68 – Army
“…….”
“I’m hungry. Let’s eat quickly. I made it today.”
Since long ago, Yoo Seon took good care of me.
When I just entered the nursery school, I couldn’t adapt well there, I couldn’t eat… It was difficult to sleep and every day was difficult.
At that time, Yoo Seon held a spoon next to me, fed me, and… Washed my hair and washed my clothes instead…
At first, the director just told me to take care of it- so I didn’t want to do it, but I thought I was forced to do it. It wasn’t.
Yoo Seon helped me with the hope that I would do well.
Even if the director didn’t say anything, maybe even if he told me not to help, I knew that Yoo Seon-i was the kind of kid who knew how to lend a helping hand to me without worrying about helping me adapt well.
Ever since he was little, Yu Seon was a good kid. And he’s a grown-up, a kid who knows how to shoulder the burdens of others. From some point on, I became anxious about watching Yoo Seon.
He’s good at listening to other people’s concerns, but he actually tried to embrace all the problems he was carrying by himself.
He is afraid that he will not be able to overcome the weight of the burden he is carrying and will collapse.
“It’s delicious..? I’ve made pork stir-fry once. I hope you enjoy it.”
“…”
“You like stir-fried pork. …I like stir-fried pork, too! When I first came here, the food I ate was also stir-fried pork…? It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
“……Yoo Seon-ah.”
I hate Yoo Seon today. He has a mountain of problems to solve, whether it’s the military issue or debt forgiveness, but he doesn’t think of solving them together, and he’s trying to embrace everything…
I want to help, I want to be your strength- I want to walk the same path together, but Yoo Seon-i just tries to judge and decide everything himself.
To be honest, he just enlisted in the army without any discussion with me, so he’s talking like that.
“What will I do if you go to the army…?”
“…”
“Can’t we just not go? I… I can help… We have a lot of work to do. We need to get rid of our debt. We also need to get a security deposit. We need to find a new job.
No matter how you think about it, it’s not the military. If you go there, shoot every day- shouldn’t you have to drive a tank like that? I wish Yoo Seon didn’t do that.”
“……”
After pushing the table to the side, I approached Yoo Seon.
I don’t want to break up. Don’t want to fall I have low blood pressure and need someone to massage me every morning. I need someone to change the light bulb. I need someone to catch the bugs.
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I need someone to eat with, I need someone to walk with on a dark street at night, I need someone to protect me, and also- to caress me and like me.
“Yoo Seon-ah… Think again… Are you really going to join the army?”
I love you, I like you. There is no way to express the feelings I have for Yoo Seon in those short words.
For a moment, I didn’t even answer what Yoo Seon-i said about fighting with Yu-sun in my own way, heung-chi-! And while avoiding wired wire, I found out…
…I found out that I couldn’t be farther away from Yu-sun. In my heart, there is only Yoo Seon… But there is no one but Yoo Seon.
When you ignore Yoo Seon’s words, you put on a slightly embarrassed expression. Seeing that, my heart is already trembling and scared like a stone mass is about to fall down – I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to ignore it.
I always respect you, and I want to respect you, love you, love you… I don’t want to fight with you over this.
“…We have a lot of things to do. We have to pay the deposit, pay the rent, and- we have to find a new job. What should I do if Yoo Sun goes to the army like that?
What should I do for a living? I do not know. When Yoo Seon thought – what should I do..? Please let me know”
…Negative thoughts passed through my head like a panorama.
Splattered blood on the floor. And scream. Again – the smell of blood strong enough to pinch one’s nose. I feel like I’m going to die… Now I’m finally free from those terrible memories.
I thought so, but it dawned on me that if Yoo Seon-i wasn’t by my side, I might be swimming in the terrible nightmare of that day again.
“…If you stay with me, you might be in danger. So… I’m running away from the army for a while.”
“…”
“Aside from a stable job, loans, public pensions and such… I don’t know about you, but I’ve had the wrong relationships with the wrong people.
To make each other difficult, obsessive, and harassing each other. It was a terrible time, a painful time. To the point of throwing away the rest of my life.”
