realizing that it wasn’t a ghost, got off me and clenched her fists.
“Should I chase it away?”
“If we do that and it charges at us, it could be really bad. Let’s just wait for now.”
We waited for about 5 minutes.
It stood there, staring at us blankly like a scarecrow.
“Why is that thing doing that?”
Yuarin grumbled in frustration, but we couldn’t just ignore it and walk past it.
Just then.
Headlights lit up behind us.
A car passed us on the road.
Whoosh!
The deer ran across the road.
Thud!
It was hit by the car and rolled over a few times before dying with its tongue hanging out.
The driver stopped the car in shock and let out a deep sigh.
“…Did that thing make up its mind?”
“Did it get bullied in the forest?”
If it was going to cross the road, it should have crossed earlier. Why did it cross when the car was passing by?
“I’ve heard that deer get hit by cars a lot. It’s shocking to see it like this.”
“It’s like a tragedy.”
Thanks to the deer disappearing, we were able to go to the convenience store again.Something huge had happened, so the serious conversation I was about to have just now was all messed up.
‘What the hell is this?’
I even thought someone was interrupting me. But I still had to do what I had to do.
Yoo Ah-rin, who had bought the things the kids at the convenience store had asked her to buy,
I was outside, blankly looking around, trying to choose my words.
Thinking about the way back, I actually shouldn’t say it now.
If we go to the pension, we won’t have time to talk separately.
“What are you looking at? It’s all dark around here.”
I wanted to say that I was looking at the scenery, but it was literally so dark around me that I couldn’t see anything.
She handed me a Hershey’s chocolate milk.
I took it and instead of opening it, I put it on the table in front of the convenience store.
From Noble mtl dot com
Yoo Ah-rin, who must have realized that my mood was not good, also put the convenience store bag on the table and looked at me.
“You said you had something to say?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
“Well, hurry up and say it.”
Choi Yi-seo from earlier came to mind.
The words I had said with courage did not have the results I had thought.
This time, I need to speak a little more firmly and strongly.
Just like when I spoke to Choi Yi-seo.
It felt like a heavy stone was placed on my chest, but I looked straight into Yoo Ah-rin’s eyes and declared our breakup.
“I don’t think we can date. Let’s end this complicated relationship and find someone else.”
“f*ck off.”
…….
………….
………………huh?
Did I hear that right?
I was looking at Yoo Ah-rin in a daze, and she was looking up at me with an unchanged expression.
“Is that all you have to say? That’s nothing.”
“Did I hear that right? Or did I get hit by a raccoon and I’m dreaming right now-.”
Bam!
“aaack!”
Yoo Ah-rin hit my shoulder.
It hurt so much that I almost cried.
“Does it hurt? It’s not a dream. If something’s wrong with your ears, should I give you another slap?”
“No, no. I’m fine. I heard everything. You told me to f*ck off. Should I take off my pants and spread them out?”
“You got it. You take that bag. It’s your punishment for confessing to Joo-hee sunbae.”
“Yes.”
I blankly watched Yoo Ah-rin’s back as she was about to turn around and then suddenly came to my senses.
“No, wait! This isn’t a joke! I’m not joking!”
“Ha.”
Yoo Ah-rin stopped walking and sighed deeply and turned around.
“Yeah, I heard you. I heard you, okay? Let’s stop. That’s why I said no.”
“No…… that’s.”
“Why? Do I have to listen to everything you say? I feel like I’ve ignored you more than I’ve listened to you.”
That’s true.
But isn’t this case different?
“Ah-rin, I’m talking seriously. I know it’s a sorry thing to say. But I can’t stand it because I’m so pathetic.”
“…….”
“It’s right to stop here. For me and for you guys.”
Don’t you know that our current relationship is somewhat chaotic and abnormal?
Even though there doesn’t seem to be a big problem right now, I could only see an ending that would hurt all of us.
Yoo Ah-rin’s expression gradually changed as I spoke.
Then she put her hand on her waist and replied.
“f*ck off.”
“……hey.”
“You’re having a hard time? Do you think I don’t know that?”
I was speechless.
I was even more embarrassed by her confident appearance.
“You selfish bastard. I thought only you were selfish? Did you think I’d keep moving according to your dick forever?”
A shameless smile appeared on Yoo Ah-rin’s lips.
“It’s not up to you to end it. It’s up to me.”Yuarin, who had been walking towards me, grabbed me by the collar.
She pulled me towards her and laughed playfully.
“So shut up and stay still. You’re getting in the way of my love.”
My lips parted without me knowing.
In that gap, she quickly kissed me.
I felt as if my brain had been hit by a flurry of punches.
Did she even know what she was saying?
However, Yuarin let go of my collar as if she had nothing more to say, and took out a Choco-Mong from the envelope and inserted a straw.
“Are you done talking? Let’s go. The kids will eat all the meat if we’re late.”
It felt exactly the same as after my conversation with Yiseo.
After her resolute confession, I had no choice but to take the envelope and walk away in a daze.
I felt as if a leash had been attached to my neck.
Yuarin’s declaration that she would love me selfishly had bound me just as much.
“Ugh, was I too harsh?”
As we walked along the night road.
Yuarin muttered to herself and tilted her head.
“It’s a bit much to keep dragging you around like this. So let’s set a time.”
“What are you talking about?”
This time, I looked at her, curious about what new nonsense she would spout.
Yuarin smiled slyly.
“I’ll do whatever I want with you during the day.”
She whispered conspiratorially, even though there was no one around.
“And at night, I’ll let you have your way.”
Que oferton
damn