4. Jealousy – (22)
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Chersha approaches and grabs Ed’s hand and leads him to me.
Then he got up from his seat. He stood up from his seat and was obviously taller than himself, so he had to raise his head slightly to meet that gaze.
For some reason, his eyes, facing each other like that, seemed to be tinged with an opaque blue light, unlike a moment ago, even though they were looking at him.
Hesitation. Confusion. Guilty.
I felt like I was holding on to those feelings.
It felt like a sigh would escape without my knowledge.
Just swallowing that sigh inside, I slowly lick my lips.
“You know. Until we meet again Eight years seems like a really long time.”
Her calm voice leaked out to the extent that even Chersha could feel her voice sinking.
Why did he feel that way?
In the end, Edgar is here. It was because he was in Glaade.
In the span of 8 years, Ashera Glade. That her influence was by no means insignificant.
I simply didn’t touch it.
I haven’t connected with him yet.
She was so vaguely relieved that she felt stupid.
The female knight’s influence is already soggy. Was holding him
Edgar now, even with himself in front of him. To the extent that I have such feelings.
It hurts just to realize that…
But it’s still early.
He slowly took Ed’s hand and wrapped it around his shoulder.
If Ed continues to hesitate. In the end, all he had to do was to get closer to him and slowly comfort him.
“Right now, Ed, I won’t tell you to… clear your mind.”
That’s why I don’t try to push him.
Ed went through a lot of hardships and had no place to turn to.
Unlike myself, he must have been so relaxed or had a hard time taking care of himself.
In the end, he only accepted the helping hand that was offered to him.
Chersha thought so.
It’s only natural that Ed’s heart is complicated. No matter how much she thought of herself, she hoped that she would wait.
That’s definitely the same idea as my greed.
Ed He already had a charm in himself. Even he himself is blinded by his appearance.
She was rather surprised by the fact that she hadn’t had a girl for eight years.
That’s why he remembered himself, and the fact that he was looking at him without forgetting. For now, I tried to be content with that one fact.
So, to Ed now. He does not set forth only his own mind.
“So. Don’t make that face.”
Ed had no strength in his hand, even though he made her place it on her own shoulder.
He felt that he was still hesitating…
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Then suddenly he looked at himself and opened his mouth with a big sigh.
“Chersha. I…Actually.”
“Don’t… say more.”
Chersha coldly cut off Ed’s words as she seemed to be trying to talk about her own confused mind that she is experiencing now.
“…”
Chersha just covered my shoulder with his hand. She looks at Ed with sad eyes.
Although he licks his lips slightly. In the end, nothing came out of Chersha’s lips.
Chersha’s sorrowful eyes that contain Ed and Ed’s eyes that contain confusion meet.
Just look at each other like that.
Then it was Chersha who finally turned her attention. She was her
“…Don’t look at me with those eyes.”
Chersha’s voice trembled slightly as she spoke with difficulty.
Chersha didn’t think it would be this hard for her to meet his gaze.
That’s why it was even more shocking.
‘How could that be?’
How could I see myself with those eyes?
She is really confident now…. How concessive is she?
Would Ed know?
No, I don’t know.
He puts himself in front of him… He’s thinking of another woman and now this situation itself.
How much he is having a hard time accepting himself.
And he didn’t want to express himself like that.
How much effort is he making…
‘Without knowing.’
Chersha smiled and finally lowered her head.
‘Really… Not knowing anything.’
But the way she was just trying to express her feelings made me feel angry without even realizing it.
The moment I heard that, I felt like I was going to get angry at him without even realizing it.
So she stopped him.
I didn’t want to hear it at all.
What is he thinking now?
He’s putting himself in trouble because of other women.
I didn’t want to hear anything like that.
And I really hated showing myself angry with him more than anything else.
“…Sorry.”
Then, at the sudden voice, Chersha raised her head in a daze.
“What is…? What are you sorry about?”
Chersha couldn’t stand it for a moment and eventually she asked that question.
“I’m just… sorry for everything.”