“…What happened at the future high school…?”
“That… I can’t tell you that. Because… Knowing that puts you at risk. Actually, I’m still anxious. First of all, you’re a ‘woman’.”
“What does it matter”
“…I’ve been hanging out with a girl before. She was a girl who only wanted me to look after her. She wanted to be taken care of, she wanted only me to like her, she wanted to be loved. I would understand her. I couldn’t. So just in case. If he saw me doing this with you, would he hurt me…? I was so scared of that.”
“…..”
“So, I’m running away to the army like this. Because, I don’t think I’ll be able to get there…”
“Nothing has happened so far! It’s been almost half a year since we’ve been living together. Has anyone invaded our house during that time?
Or was there someone who just threatened you with a knife? You didn’t! But why are you suddenly here and running away to the army?”
“That’s not it. I didn’t know that it was a human thing, so I promised first of all.
When someone came to me at Future Capital – I thought that way. Could it be that he’s sending someone to see how I’m doing? I mean, that’s what I thought.”
“…Have you seen too many movies?”
I didn’t understand Yoo Seon’s words. Well… If you went to a place like Mirae High School, you would know that you’re from a wealthy family.
Yoo Seon sends a person from Mirae Capital to spy on one person..?
It’s not like Yoo Seon has a relationship with the chairman of Mirae Group. That is nonsense.
Common sense wouldn’t be such a thing. Because of this nonsensical sound, people will die if they get bored with Yoo Seon, and put Yoo Seon in a place where they get hurt…?
I can’t admit that.
“Don’t say anything strange. Kang Yoo-seon. You can’t go to the military. I saw it on the Internet, and if we have children, we can get an exemption!”
“Uh…?”
I looked on the Internet and found out how to get out of the military. There are several things, and one of them is that I heard that if you have children, you can be exempted.
I grabbed Yoo Seon’s shoulder and pushed him. Suddenly, without any warning, Yoo Seon-i collapsed backwards powerlessly. First of all… Ok… I need to take off my pants.
“…Are you going to have a baby just for that reason?”
“…”
“What are you telling me to do?”
We are from a nursery school. There are a lot of children who are not welcome in the nursery school or who are not ready for it.
Because Yoo Seon was led by such an impulsive instinct and… Hated having a baby- So… The first time, he always said to wear equipment, and he talked to the point of getting scabs in my ears.
I came down on top of Yu Seon’s body without any strength.
“Yoo Seon-ah, tell me, what happened at Mirae High School? What happened there?”
“…I have to find out, but I can’t solve it. What are you talking about?”
“Hey! Yuseon Kang, what did you just say..?”
That remark just now. I can tolerate everything else, but I can’t stand this.
“Why..? Why do you say that? When Yoo Seon thinks, I don’t think I’ll be of any help? Yoo Seon-ah, what kind of existence am I to you…?
You’re a comfortable woman to sleep in while hugging..? Or, is it a machine that makes rice? How could you talk to me like that?
Yoo Seon-ah, I will always help you in case of any problem. Until now, I’ve been talking to you many times… Yu Seon-ah. What kind of existence am I to Yoo Seon-i..?”
“Why are you doing this all of a sudden?”
“…Doesn’t I look angry? You’ve always been like this to me! You always think by yourself, decide by yourself! What am I?
Why does Yoo Seon decide on his own? Yoo Seon-ah am i happy? I always cook over there and make boxes, so do I look easy?”
“… I get it. I get it- take a seat”
“Don’t order me! Why do you do as you please, why do you keep saying things to me…?! I’m really like this! It’s so annoying!!!!”
“…”
“Get out”
“…”
“Get out of my house”
“…..”
“Why…? I don’t like living with an asshole who can’t tell me a single thing about my worries, and I want to live in this house? I can’t live with someone like you, who just acts as he pleases and lives as he pleases. Get out of my house right away.
If you don’t leave, will you call the police? Call me right now?”
“I’ll go out, just go out”
An annoyed tone. Yoo Seon-yi took out her bag from the closet, stuffed the pile of clothes roughly, and left the house.