Ed muttered helplessly as he looked at Chersha.
It’s like blaming yourself.
Ed gently tried to free her hand from Chersha’s shoulder.
Kook.
“What are you doing now?”
Dazed at Ed’s appearance, Chersha hurriedly shook her head and grabbed his hand.
He seemed to keep it from him. She covers that hand with her own.
“…Chersha.”
“Tell me not to let go of your hand. I said.”
She sank coldly, but seeing Chersha talking so strongly, Ed loosened his grip on her shoulder as if he finally gave up.
As if to do as she pleases.
A complicated mind continued to rage in Ed’s chest.
‘…Is this me?’
Inwardly, I swallowed a continued sigh.
Chersha, Ashera Her own heart that no one can give up.
A disgust soared at the duplicity.
So, unlike when she first entered the room, she became afraid to look at her now, Chersha.
It seemed that her own ugly appearance hurt her, so she just wanted to run away from her place.
Approaching Chersha pretending nothing is wrong with her outwardly. It might be possible to postpone it.
But at the end, what remains?
She is the one who visited me for 8 years without forgetting herself.
Is it really right to treat her with such a pretentious appearance?
So, in the end, even though I tried to convey my feelings and distance myself for a while. As if he had noticed it. Chersha rejected my actions like a knife.
As if you know what you’re talking about.
To convey your true feelings right away.
Even running away from here.
Nothing is permitted.
All of that was too painful for him.
“I’m sorry.”
In the end, the only thing that came out of my pitiful mouth was an apology.
And at my words, Chersha continued to shake her head.
“Ed… Don’t feel sorry for me. Don’t apologize to me! I… I hate it.”
In the end, Chersha, who gave a small shout, looked at Ed and began to reflect her feelings that she couldn’t swallow.
With a sad smile.
“Then just… Don’t say anything. You know ed Can’t you just hug me now?”
While doing so, I hold his hand wrapped around my shoulder with force.
As if to hug oneself as it is.
It’s like saying don’t think about anything and approach yourself.
That’s how Chersha gives her power.
But I didn’t feel any strength in Ed’s hands.
“……”
Chersha felt it, and at the end she let out a small sob.
And she was blank, she asked.
“Really… Why are people so… Nice?”
Eight years have passed.
These few days of seeing each other really didn’t last long.
Because it felt so short compared to the wait.
“Just…. You just have to act on the outside. As if you pretend to give it only for me, pretend to think only of me. If you act like that, I will eventually. You will be fooled.”
Chersha She and Ed. The situation where they understand each other so well.
Because we thought of each other so earnestly. Just a very small minor glance.
Light action.
I felt at least a little what kind of heart the other person had in that.
That’s why clumsy lies or actions to hide my true feelings.
Chersha Kalua, despite realizing that all of that is pointless.
She was pushing Ed to do that at least.
If it’s hard to hide my true feelings like that.
I’d rather have you act.
“Ed…You know that.”
If that were the case… I’m sure he would have known Ed’s complex mind but pretended not to know it.
Even though she knows that she has feelings for other women as well.
In the end, he will pass on his actions and thoughts as he looks at himself at that moment.
Whether it hurts later or not. Because I love you that much more.
“…Are you so worried?”
Chersha burst into laughter as Ed looked away without saying anything.
Ed’s still not straining his hands. I never let him fall away from me and I never allow him to run away from me.
Because of that feeling, I distance myself from myself.
I never thought things would get any better.
How did you meet him now, and how he tried to distance himself from you…Chersha couldn’t tolerate it.
So in the end, she decided to go further.
I blankly think of taking that hand and leading it to reach me.
You have to keep the line.
I think it’s still too early.
All of that captured Chersha’s heart like an illusion.
To approach again.
The feeling that my heart is more advanced.
I know that he only looks at him and doesn’t think of me as much as I do… But I still approach him.
“Ed. Don’t look away.”
That’s why I spit out words in a coercive voice.
“Just…accept me.”
I slowly let go of the hand that had touched her shoulder and approached Ed.